Panacea

Panacea

A Poem by Jiya K. MacKenzie

I was treading across the seamless desert

When a tiny droplet of water patted my shoulder

What made me jump over the cactuses to catch the second drop?

A drop of sweat off my brow dotted the entire sandy stretching desert

A tiny shoot dared to raise its head, challenging the searing vision of the sun.

 

Why did the cloudless sky start pelting raindrops at my parched skin?

What was the epiphany that erased  my footprints and turned the thorns into roses

Getting pulled towards the acrid smell of mysticism

I saw you sitting as a swan amongst a thousand pigeons.


© 2017 Jiya K. MacKenzie



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Reviews

This is an awesome slice of imagination! I love the way your little story is full of dynamic ideas & actions are stated in an unusual way (like water "patting" your shoulder!) This is full of the kind of uninhibited wordplay & thought-play that I crave! It's completely off the wall, but it makes sense too! *smile* Fondly, Margie

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Wow. A amazing use of words and thoughts. You left the reader with something to think about. I wanted to know and read more. Thank you Jiya for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


I found this captivating! Your imagery was brilliant and I found myself caught up on every word.

"What was the epiphany that erased my footprints and turned the thorns into roses"

You're extremely talented!
Please keep up the fantastic poetry!

Your Friend,

C. Lee Battaglia

Posted 1 Month Ago


Your use of imagery in this piece is without flaw, and that isn't hyperbole! This is awesome. Clap, clap, bravo- great job, Jiya!

Posted 1 Month Ago


What have we now? sweat of brow?
to turn the desert green?
No mystic shoot could give a hoot
within this barren scene.

We must ask why, 'neath cloudless sky
we find epiphanic rose.
a swan among a thousand birds
is also one of those.

But, somewhere in that stifling air
drops of sweat and sun
it is all said over my head
the metaphors have won



Posted 2 Months Ago


Jiya K. MacKenzie

2 Months Ago

Thanks for the poetic review! 😊
Jiya K. MacKenzie

2 Months Ago

I'm still learning
An interesting and intriguing poem or rather short story which reminded me of a mirage one might experience in an exotic location.
One earns their crust by the sweat off their brow I guess.
The imagery within this well written poem flowed effortlessly and I could imagine myself within this descriptive scenery.

Posted 2 Months Ago


Surreal desert dreamscape deftly described...beautiful language form, flow, cadence and mystical imagery. Last line slays. Love this.

Posted 2 Months Ago


Jiya K. MacKenzie

2 Months Ago

Thanks a lot Annette!
Annette Pisano Higley

2 Months Ago

You’re very welcome Jiya!
This def has a mystical feel to it.

The 40 days and 40 nights which deranges the senses and transforms the world or the person or both

The landscape is very harsh

Drought, thirst, cacti, searing heat

And then, a vision

a swan amongst a thousand pigeons

Superb.

Posted 2 Months Ago


Jiya K. MacKenzie

2 Months Ago

Thanks dear!
you're incredible, i liked the choice of words in this one.

Posted 2 Months Ago


Jiya K. MacKenzie

2 Months Ago

Thanks a lot for your review Jada!
A swan amongst a thousand pigeons... Cactus's catching perspiration... The mythical tone to this leaves me rotting away in a seamless desert... The sun challenging my vision... A joy to tread this poem...

Posted 2 Months Ago


Jiya K. MacKenzie

2 Months Ago

Thanks silente!
Silente

2 Months Ago

Most welcome

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Added on September 29, 2017
Last Updated on September 29, 2017


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