Oblivion Beside the Shoe Shine Stand

Stumbling through the quarter

Buildings

High stone faces in the sky

She said: “I think ive lost my mind”

But I couldn't’ remember who she was

Oblivion..Beside the shoe shine stand

But there is so much blood behind this skin

Me and love and a soul perhaps

I’m not lost

Just burning

“I have. It just went down that alley” she said

Then I remembered her name

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

"Oblivion Beside the Shoe Shine Stand"
Neal S,
Stumbling through the quarter buildings"
This first line seems like someone in a daydream or even in the night.
I like this next line too: "High stone faces in the sky" As if somehow your inner being is under examination.
Then the dream's subject: "She said: "I think ive lost my mind"
Even though the person is a distant cloudy image not remembered: "Oblivion..Beside the shoe shine stand"
Then it seems things are coming into focus:"But there is so much blood behind this skin
Me and love and a soul perhaps
I'm not lost
Just burning
Maybe your reality is now becoming a clue to what and who you know and love? :I have. It just went down that alley" she said
Then I remembered her name

I would love to know what brought this poem out of you. Cool one!
Blessings,
Kathy

[Einstein Noodle]

interesting ...captivating even ;) i see the scene clearly but i am lost and wanting at the end (a cool thing) ... makes me go back to read over and over to unlock with a newly found key
"I’m not lost
Just burning" ...i really like those lines ..it says so many things about living and growing (allegedly) older :)
E.

[Neal S]

Cool. I'm really glad you liked it!

[Heno Zwarts]

Really like this one, hope you don't see it odd when I say, 'here I feel at home and for some reason I felt I could relate...

[Neal S]

No, not at all. I'm sure every writer cares in some way if the reader relates, I mean truly relates to their words. Thank you again Heno.

[. serah .]

~ this piece, for me, is interestingly abstract in parts... and yet inviting... ~ the image is quaint but still quite poetic... and somehow it reminds me of how my mind is usually somewhere in the himalayas... not lost, not burning, but freezing in high altitude territory i guess...

[Neal S]

Thank you serah. I do enjoy your thoughts on these.

[. serah .]

~ you're welcome, monsieur...