to him

to him

A Poem by bella

I wish you looked at me the way I looked at you

Loving, pleading look on my face

My eyes begging for your love, your attention

God, how truly oblivious you are

You’re unaware, untouched, uninspired

By the love I have for you

Why can’t you feel it deep down

I’ve tried to implant love inside you

But your coldness killed all life, all my warmth

You don’t even care

You won’t come to the funeral

You won’t even send a goddamn card

No condolences, no prayers

Where’s your conscience?

You act like I don’t know you

Like I don’t know exactly what you are

You’re a leech

Who started with himself

You drained yourself

So you moved on

Onto me unfortunately

But I can’t fuel you this time

It will kill me

I refuse to die

Just to put energy into you

Energy I don’t want you to consume

But I didn’t want to love you either

I don’t want to love you now

I should get used to not getting what I want

“We” cannot be



© 2018 bella



Author's Note

bella
I'm not in love with it

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

While your poem certainly expresses pain and bitterness, it also conveys strength and confidence. Calling out the other, for what appears to be a case of unrequited love (or some version of it), is itself a courageous act. To say to the other person, "I refuse to be a victim--especially your victim," is even more courageous. Yes, it's raw but it's pure. I'd keep it as is.

Posted 4 Months Ago


bella

4 Months Ago

thank you I appreciate it
I know your feeling so well ,
Good poem

Posted 4 Months Ago


Very raw and confessional. And relatable

The wounds still feel open.

Unfortunately I have found that not "I love you"s are created equal.

When one person says it, they mean it for life, and are willing to die for you.

When another says it, s/he falls out of love a week later, orders a pizza, and starts swiping tinder.

This feels like doomed love - moth to flame...but who's the moth...and who's the flame?

I like the finality, or at least, the attempt at finality.





Posted 4 Months Ago


At the start, this feels like a romantic rant about love-gone-bad, done in a sort of superficial way. Your word choices make it feel a little stilted. But then as you go along, you seem to warm up to your topic, shedding that stiff word-crafting & moving along to a more gut-level outpouring of how it REALLY feels. At first I thought this was a drawback, but by the time I got to the end, I felt it was a logical journey thru the honest way we spill our guts about such things. The "leech" analogy is well-expressed, as is the clever last line (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 4 Months Ago



Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

269 Views
4 Reviews
Rating
Added on January 11, 2018
Last Updated on January 11, 2018

Author

bella
bella

MA



About
I'm really just trying to gain confidence as a poet and hopefully get better. I have a lot to say unfortunately. Just a Jewish girl trying to help people and writing poetry along the way. more..

Writing
The loves The loves

A Poem by bella


Ra and Luna Ra and Luna

A Poem by bella


anarchy anarchy

A Poem by bella



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..