Always the Same, Always Stranger

The more things change, the less they make sense...

 

Always the same, and always a stranger

Feeling comfort in the midst of danger

Shady places in darkened rooms

Empty spaces are like icy tombs

In this dark place do I shine bright

I have no fear of the coming night

This place unknown and different faces

Tramping through bleak and darkened places

Lurking down empty streets none roam

Forging pathways to newfound home

And the city spreads across streets and cars

Dim-lit alleys and neon bars

Darkened windows, locked and barred

Crumbling pavement, sidewalks scarred

Into my home and out of sight

I slip away in the dead of night

 

 

Reviews

[David Lewis Paget]

I get a sense of emptiness, of a lone figure roaming deserted places and lonely backstreets. You really have set a mood here, one which is strangely hypnotic. I only have a couple of crits - (1) the word 'while' in line two is unnecessary, and trips the metre. (2) 'new bleak' - it might be better as 'bleak and darkened'; again the word 'new' tends to halt the flow. (3) The use of 'darkened' in two consecutive lines; how about substituting 'dim lit alleys and neon bars', or something of the kind. (4) The final line could also be fine tuned to match the rhythm, i.e. - 'I slip away in the dead of night.' There, I said only a couple of crits, and I've given you four - (just can't help myself). Nevertheless, I'm impressed. Write on!

[darkgurl]

I can feel this write, this is very well written.

[Pointblank]

OMG! I love this. I walk with you through this poem. I feel the same comfort in the midst of danger..when I go back home to what is now "the hood". My memories make it safe and I see what is truly me. I'm saving this one.

[closed account]

you painted a picture where I grew up! in L.A. haha,, great imagery, the peace found in your own space.. great!!

[Who among Fire]

I've read several of your pieces and they are well written and interesting. They have a "lonesome observer on the street" atmosphere to them. The words/thoughts flow nicely. I'll keep reading your writing!