A Vow

A Vow

A Poem by mae23

The first time I saw you, you were wearing jeans, a ratty sweatshirt, and beaten up sneakers.

Your hair was a mess, as if you had gotten up less than a minute ago.

Your hands were shoved in your pockets and you were facing toward the ground with red earbuds sticking out from underneath your hair.

You curled into yourself providing proof of your shyness.

 

The first time you smiled, I was surprised by how much your face changed.

Your smile lit up your entire face and seemed to open up your figure as well.

You smiled with straight white teeth showing and a hint of tongue at the very front of your mouth.

You had a dimple in your left cheek where the corner of your lips was slightly higher than the other side.

 

The first time we spoke, your voice washed over me the way the ocean washes over the shore.

You spoke gently and slowly, without rushing to get the words out and taking the time to pick just the right ones.

Your voice was warm and familiar as if I had heard it all my life.

You created a wondrous melody with your speech that I never wanted to end.

 

The first time you laughed I couldn’t help but laugh along.

You laughed with you mouth open and created a deep, wholehearted sound.

You tilted your head back slightly and raised your shoulders.

Your cheeks became flushed and your eyes shown in a way I hadn’t seen before.

 

The first time we touched, sparks went shooting throughout my body.

You radiated warmth that filled me with want and lust.

Your skin was soft, gentle, and smooth and made me never want to feel anything but you.

You left an imprint on my skin that I can still feel today. 

 

The first time we kissed, you were hesitant yet strong.

Your lips were soft and they met with mine perfectly.

You took my breath away in every meaning of the phrase, captivating my mind and body.

Your kiss awoke something inside me that wasn’t there before and set me on fire.

 

The first time you told me you loved me I said it back.

You made me grin with happiness impossible to contain.

You pulled me in tight and whispered softly, sweetly in my ear.

You gave me a gift no one could take away.


My heart had swelled with love, ready to burst.

 

And I have that same feeling every time I look at you, see you smile, talk to you, hear you laugh, feel your touch, kiss your lips, and repeat back the three words that mean more to me every time you say them.

And I know in my heart that I always will.

© 2017 mae23


Author's Note

mae23
Not sure if I should keep the ending that makes it a vow or not.

My Review

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Reviews

This poem could make me smile and cry over and over again. Sorry for the late review btw.

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you!
I really like the way that you start the verses with 'the first time' which gives it a kind of rhythm. I also like the way you describe the feelings.
Keep writing!

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you!
This is wonderful! I love your repetition throughout, and I love your word choices. Keep writing!

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you!
Such a beautiful writing. You managed to capture each moment so well. "First time we spoke/touched/kissed" and all the in betweens... You nailed it. Glad I found your writing, you're very talented. Thanks for sharing!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much for the kind words!
It's so beautiful to remember all the "first times". You are so blessed to be able to bring back all the things that built your temple of love and to know you will always have them.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Hopeful and beautiful story told in the poetry.
"The first time you told me you loved me I said it back.You made me grin with happiness impossible to contain.You pulled me in tight and whispered softly, sweetly in my ear.You gave me a gift no one could take away. "
The above were perfect and positive. Thank you Mae for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you for sharing your thoughts I'm so glad you enjoyed the piece
Coyote Poetry

6 Years Ago

I did enjoy and you are welcome.
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CMC
It's beautiful, and it has an ocean of depth behind the feelings. They say a vow of the heart is the hardest to break, and this gets that idea across very well. Excellently penned.

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you I am glad I got the emotions across
CMC

6 Years Ago

I'm glad I picked them up, and you're very welcome.
Such a sweet, emotional and beautiful poem/story...
Amazing job!
Well done, keep it up!

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

thank you!
Starry eyed, romantic, love struck, perfectly describes those early moments

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you I am glad you liked it!
Beautiful! It's a really beautiful love rite! I really liked it.

Posted 6 Years Ago


mae23

6 Years Ago

Thank you for reading!
Anjali

6 Years Ago

You are welcome.

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Added on June 26, 2017
Last Updated on June 26, 2017

Author

mae23
mae23

NY



About
"My memories are the only places I'll ever see any of it again, and I wonder if this is what writers are supposed to do, rebuild places it in there minds - places long gone, places that disappear, and.. more..

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