Feeling battered & bruised.......

I feel battered and bruised

hurt and upset

lost and losing my own faith

in God and life at times.

And to me, that is really sad

As hope and faith is

what has always helped

me to  battle my own demons

in my own past.

I feel I am struggling to

control my own destiny

let alone my husband

due to this Cancer.

I know in my heart

it's all out of my hand

and his. What will be

will be? But in the meantime

Hell is ruling our

daily lives.

He thinks I don't love him

as he gets angry and upset

over things. He can not

cope with. And I think

he hates me because,

he gets angry at daft things

to me, they are not worth even

bothering about.

How twisted is that?

He is going one way

and am going to the other.

I know he is suffering badly.

In pain and can not sleep.

And scared to hell.

I am so confused at times.

I also don't know if I am

coming or going with all

this craziness around us.