Chapter 11: Moving OnA Chapter by paparapapa
What made Faith want to move on and forget Steve?
Chapter 11: Moving On
I can’t believe him. I was grumbling in my mind when I heard Princess say something.
“Warning! Engk. Engk. Engk,” she whispered while trying to sound like an alarm system that goes off when someone has broken into a house. My eyes widened in disbelief. Again?! Princess decided that she’d use that warning whenever Vanessa enters our room. I told her that it’s totally lame but I just couldn’t stop her. She’s such a child sometimes.
“Wow, I think the last time I warned you was just two hours ago. I can’t believe she’s that clingy,” she exclaimed.
I rolled my eyes at her. “Duh, this is Vanessa we are talking about,” I replied.
“But I don’t think she just wants to see Steve,” she mumbled thoughtfully.
“Yeah? Well, I thought you already guessed it. She has been coming in our room just to show me her victorious wicked smile,” I answered her thoughts.
“Oh. Right,” she replied.
“I just don’t get it. Why is she making such a big deal out of our break-up when Steve has been well-known for being a heartbreaker?” I said, more to myself than to Princess.
“Yeah? Well, I thought you already guessed it,” she grinned while copying the way I stated the same words a while ago. “It’s because you were Steve’s first serious girlfriend,” she stated matter-of-factly.
“He didn’t love me and that makes me at the same level as her other exes,” I argued. Princess decided to shut up. She knew well that I didn’t want to talk about the reason why Steve and I broke up. It reminded me of how pathetic I was when he broke my heart. “I just can’t believe how easily he has moved on like I wasn’t a part of his life,” I grumbled once again.
“Then do it too. Just move on,” she said as she looked exasperated. We had this talk for over a hundred times already, but I just couldn’t find it in me to forget him. I knew that I would never look at any other guy again. I still cried to sleep every night while thinking of what could have been. I was even depressed during the first week since we broke up that I blamed myself over and over again. It took a lot of gallons of ice cream and a lot of advices from friends and family for me to get over that depression.
I must say that David has helped me a lot too. He was there to cheer me up, and he patiently listened while I talked and talked about my happy memories with Steve. He also became my crying shoulder when I just broke down and cried while remembering the sad times. He was patient and he made me feel loved, but I just couldn’t look at him the way I looked at Steve. I decided to just leave it to fate. I knew that there will come a time when I would be emotionally drained and I would finally have the will to move on. I just can’t see it now. But who knows? Maybe someday, I’ll even give David a chance.
I peeked at Steve to look at his handsome face. Only God knows how much I’ve missed him - his hugs and kisses. My eyes widened when I caught him also looking at me. I thought I saw longing cross his eyes but it was so fast that after a split second, his eyes turned blank. He then shifted his gaze away from me. I can’t believe I’ve survived the first month I was away from him. I sighed. How long must I feel this pain?
“What are you doing tomorrow?” I immediately turned my head to Princess. I silently hoped she didn’t see me staring at Steve. She’d be furious… again.
“Tomorrow?” I answered absentmindedly.
“Tomorrow’s Saturday,” she informed me.
“I know,” I whispered. I knew she was thinking that I was losing myself. “I’m staying home,” I faked a smile.
“You’re such a bummer,” she said jokingly.
Our conversation was interrupted when Mr. Wilkins, our Science teacher, entered our room. The day went by fast without any other interactions with Steve. Vivian again drove Princess and me home. When I arrived at home, mom was sitting on the couch watching Pretty Little Liars.
“Wow. I didn’t know you watch that,” I said while sitting beside her. She turned the television off so I turned my head to look at her.
“Why did you turn it off?” I asked, but I saw her stricken face and right then I already knew the answer. She had been giving me that look since I told her that Steve and I broke up.
“How are you holding up?” she asked sincerely while reaching out for my right hand.
“I’m doing fine, mom,” my voice cracked. She tightened her grasp as if she felt the pain that throbbed within my chest.
“You don’t have to face this alone. You have us, remember?” A tear fell from her eyes.
“You’re making my cry!” I moaned while wiping the tears that were falling from my eyes. The love that I felt from her instantly replaced the pain with happiness. She smiled at me.
“I know that he’s your first love, but you can make it through this,” she assured me.
“How can you be so sure?” I felt like a 10 year old who wanted her mother to tell her that everything will be all right.
“I just know. I’m your mother,” she answered as if it was the most obvious one. I tried to smile for her.
“Thank you mom. You’re the best,” I kissed her on the cheek. “I have to go change now,” I added.
“Okay, I’ll call you when it’s dinner time,” she smiled and turned on the television again.
I went upstairs, changed my clothes and busied myself by cleaning my room. Moments later, my mom called me from downstairs saying that we would be having our dinner already. I swiftly turned off my stereo and ran towards our dining table.
After I had dinner, I decided to do some homework because if I’d sleep, I knew I’d cry again. The thought of it made me hate sleeping because I know that once I lay down to sleep, I won’t have anything to think about and my mind will surely wander to Steve again making me cry. However, when I was all done with my homework (and it’s just Friday night), I had no choice but try to sleep. But when I closed my eyes, different kinds of Steve’s face started to flash. The face he wears when he’s with me, the face he makes when he annoys me, the silly grin on his face when he asks me for a kiss. It all came back to me. I was already used to it, but the feeling of missing him? I wouldn’t hope. And just like every other night, I cried and cried again until my mind couldn’t take it anymore and I finally drifted to sleep.
Chains were tied on my hands and feet, but I couldn’t see where they were connected. I scanned the place to look for a wall but there wasn’t any. Darkness surrounded me. The only lighted part was a right square area that I was on. I tried to tug the chains, but they didn’t even budge. I yelped in pain as the chains tightened, I screamed at the top of my lungs to ask for help, but no one was there to help me. I was getting frustrated when I saw something lit up a few meters from me, as if someone decided to turn on a spotlight. I squinted my eyes because the light was too strong and too blinding. I saw two familiar figures hugging each other. I wasn’t sure who they were, but I felt pain shot through my body. I called out for them, but nothing came out of my mouth. As if sensing the desperation that I was feeling, one of the figures turned towards me. I gasped in horror when I saw who it was. Vanessa smiled wickedly at me, before she turned around and ran away from me holding the other person’s hand. Steve! - my mind yelled, and before long, my body followed. But his shadow was slowly disappearing. I tried my hardest to break loose from the chains, but they were too strong. I yelped again as I felt another pain. My body was starting to shake. But then, I heard someone calling my name. I shouted as hard as I could over and over again - asking for that someone’s help while my tears flowed nonstop…
“Faith! Faith!” I heard my mom shouting when my eyes flew open. My heart was beating so fast and I felt so scared. My mom hugged me tight while mumbling “Thank God. Oh, thank God.” I felt her tears drop on the right sleeve of my shirt. I was also crying really hard. I felt drained and empty.
“This has got to stop,” she told me worriedly. I just nodded. “What do you want? I’ll get you a glass of water, or do you want ice cream?” she was talking so fast that I felt I needed to interrupt her.
“I want to call Princess, can I?” I asked her.
“You can, but we’re not sure that she’ll pick up since it’s 2 in the morning,” she sighed.
“I’ll just try,” I whispered. My mom excused herself and went out of the room.
I searched for Princess’ number in my contact list and pressed the call button. My tears started to fall again as I waited for her to pick up. It was on the 7th ring when she finally picked up.
“Hello Faith?” her voice was alert. She must have thought that something was wrong since it’s definitely not normal for me to call very early in the morning.
“Please, help me,” I pleaded while trying to suppress the sobs that wanted to come out.
“Oh my God, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” she sounded really worried.
“I want to forget him. I just want to move on,” I cried. “I had a really bad nightmare and it scared me, I don’t want to experience that ever again,” I continued.
“Sshhh, calm down. Don’t worry I’ll help you. I’ll go there first thing tomorrow, ‘kay?” she replied.
“Okay,” I nodded. “I’m sorry that I disturbed your sleep,” my sobs were now turning into hiccups.
“It’s okay. Try to sleep some more. You’ll need some beauty rest.” I could tell that she was smiling on the other end.
“I will. Good night Princess, and thank you,” I said sincerely.
“Don’t mention it,” she replied, and then we hung up. Because of my mom and Princess, I was able to sleep for a few more hours peacefully.
When I woke up, I felt surprisingly refreshed. I was feeling good at myself that I even sang while I was taking my shower. It felt creepily weird but nice at the same time. Maybe it was the universe telling me that it’s time for me to move on. I smiled while thinking of that bizarre idea. I am not the type who believes in signs, but I guess this one’s an exception. I was already combing my hair when Princess arrived. She knocked at my door and I told her to come in. When she entered my room, I looked at her to greet her, but I was brought to a halt when I saw her you-won’t-believe-what-I-am-going-to-tell-you grin. I raised my eyebrow not really wanting to know what she wanted to say. Knowing her, she definitely had a scheme planned out for me, and I had a feeling I wouldn’t like it.
“You’re having a makeover!” she squealed. I could imagine her excitement bursting around her like fireworks. I frowned at her.
“What? You don’t like it? But I’ve already talked with my mom and your mom and they’ve decided that they would give you these as a gift,” she held up two credit cards. My jaw dropped in shock. “Well, not really give, but they told me to spend a lot of money on you,” she wiggled her eyebrows. When she saw that I was still hesitating, she continued convincing me. “C’mon, you should just grab this opportunity. And I really want to be your fairy godmother for a day!” she said excitedly.
“Fine! But on one condition… you’ll leave my hair as is,” I told her seriously. I loved my hair and I wouldn’t give it up for the world. Oh, okay, I’m exaggerating.
“What? But that’s what heartbroken people should do! You need to change your hairstyle!” she exclaimed.
“You’ll leave my hair as is,” I repeated but more slowly to send the message across.
“Ugh. Fine! I won’t let anyone do something about your hair, but don’t keep on whining while we are doing this, deal?” she held out her hand.
I took it and shook hands with her. “Deal,” I said.
“So, let me ask you first, what do you want to happen?” she asked.
“Well, I really want to change… for the better. I want to be more assertive. And I don’t want to be very conservative with the way I dress, but of course not s****y. I want to have more friends. I just want to be normal,” I mumbled while picturing the person who I want to be.
“Hmm. Assertive, not that conservative, not s****y, friendly, normal. Got it,” she exclaimed. “So let’s start with your wardrobe,” she walked towards my closet and started inspecting each cloth that I have. She made two piles " the ‘Rejected’ pile and the ‘Good Enough’ pile. I just left her there while I read the book Les Miserables. “You should wear skirts to school,” I heard her say.
“But they’re too short,” I protested.
“They’re normal!” she retorted.
“Fine! I’ll wear it once a week,” I replied.
“Twice a week and you’ll wear it this Monday,” she argued.
“Fine. Just shut up and do your thing there,” I gave up. She giggled while I rolled my eyes at her.
“So… we have some shopping to do! We need to replace those worn out jeans and shirts that you have. We’ll also buy some dresses seeing how you don’t even have a decent one,” she reported when she was finally done.
“So let’s go?” I said. I just wanted this day to be over and done with. I sighed.
When we arrived at the mall, she did everything. She chose dresses, jeans, blouses, shirts, skirts, shorts, shoes and sandals that she thought would fit me. And in all fairness to her, I liked every single one of them. I liked her taste so I just let her be. My only participation in her shopping spree was when she made me try on the clothes. She made me turn around and pose like a model from time to time, and she’d actually clap when she likes what she sees. We also bought my own make-up kit - the complete set, and the saleslady actually taught me how to apply them.
After we were done shopping, we went into an optical shop where we bought some contact lenses to replace my old eyeglasses, but Princess also insisted that I buy a new pair of stylish glasses just in case I wanted to wear one. She then brought me to a salon and spa where we had body massage and facial treatment. It had been years since I had relaxed that much. I literally glowed after the esthetician has done her job. Princess then told me to wear one of the dresses that we bought so that I would surprise my mom when we get home. I chose a black strapless mini dress, shorter than I ever wanted but not s****y short. It hugged me at the right places showing off my I-thought-were-non-existent curves, but not over the top. Princess then handed me a black leather bolero to go with it and a pair of sexy black boots. I looked awesome. The beautician’s job was up next. I just closed my eyes as he worked his magic on me. I felt him fixing my hair, but not really changing my hairstyle. It took him hours to do his wonders until I finally heard him clear his throat. I immediately opened my eyes, excited to see the new me. My eyes widened as I stared in disbelief. I just sat there looking like a gaping stupid doll as I took in the amazing sight in front of me. Oh great, now I’m bragging. But really, they did an awesome job! If I was awesome a while ago, I was now stunningly gorgeous. Now, I’m exaggerating.
“Oh my God! You look gorgeous!” Princess exclaimed when I saw her moving towards me from my back.
“I know! I didn’t know I had it in me,” I batted my eyelashes.
“Gross!” she tried to look disgusted. We both laughed hard.
“I can’t wait to see the faces of your family. They’ll be ecstatic,” she talked excitedly.
“I know!” I responded. But another face flashed across my mind. What would he think? Will he regret that he let me go? Will he be jealous if other guys will like me? I gasped when I realized something. Oh no. I’m screwed…
I’m doing this for all the wrong reasons!
© 2011 paparapapa
Shelved in 1 LibraryAdded on November 13, 2011
Last Updated on November 13, 2011
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