Broken wing.

about; a bird who doesn't know what to decide. Unfortunate ending.

The wind roughly rocked the branch holding our home.

 

The cries of my brothers and sisters echoed through the forest.

Our mother wasn't home yet, She was out searching for food to feed our empty stomachs. We were only young, about 2 weeks. Not at all old enough to be left alone.

We waited and waited, we were nervous and hungry.

I felt like i was frozen, it was so cold. My feathers were not thick enough, I quitly stood there in our fragile nest shivering.

 

should I try to fly? Should I try to be free? Or should I wait,

I peered over the edge and hesitated, If I tried and failed then I would just be a lifeless bird lying in the dirt without a heart beat.

But, if I succeeded I would be free, I would glide through the sky and live my life.

 

I stepped over the edge, I wasn't flying.. I was falling.

I screamed, It just scraped my throat.

 

I landed with a thud, I felt my wing snap.

Then, I heard my mothers chirps. If only i had waited just a minute later.

 

I felt the last beat of my heart, 

 

Suddenly I was gone.

 

Author's Note

I know it's really short but hope you like it!

Reviews

[Viki Rachel]

Short, sharp, and descriptive-- my favorite kind of stories. Thank you for not keeping the reader waiting for 60,000 more lines! (haha, exaggeration, of course). I like this story a lot better than most on this website. I know you're only 11, but I think in that time period that is when we find our words and put them into the most wonderful stories and poems. At this time period, we see our mistakes, correct them, and grow as a writer.
Such a terrific piece of writing. 99/100!

[Lulabel]

oh so sad.... loved it

[M. Elizabeth.]

thank you girls !
and thanks sooooo much kanani :)

[Martina]

amazing! For someone your age, this is actually really good. :D
well done! I like it ^_^

[Kanani]

This is great. You're 11?! Wow. You are not perfect, but you're fabulous for your age.
Check you're grammar, capitalization and such. Also a thesaurus may help you! I know you're young so your vocabulary is not extensive, but in the future, this is some things to work on:)
You could really go somewhere in the future, that is certain. Keep writing M Elizabeth :)

[xlunalovex]

I like this and its intensiveness! GREAT WORK!

[M. Elizabeth.]

Thank you soo much :)
my 1st ever review!

[BurningLetters]

This is really sad but good,I think it's a good length it's not to short and not to long and it doesn't run on it's simple but full of emotion :)