Past DueA Poem by CG
The past is a memory that I cannot relive. It used
to be because I wouldn't let myself; I wouldn't let
myself delve deep into the dark pits, the dusty shelves
of my sad memories. Once immersed in the thick,
despondency, it's hard to rid myself of it. Like
tiny pieces of glitter, you find these fits of
sadness in small, unexpected places.
The smell of a book, the smile from a stranger
that is reminiscent of one you once loved, the
feeling that a season brings, the melody to a song,
the feeling of driving down a smooth road in the
middle of the night, just you, your car,
and the white lines,
and suddenly realizing that you miss someone,
you miss how you used to feel,
you miss yourself.
You realize that you're completely alone.
But now, when I bring up the past, not only
do I get sad, but it makes you sad, too.
You believe that the feelings that I once held
are rooted in me, that with just a little bit of
water, these feelings will grow and blossom
again, as they had before they became a
I try to keep it to myself, but it's difficult. I
try to write my thoughts out on this page, but
it's difficult and words just don't seem to do
my thought processes any justice. These words,
no matter which way I will arrange them, no
matter which variety of diction I use, they will
never convey the deep, genuine sadness that
The past is a memory that I cannot relive,
but it's all that I long to have back.
© 2012 CG