Femme Fatale: Murder As A Muse

I wrote a poem with the same title a while back, but it was dumb, so I'm giving it a second shot.

My betrothed has been missing for three days.

Tears are a constant for me.

No one will leave me be (to myself),

so I've had to insist on some alone time,

for my sanity, I told them.

I suppose some day very soon,

perhaps today,

a tall man dressed in blue will rap on the front door,

bearing bad news which will be fed word-for-word to me,

by my own sister,

nonetheless.

 

The policeman will say,

"We found him amongst the weeds surrounding the lake.

We will assume,

for now at least,

that he fell in and drowned,

but we have reason to suspect foul play.

We are sorry for your loss."

I'll be inconsolable for a while,

so it will be that long before they even get around to speaking with me.

 

By then, I should have my story down pat.

Author's Note

I gave this another shot for the Murder Through Poetry (Idk if that's the exact name) contest.

Reviews

[jen -- JG]

I Really like this. The first part covers the disbelief surrounding the loss of someone gone missing quite well.
People hover at times like this and even though you know their actions are due to kindness and concern, it becomes rather smothering at times and you crave time alone.
This is very believable.

I love the lead up to the police coming to the door and saying that the missing beloved has been found and admitting to you, that it could be foul play.

Being inconsolable tends to always give you more time, for many things

I love the last line...

It was quite a twist and one I didn't see coming.

Well done.

Cheers

jen

[Fabian G. Franklin]

he he he, craftily done...

[Gandré]

Muse was in ancient Greek mythology any of 9 daughters of Zeus and Mnemosyne; protector of an art or science, now you bring here into connection with femme fatale, a woman who is considered to be dangerously seductive. This was an interesting title! I also liked how you used the word "betrothed"...I had to look it up, it let me sespect a drama. That he was drowned in a lake in eaastern philosophies this means also going back to the dreams, not negative thought. I know how you have meant it, but nonetheless I thought about this drowning into the river of life in buddhistic mysticism.
So this says to me: she was the perfect murderer,
indeed femme fatale. I think that everything is right
how it is, so one has to go under her skin and look there,
if she perpahs was locked in terrible experiences which
made her to a murderer. I think we shall try to understand
the others, always. I believe that against love there is no weapon.
we can disarm a situation just by smiling, or showign some love.
wonderful writing. loved your creativity in this one.

[Gandré]

I am bookmarking this and will read in few hours later. I need to read when I am fresh, I am on blackberry and late. thx for your review on my small poem about morality, balance and and transcience and I appreciate. This small poem sounds intriguing, yet I need to dig it great you found your way to me. May I point out Blackbirdsong - her writer name, I reviewed just few hours ago her poem on topic femme fatale perhaps you like check her out she is a great strong poetess I promiss you won't be disappointed, interesting what a synchrony on WC tonight. I hope, you smile. kind regards, l. gandr�