Hallucinations

Hallucinations

A Poem by Falanne Shanta

I’m haunted by the memories that you have bestowed upon me from previous encounters. The hallucinations play so vivid on these four walls. And I lay in silence as tears fill my eyes and I push them back only allowing a few to slip from the rim. I question myself over and over about the what if’s and should’ve been. Meeting someone like you that understood someone broken like me was a breath of fresh air or more like Christmas morning. With you, I felt something real and for once I felt like true love existed again. It gave me hope and you began to give me a purpose. You brought me comfort, even when I fought against you. Fast forward to the tough times and I only saw your back. You became someone I never knew before and as much as it hurt, I was still willing to be by your side. I would follow you to the moon. Cross an ocean for you, and now that my gaze isn’t blurry anymore I realize you wouldn’t even cross a puddle for me. You deliberately sabotaged every calculated steps we took. Just for once can I finally meet someone that will be honest with me? Maybe I’m asking so much because it’s the simple things in life we forget. No one deserves to go to bed at night, crying, trying to figure out if they are good enough for someone. Blaming themselves, maybe it’s me, maybe I didn’t do something right. Even when you step all over me, I still pray that God send his angels to watch over you and treat you right. And I wonder if you ate, got home safe, and had a good night sleep to conquer the next day. Even when I know you purposely blocked me out of your life with no explanation. If I had one wish, I would go back to May 6 and never met you in my life. Then maybe this hurt, wouldn’t hurt so bad. I miss the signs or maybe I ignored them, but only if I had that one wish. I would wish your love away.

© 2018 Falanne Shanta


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I love your words , you expressed how hard it is to miss someone that is no longer here

Posted 5 Years Ago


Falanne Shanta

5 Years Ago

Thanks. Yeah I just put pen to paper and just flowed with it

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Added on September 3, 2018
Last Updated on September 3, 2018

Author

Falanne Shanta
Falanne Shanta

San Diego, CA



About
I'm just a southern girl with a love for writing. I want my readers to be able to relate to my feelings as well as me to theirs. My sister once told me, "it's a blessing to use words to inspire" and w.. more..

Writing
May 6 May 6

A Poem by Falanne Shanta