My Fathers Response.

my father found this website read my writing. i have a lot of stuff about him and related to him on here. i was kind of pissed he read it but i thought maybe it would help cuz he would know how i feel. i was wrong. hes back in jail. he left this on my com

VERILY WEARILY

By Danny Boy Lansdale

 

its what i stopped and hoped to be  relieved of ...... all my  agonies....the pressure  my families

just took a stand at my command i ran....and ran .... away with a head full of hurt a   flanel shirt at a vandals concert   dreams i didnt know back then  how time can kill your soul..... how year after year it tears a little bit until your hearts an empty hole... , no more hopes no more dreams  no one cares and no one screams just empty eyes and empty heads doing not a f*****g thing 

 

 

i ran away and fed decay 

until it swallowed me whole 

 

i smash my dreams 

it split the seams 

one man making a very sad

 team 

 

 

i cared so much 

but couldnt do shitt 

i felt so very small 

 

i loved way to much

the pain wouldnt quit 

i was young i left 

f**k you all 

 

i lived in a dream 

i walked the path alone

i no longer gave a crap

   i love my beer

  i love my bong

and all the dope after that

and my leather jacket

and fighting and my boots 

and everything punk rock, too

 

i found joy and laughter 

 

and everything i was after it all       

just came to me 

amusing people 

companionship 

a role in this uncivilized world 

i held the key i knew the deal 

so what if it all wasn't real.... 

 

 but now how do i feel..... 

 

  lost and fucked up

i dont think its worth it i cant even curse it 

its all i have  ever known

 what a pity just how really s****y 

in your eyes im shown 

 

 

amounted to nothing 

silently stuffing 

 my face full of shitt all these years 

i cried out to god  i cried out in vain 

im always ashamed ive never felt pain

cause right now might suck but tomarrows

 okay.......... and tomarrow never sees the light of day

its my lie so i can deal 

its my lie so i dont feel

its my lie its never gone away 

its my lie even if it isnt 

everything gonna be okay

isn't it ?

 

 i never knew it i never saw through it

 of my life lived like a dick 

how long am i gonna be sick

who came up with this most fucked up

tricky shitt?

 

i trapped myself and all ive known 

i crapped myself a t**d turned to stone

i'd slap myself if that'd mean a thing 

i'd cap myself or hang from a string

...  but............

..... its not over yet....

 we  still laugh 

our  hearts  beat 

so i guess

stand down devil

take a seat

for now 

 

 

these tears are for you , its all i got 

 if you dont want them 

just let em rot 

there good for nothing 

in other words 

all bad 

  so whats it gonna be ? 

 

                       from your

                                  dear old

                                                           Dad

 

these tears are for you and not for joy 

i cried them right fresh didn't have a choice

i told you i loved you, you didn't recognize my voice 

 

just know...

it will always be me and it will always be you 

i will always deeply love you 

that nothing can undo

not life not time not people not places

not men not women not all their shiny faces 

 our love always is and always will be no matter how that sounds 

 

"i know........kinda corney"     

 

and some more .....

 

at times is fucked up other times its all bullshitt

sometimes its all funnys other other times makes me sick 

it is what it is its not what its not 

we have who we have

we got who we got

this familys a net or more like a web 

that we're caught ......in...

 

 .........all stuck and stuff

like.......aaaahhhhh!!! ...im all stuck........

...i cant get out...... theres no way out.........................theres no exit?....

this movies never going to end..........................it just keeps on going..........its the frikken energizer bunny isn't it......ISN'T IT!!!! ...

IT IS ISN'T IT?.............AHHHH.......AHHHHH!    

 

ME too i avoid seriousness with humor 

 

Voltaire said in the tenth century

 

  " ...true genius finds everything rediculous..."     

        

 

 

 

i better stop

or i'll

turn into orville redinbacher

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

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