A Winter Poem

Cinquain: poem of 5 lines with syllabic counts of 2, 4, 6, 8 and 2 respectively.... the captcha for this one is "plainish" :))))))))) gotta love it right?!

My snow

December's moon

Beleaguering too soon

the hearth that holds a fiery heat

now cold

E.

11/12/2018

Author's Note

this is a poem i submitted for an on-line poetry class ... (for beginners) ;) and this is the first Cinquaine i have written

Reviews

[barleygirl]

It's amazing how long my woodstove holds the heat after my morning fire fades. I love how your poem conveys the idea of fading warmth from long-vanquished love perhaps (or other warm remembrances). And I love how "heart" & "heat" & "hearth" are similar in sound & nuance. And of course I love how the brisk december moon contrasts with the heat of my hearth. Hope you're staying warm & properly snuggled! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Einstein Noodle]

warm indeed ..and never lacking the snuggles my dear ... you do know ...i have doggies ;))))))))) hugs back to ya girl!
E.

[barleygirl]

Love winter becuz both dogs spend the night on the bed . . . floors are very chilly now! *wink! wink!*

[Einstein Noodle]

oh poor babies! ;) mine love their beds all year round .. and often .. especially Bella the Wonder Dog :))))))) hugs babe!

[goldenscar__]

A hearth can never be cold.. even if it's not fiery , the image remains. I love this poem.

[Einstein Noodle]

such positive thought golden! thank you .. and i'm so glad you like this one ... peace and joy my friend!
E.

[goldenscar__]

I have just seen your comment. You're welcome (sorry for the late reply)

[TL Boehm]

Aww. There is such sadness and resonance to this one, considering it is what it is and therefore a little blink of a poem. It is a blink though that holds back sorrow.
I found it lovely in its sadness.
There will be no corporal punishment today. enjoyed this one much.

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahaha ...well Ms Dominatrix ;) i am trying my best to make the lipogram i submitted for class presentable ... something meaningful ... so i can post it here...it is super challenging for me.... using only one vowel to make a case about something ... thank you for your mercy ma'am ;)))))))))))))))))))))))) gratified you feel that twinge of sadness in this one ...i could ask for no more ... love and peace TL
E.

[DIVYA]

Not easily done what you did here. Expressing a feeling in entirety while adhering to structure and format. Winter’s chill could never come sooner. The hearth could symbolise the heart for me. A death of sorts. So well written! 💕

[Einstein Noodle]

yes.... all fires go out sooner or later don't they ... no such thing as the "Eternal Flame" ... you read through my poem Divya ... thank you for commenting :)
E.

[DIVYA]

You’re most welcome E :)

[Pete]

i think this is quite good, though not a big fan of the Cinquaine. there is a natural depth (not talking about snow) to that format and your words and imagery do it justice. contrary to your words, reminds me that there may be snow on the roof but there's still a fire in furnace ... :)

[Einstein Noodle]

ahahahaha ...well Pete ... that's the way to glow! :))))))))))) thanks for taking time here my friend!
E.

[Paul Bell]

Doesn't the snow look lovely looking out in front of a roaring fire?
Must admit. Never heard of a cinquain.
But you seem to have cracked it.
I would love to invent the one line poem.
I could title it, a lazy poem. Don't think I'll get away with it mind you.
What's your winter forecast.

[Einstein Noodle]

I live in the Ozark's of Arkansas ... I moved here from the blustery winds of SD and so the winters here are mild for sure... this week we have day temps in the 50-60 range and nights in the high 30s ... its crazy around here ... our flowering pear trees blossom in Feb. :))))))))) along with the daffodils ... but inside in front of the hearth anywhere can be cozy and safe from Wintery blasts. .. thanks for reviewing Paul ... see you around eh!? :)
E.

[Paul Bell]

I'm on the way. Bloody freezing here.

[Einstein Noodle]

come on down!! the coffee's brewin' :)

[Tamara Beryl Latham]

Einstein N, your words (like a good Cinquaine) tell a story of Winter's chill followed by the warmth of the fireplace. Your imagery is excellent, especially since this was your first attempt at this classical poetry format. I loved it and hope you keep writing. :-)

[Einstein Noodle]

thank you my new friend! for taking time and for your encouraging words .. i much appreciate you visit .. will see you around the Cafe' eh!?
E.

[Tamara Beryl Latham]

No problem. Keep writing and we'll keep reading. :-)

[Chris Shaw]

Don 't take any notice of that captcha Mr E. Nothing plain about your cinquain. On the contrary, there is fine imagery, contrast and hidden depth. Well done. Makes me want to play with form.

Chris

[Einstein Noodle]

i like the form...its similar to haikus and senryus if you ask me .. in that the form molds the language and can guide the theme due to its limited syllables ... but allows a little more that the haiku and senryu ... i think you will have fun if you play around with it ... thanks again for taking time
E.

[Chris Shaw]

I have drafted one out which I may post later on today. I must say, it wasn't as easy to do as it looks. One sentence you think :)

[Einstein Noodle]

i hear you! another form for the same class is a lipogram ...i had not heard of that one either .. i submitted one but it is still raw and when i get it as close as i can to "done" i am going to post it. One can use only one vowel in the whole thing .. and my problem with mine is trying to actually say something and stick the that one simple rule ........arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! ;} i will watch for you cinquaine for sure.

[Perdition]

Stupid December..lol. Wonderfully reflective mood for a first or a thousandth attempt..I would have thought you were adept at this form. Being at the end of summer myself I feel the impact and know that moon is coming if I am as lucky. Good idea that online class. Thank you for the wonderful read at this hour of night. An insomniac's heaven.

[Einstein Noodle]

:) yes..stupid indeed ;) thank you for taking time Perdition .. and your generous review .. its encouraging to know your thoughts ... and yes... our heaven indeed .. i go to bed early .. usually around 6 or 7 and when i wake up .. usually around midnight .. i get up ... i don't like the tossing and turning of "trying" to get to sleep ... but is works out .. Bella the wonderdog is usually up around 2 and Beauregard the pup at around 4 ... so we go out to watch the moon and stars if visible .. otherwise we all sniff ;) i shouldn't complain about Dec. tho .. i moved to the Ozarks from way up north in the mid west states ... very .. no .. bitterly cold and snowy ... ugh! winters here are temps at night 30-40 and days 50s-60s ... our flowering pear trees blossom in Feb. ;))

[Perdition]

Well now I'm jealous..love the Ozark AND you have 2 companions to travel the night with ...I only have one fox that visits me and I have to keep him safe from paranoid neighbors so we only get to visit at night. Funny how winter has a way of letting you know just who's in charge around here. Insomnia ?..well that's just a poet's life as well you know. Thanks E.!

[Einstein Noodle]

wow...a friendly fox ..how cool!

[kitty]

Keep the home fires burning ... stoke it with love! I say. Sad but meaningful. Thanks for the insight.

[Einstein Noodle]

and thank you for reviewing this cinquain, kitty! i will try always to take your advice and keep the home fires burning ... love is all we need eh!?
E.