Old Habit

All the way yet not long .

You travelled  and crumbled , 

Cant find me ?  

There I am 

Hanging with the cherries , 

Fainted with the summer leaves . 

Dance beneath your happy sky , 

I'm in the tickling rain, 

Bringing lights and sounds , 

And something that actuate

 your sixth sense. 

All the way yet not long , 

You sang and lost the words ,

Couldnt hear me ?  

I have been drunk in the harmony , 

playing up and down with the fingers that touch the piano. 

Being the melody of your voice , 

That hit the love song .

All the way down, 

The journey to see the flesh and blood won't end,

Gone the face , gone the footprints, 

The heart is stubborn, 

Couldnt afford to say goodbye, 

Oh but the mind is playful , 

The colours are gone , 

But the painting is still there

Sneaking away- , 

Old habit of the soul, 

Now find me love  . 

 

Reviews

[JayG]

"All the way yet not long .
You travelled and crumbled , "

For you this is meaningful because you have mental images, memories, and your intent for the words in your mind. And that gives life and direction to the words.

But your reader has only what the words suggest to them, based on THEIR background and experience. So when they read, you have mental images, memories, and your intent for the words in your mind. But they don't. See the problem?

When you say, "You travelled and crumbled," you're obviously not talking about me. But since I don't know who you are thinking of, and what they were t the unknown speaker, how can I parse the words into something meaningful? After all, no one I know has ever crumbled.

[Sriparna]

When someone writes they might write on some concepts they possess sometimes.The piece might not be about the reader or the readers might not be able to relate it with their lives. Its about someone's life and her concept about the life and love , about how she expresses her love. I just hope people to enjoy the ambience and the concept . Anyway glad to know about your viewpoint and to express the fact .Thank you.

[aine]

What an amazing combination of words!

[Coyote Poetry]

Wonderful use of words dear Poet.
"Couldnt afford to say goodbye,
Oh but the mind is playful ,
The colours are gone ,
But the painting is still there
Sneaking away- , "
The above lines could stand alone. I like the sense of a playful and hopeful mind. Thank you for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Sriparna]

Thank you very much for the appreciation. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Was my pleasure and you are welcome.

[Surya]

you ended with beautiful lines....and whole scene was a beauty...I enjoyed reading..:)

[Sriparna]

Thank you very much ☺️

[Gaurav]

No words in the world can define the hidden meaning of love as your poem does. These are the subtle universe of loving lives that lead us to live. So much to give. Thanks for sharing. A beautiful piece.

[Sriparna]

This means a lot to me. Dont be so formal :P anyway my pleasure 😊