The Red Umbrella

 

The air sighed heavily

Whistling a song of chaos

As it trampled upon

The withering grass.

 

The rain furiously narrated

Sonnets of despair

As it fell in great sheets

Across the field.

 

I have always loved the wind,

I have always cherished

Its lullabies.

 

And I have always loved the rain,

I have always listened

To its verses.

 

But… Did I anger them?

 

I held on to my red umbrella,

The only thing that kept me

Safe from the wrath

Of wind and water that day.

 

Suddenly, the wind gushed

Through my fingers

And the red umbrella floated

Through the black rain.

 

In the middle of the grassland,

I was left shivering and drenched

In tears of the nimbus

And tears from my own eyes.

 

I have always loved the red umbrella.

 

In its silence, its hue spoke

Of the sweetest poetry

When my heart longed for it,

And uttered out its misery

When I was the only one

Who could listen.

 

It spoke of secrets never told

To the rest of the world

For it knew that only I

Could have understood.

 

It was the only thing that kept me

Safe from the wrath

Of wind and water that day.

 

I still wait for the red umbrella

Maybe someday, the wind

Shall carry it back to me.

 

Maybe I can take hold of it again

One sweet rainy day,

One sweet windy day,

And perhaps the red umbrella

Won’t go away.

 

 

© Maxinne Marie

Reviews

[Sarah Williams]

I truly enjoyed the story told in this piece. Sometimes things that we love, things that we've always been comfortable with, turn on us and score our hearts...but hearts heal, faster than our minds allow them to really. There are many wonderful and stark images in this piece, the idea of the "red" umbrella against the black and forbidding sky is quite nice...reminds me of Coleridge and his use of the color "red" in many of his pieces.

Mechanically...I think there were places where this could have flowed better (particularly stanzas 1, 6, 8 and 9). Overall, though, I really liked reading this!

In tears of the nimbus
And tears from my own eyes.

--I like these lines...interesting imagery!

[Echoes of Eros]

Threaded with scarlet light, your words whisper such an enchantment. Your poetry feels like music woven with endless colors... xo

In its silence, its hue spoke
Of the sweetest poetry
When my heart longed for it,
And uttered out its misery

[jacob erin-cilberto]

The rain furiously narrated
Sonnets of despair
As it fell in great sheets
Across the field.

wow on those lines....and i really love the metaphor used here...

really good stuff..

when all our protection is taken from us..we are left with the bare bones of heart...and we must survive the rain.

[zainul]

Lovely write.
Describes a wonderful situation where a person lost her red umbrella while enjoying rain.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

I liked how this builds to a climax...
and tells the story of the one affected...
and yet through the end of it all...
everything is put into light of the effect...

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Wow, I love how you presented your concept here. Something important to you was lost...but still, your hope is still there that someday that valuable thing will be brought back to you...in due time.

A splendid piece, Kabayan. Nice to meet you.

[Jaz_o]

I liked this > well done

[Corrupthoughts]

You have an obvious knack to write and depict nature, something I may self and privy too. I see a metaphor with the red umbrella though I am not sure what it is connection. Something lost, and due to being red I am brought to the conclusion of lost passion. at least, it is my interpretation.

"The rain furiously narrated
Sonnets of despair" -- This is awesome personification, truly perfect words.

There is a comfort that the author takes from the rain but in this piece I sense it acts as a release of sadness. This piece is beautiful and I have very little to critique, from my stance it flowed perfectly.

[Babe Roxx]

A beautiful piece of work in this poetry...a lovely read.

[Robin]

this is beautiful writing

[Pax Analog]

Lyrical, poignant, touching. Reminds me of WC Williams (only ideas in things), who wrote of a red wheelbarrow.

Your red umbrella is powerfully invested in protective meanings beyond the rain.

This fine poem conjures haunting memories of all comparable objects associated w/protective comfort.

Lingers in the mind long after reading. . .