Number Two ManA Screenplay by ScottTheScreenwriter An underachiever who operates the lavatory service vehicle at LAX is given the opportunity to fulfill his dream of becoming a pilot when he prevents the crash-landing of a large commercial jet airline FADE IN: EXT. LAX - ESTABLISHING SHOT - MORNING Large commercial jets take off from the runway into the morning sky. The warm glow of the rising sun illuminates them in an orange hue. A large jumbo jet extends its landing gear and touches down on the runway. Men in orange vests direct the planes on where to turn with neon wands in hand, as if directing a symphony orchestra. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON REAR OF TRUCK A hand comes INTO FRAME and a large translucent hose is wound around a metal pole. CLOSE ON DOOR CONTROL PANEL A hand comes INTO FRAME and pounds against a large red button. BACK TO SCENE A large metallic shutter opens from floor to ceiling, allowing the morning light to pour through, illuminating a large, complex piece of equipment sitting in the back of the truck. CLOSE ON MAN'S EYES A look of determination and extreme confidence. This is a man ready to get things done. A LOUD ENGINE roars to life, like a dragon waking from a thousand years of sleep. CLOSE ON LARGE WHEEL which lurches slowly forward. EXT. LAX - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS A large jumbo jet rolls slowly forward on the tarmac. It docks with the loading bridge and comes to a complete stop. The truck, red light blinking on top, moves swiftly forward across the runway, quickly approaching the plane. A loud HONK as another similar truck passes by. The driver of this second truck nods and salutes. Our determined driver nods back. The swiftly moving truck approaches the plane, which is now unloading its passengers. The truck drives directly underneath the large plane and suddenly comes to a stop. The driver cuts the engine and thrusts the driver's side door open. He leans out and boosts himself onto the rear of the truck. We finally get a good view of the driver in his navy blue jumpsuit and orange vest. He is PAUL PARRISH (40s), a well proportioned man of average height. He's lucky enough at his age to have a full head of wavy brown hair. He's not breaking any hearts with his looks, but at the same time, he's no cave troll. With the push of a button, Paul is lifted up high into the sky by a cherry picker platform. The white underside of the plane approaches quickly as Paul confidently rises into the sky. Just as it appears that he is going to slam into the underside of the plane, he flicks a switch on a remote control, and the platform comes to an abrupt halt. Paul reaches above his head and quickly flicks three large red latches on the underside of the plane. A large panel opens, revealing a round hole directly in the middle. Paul grabs one end of a long, translucent hose hanging from the edge of the platform and raises it to the plane. With the flick of his wrist, it locks into place. A long beat. Nothing is happening. Paul elbows the hose and brown liquid suddenly flies down the tube. He immediately plugs his nose as the waste is emptied from the plane. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - LATER Paul is emptying the vacuum device of the precious cargo he recovered from the plane. It drains down into a large vat and, thankfully, disappears from view. SYD Pauly, how you doin', brother? Paul spins around to find SYD PETERSON (30s), his slightly overweight, man-child of a best friend and co-worker rinsing off a pair of yellow rubber gloves behind him. PAUL Oh, hey Syd. Not too bad. One of the new 787s rolled in this morning. Five restrooms on board, can you believe it? SYD Are you serious right now? Don't f*****g kid around with me, man, my heart can't take the excitement! (beat) You know what that sounds like? Five times the work. Syd grabs a large, heavy hose from the floor and drags it over to the metallic vat. With a loud WHOOSH, the vat begins filling with more waste. PAUL (yelling over the noise) Whatever, I think it's kind of neat. Five restrooms on a single plane. You don't see that very often. It's a magical time we live in. SYD (yelling over the noise) You been huffing the fumes again, buddy? You need to get out more. Come out with us to the Four Stripes tonight, I'll buy you a beer. The loud noise of the machinery comes to a stop. A slender, geeky-looking girl, wearing the same navy blue jumpsuit as Paul and Syd approaches. She is ALLISON (30s), another employee of LAX's lavatory clean up crew. ALLISON All right, first round's on Syd! Let's get the hell out of here. SYD I'll keep the drinks flowing all night for you, Al. Syd blows her a kiss. ALLISON Gross. Never mind, I'll get my own beer. When are we going? PAUL I don't know, you guys, I've got a lot to catch up on here. The vats haven't been scrubbed since Monday. That's against at last four violations. Plus... it's a pilot bar. Paul and Allison exchange a knowing glance. SYD Who gives a s**t? Those a******s like to think they're better than us, but don't let them get to you. If we didn't do what we do, people would literally have to s**t out the window of the plane... don't even get me started on the probability of people getting sucked out the window mid-squeeze. We're basically saving lives here. Paul's frown reluctantly melts away as a smirk forms on his face. PAUL Fine, one beer. I really can't be out all night, though. EXT. FOUR STRIPES BAR - ESTABLISHING SHOT - EVENING A small brick building painted navy blue. The neon sign above the door contains the namesake four yellow stripes, much like you might see on a pilot's uniform. To the left of the logo reads "Four Stripes". INT. FOUR STRIPES BAR - CONTINUOUS A small mountain of empty beer mugs surrounds Paul and company. Syd takes the last swig of his current round and slams the mug down. SYD So anyway, here I am standing on the tarmac next to my truck and this chick that's waiting to board her little Turboprop, she keeps asking me what it's like being a pilot. TED (30s), an extremely sardonic man who also works with the sanitation crew, is listening intently to Syd's increasingly boisterous story. TED Wait, wait, hold on... she thought YOU were a pilot? You? SYD (nodding) Ted, I'm telling you, she was clueless. I might as well have been Wilbur-f*****g-Wright! So, she's blabbing away about how she's always had a thing for pilots, I'm trying to figure out if she's joking or if she's really that dumb, and meanwhile the real pilot is standing over by the plane eavesdropping on the whole conversation. ALLISON No one in their right mind is stupid enough to believe YOU'RE a pilot, Syd. Paul laughs and raises his glass in cheers to Allison. SYD Ah, but that's where you're mistaken my beautiful but naive friend. So, she gives me her number and tells me to call her when we land in Scottsdale, because apparently that's where I'm flying her to. I take it, give her a wink and she hops on the plane. PAUL So, then what? SYD What do you think? I bought a ticket for the next flight to Scottsdale. ALLISON You're disgusting. She still thinks you're a pilot? SYD If you consider "Oh, Captain Syd!!!" to mean anything, then yeah! The table erupts with laughter. PAUL I've gotta hand it to you, that's pretty smooth. SYD Stick with me, kid, and I'll teach you everything I know. How's things with Sandra? A short beat. PAUL It didn't last. We actually broke up last weekend. Everyone stares at Paul, waiting for an explanation. PAUL (CONT'D) She said I wasn't ambitious enough for her. Apparently I'm not doing anything with my life. She has a good point. This job isn't exactly glamorous. I should have seen it coming. SYD Yeah, that's kind of true. ALLISON Syd, don't be an a*****e. Don't worry about it Paul, any girl would be lucky to meet a guy like you. Sure, you're not a pilot like Syd over here, but you're a smart, kind guy. You just need to have a little more confidence in yourself, that's all. SYD She's right, buddy. You can do anything you set your mind to. Hey, here comes the waitress. She's been smiling at you all night, ask her if she's doing anything after her shift. PAUL Are you serious? She's a waitress, she's paid to smile at everyone. TED Oh, yeah, this is a great idea. Syd turns around in his chair. SYD Excuse me? Miss? My friend wanted to ask you something. PAUL Syd, what the f -- The waitress strides over to the table between Paul and Syd. WAITRESS Hi! What's up? PAUL (voice cracking) Oh, I just wanted to... wondered to... if you had any appetizers on special tonight? Or whenever night? Ted mouths "whenever night?" to Allison. She elbows him in the ribs. WAITRESS Well, we have a special tonight on cheesy potato skins for $5.99 and two for one on the chicken wings. The entire room seems to hold its breath for Paul's next move. PAUL I think just the bill. WAITRESS OK, I'll be right back. Paul takes a long sip of his beer, which conveniently covers the deepening shade of red on his face. Syd covers his face with his hands and pretends to cry. TED I'm pretty sure cheesy potato skins was a euphemism for sex. I actually think you're good on this one. EXT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - ESTABLISHING SHOT - NIGHT A shoddy-looking ten-story apartment building. Not the kind of place you'd want to call home if you had the choice. INT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - CONTINUOUS Darkness. The CLINK of a KEY unlocking a door. The door swings open, illuminating the apartment in the light of the hallway. Paul steps into the apartment and heads straight to the bedroom. As he walks, he kicks off his shoes, lets his shirt drop to the floor, and kicks his pants against the wall, mid stride. BEDROOM Paul slides under the sheets of his twin bed and flicks the TV on. He channel surfs for several moments, not finding anything of interest, until a news report catches his eye. An attractive female NEWS REPORTER is sitting in the cockpit of an airplane. NEWS REPORTER Boeing's latest marvel, the 797 CloudSurf, is set to make its maiden flight tomorrow from LAX, flying from Los Angeles to New York City. Veteran pilot, William Mankiewicz, is set to pilot the 5,500 square foot jumbo jet. WILL MANKIEWICZ (40s), a tall, confident looking man, wearing a pilot's uniform, is shown on TV in the pilot's seat of the large aircraft. NEWS REPORTER (O.S.) (CONT'D) Are you excited about tomorrow's flight, Captain Mankiewicz? Paul suddenly sits up in his bed with a crooked grin on his face. PAUL Son of a... (beat) Will? WILL Was Napoleon excited when he set sail on the... ship that he used? The same one that discovered this wonderful land that we all call home? Yeah, I bet he was. I bet he was he was so excited that he pissed his pants three times before he had the nerve to get on board for an interview. An awkward beat. WILL (CONT'D) I didn't do that. I'm just saying he might have. NEWS REPORTER So wait, are you saying that in some aspects, your story is actually quite similar to the man that discovered America? WILL Very similar, yes. It's a very similar situation. I'm glad you brought that up, you see, I fully agree with you. I think kids will probably be reading about this in history books in a few years. Paul shakes his head in disbelief. Clearly, he has a history with this man. He grabs the remote and turns the TV off. PAUL Unbelievable Paul closes his eyes and dozes off. FADE TO BLACK. DREAM SEQUENCE - INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - LATER PAUL'S POV MAN (O.S.) Paul, the landing gear! I said lower it, now! The ground rushes up to meet the cockpit. There's no way this will end well. A hand comes INTO FRAME and pulls frantically on a lever. Will's head appears from the back of the cockpit, smiling. WILL Hey buddy. Looks like we're gonna die. Oh look, a mountain! A mountain has appeared from nowhere and the plane is inches away from smashing into it... CLOSE ON PAUL'S EYES which are bulging out of his head. He knows he's about to die. END DREAM SEQUENCE. INT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - BEDROOM - NIGHT Paul wakes up with a start, drenched in sweat, breathing heavily. He looks around the room and something catches his eye. He gets up from the bed and walks over to the wall of his bedroom. CLOSE ON FRAMED PHOTO A group of young pilots-in-training posing in front of a small prop plane. A young Will and Paul are in front, arms around each other's shoulders. BACK TO SCENE Paul quietly chuckles to himself. He looks to another photo frame on the wall. CLOSE ON FRAMED PHOTO Paul, smiling and laughing with a young girl, presumably the one that just dumped him. BACK TO SCENE Paul takes the frame off the wall and tosses it in the trash can. EXT. LAX - TARMAC - ESTABLISHING SHOT - MORNING The monstrous 797 CloudSurf sits on the tarmac, surrounded by members of the media. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - CONTINUOUS CLIFF (40s), a paunchy, balding man, wearing a wrinkled white dress shirt and black tie, is standing with his hands on his hips in the middle of the maintenance hangar. Paul, Ted and Allison are all standing around him. CLIFF All right crew, gather around. (beat) That means you too, Peterson! Syd is standing in a corner talking on his cell phone, pretending to wipe up a non-existent spill with a mop. SYD All right baby, I've gotta go, uh... fly a plane. Are you gonna wear that thing for me tonight? You know, the one with the little straps... CLIFF (O.S.) Syd! Syd hangs up the phone, sets his mop aside, and walks over to the group, slipping a bit on the slick surface he was "cleaning". CLIFF (CONT'D) All right, pick up your ears folks. Today's a big day. In case any of you didn't notice, we've got a plane the size of Rhode Island sitting out there on the tarmac and the media is going to be everywhere. That's why I need you all on your best behavior. I don't want any slip-ups. Ted throws his hand in the air. CLIFF (CONT'D) What? TED Uh, just curious, Chief, if I were to spill a septic tank all over the runway... what would that be? Would that be a slip-up? CLIFF Jesus Christ, of course! Does that normally happen? TED Just making sure we're on the same page. I think I've got it, sir. Allison bites her lip to keep from laughing. CLIFF Guys, I've got an ulcer that's slowly killing me and three blocked arteries. I could pop at any moment. Can we please just cut the sarcasm and make sure things go smoothly today? Everyone nods and murmurs "yes" at the same time. CLIFF (CONT'D) Great. Let's get to it. TED Sure thing, Chief. CLIFF Why is it always Chief with you? Why Chief? I'm not a Chief, I'm not even a... (beat) Cut the s**t and get to work. Cliff storms off to his office. TED Chief's upset. Everyone goes their separate ways, except for Allison, who walks over to Paul. ALLISON Hey, I didn't really get a chance to say sorry last night about your girlfriend. We were kind of joking about it, but it really sucks, man. PAUL Don't worry about it, it's no big deal. I'm fine with it. ALLISON You know, if you ever wanna go out and talk about it sometime, or whatever... I'm a good listener. Paul gives Allison a strange look. PAUL Go out? What do you mean? Just the two of us? Allison shrugs, a glimmer of hope in her eyes. PAUL (CONT'D) That would be weird, why wouldn't we invite the other guys? ALLISON (flustered) No, we could. I just thought... never mind. Stupid idea. I should get to work. Paul shrugs and walks over to his truck. He glances back at Allison as he opens the door and gets in. INT. LAX - TERMINAL - RESTROOM - DAY CLOSE ON CELL PHONE "Candy Crush" is being played. The player makes a move and a bunch of the candy disappears from the screen all at once. BACK TO SCENE Paul is sitting on the toilet staring at his phone, looking awfully pleased with himself. PAUL (in sync with the game) Tasty. The CREAK of a DOOR. MAN #1 (O.S.) No way. She's so far out of your league, it's not even funny. You're not even playing the same sport. MAN #2 (O.S.) My league? I'm Babe Ruth, Derek Jeter and A-Rod all rolled into one. And I mean A-Rod when he's fully juiced. Who do you think you're talking to? Paul looks up from his game. He squints his eyes and leans forward. PAUL'S POV As seen through the slit in the stall door, Will Mankiewicz, dressed in his pilot's outfit, is splashing water on his face at the sink. Beside him is his co-pilot, STEVE, a tall heavyset man in his 40s with a beer gut. STEVE (MAN #1) Yeah well, I've got ten to one odds against you making it happen. WILL (MAN #2) I'll take that bet. Will and Steve leave the restroom. BACK TO SCENE Paul quickly pulls his pants up, flushes, and heads for the door. He abruptly stops in his tracks, hurries back to the sink and quickly washes his hands. INT. LAX - TERMINAL - CONTINUOUS Coming out of the restroom, Paul scans left and right. Paul clears his throat. PAUL Hey, Will. Will and Steve both turn around. WILL Autographs are fifty bucks a pop, pal. You don't look like you can afford it, so why don't you... just... (beat) Holy s**t. Steve. Slap me. Steve slaps Will as hard as he can, revelling in the opportunity. WILL (CONT'D) God DAMN IT! It's a figure of speech! Steve shrugs. Will rubs his face as he runs over to Paul, wrapping him in a powerful bear hug. Paul hugs back, but taps him on the shoulder when his oxygen level begins to deplete. WILL (CONT'D) Fifteen years, you son of a b***h! Fifteen years! How the hell have you been? PAUL I'm doing great, how about you? WILL Living the dream, man. Living the dream, you know how it goes. Though, to be honest, the media attention is really starting to give me blue balls. Everyone wants a piece, what am I supposed to say, no? Gotta give the people what they want. PAUL Yeah, of course. It's crazy around here today. Steve hesitantly approaches. Paul looks at him awkwardly, waiting for an introduction. WILL Oh! This is my co-pilot, Steve Ackerman. Stevie in the Sky with Diamonds. Little nickname I have for him... Steve and Paul shake hands. STEVE (to Paul) Don't ever call me that. He only gets away with it because he flies the plane. WILL You love it. Steve shakes his head. WILL (CONT'D) Yes you do, you love it. Don't say you don't, just because we're in front of company! You always do this! STEVE All right, all right. Jesus. WILL You're goddamn right, all right! (awkward beat) Paul and I were in flight school together. He was top of the class, best damn pilot I ever worked with. What have they got you flying these days, man? 747s? 787s? PAUL Uh... no, actually, I... I decided not to go down that road. WILL Right on, right on. So, just little puddle jumpers, then? PAUL Uh, no... I'm actually on the... (coughs) Custodial staff. WILL The what, sorry? For a second there I thought you said custodial... (trails off) Paul shrugs and points to his orange vest and brown jump suit. Will looks deeply disturbed. WILL (CONT'D) I think I'm gonna throw up. Paul shrugs. PAUL It pays the bills... WILL Wait, hold on. I thought you graduated later that year. They let you take the test again, didn't they? That s**t wasn't your fault, man. PAUL I don't really like to talk about it. WILL What a waste of talent. That breaks my heart. Someone with your credentials and here you are... (beat) You know what? You're coming with us today. PAUL Me? What? No, I can't, I have to empty out, like, twenty planes before my shift ends and -- WILL You don't have to do anything, except change out of those prison robes. The Paul Parrish I knew would never stoop this low. This is an important day for me and I want you up there with me. I'll find a spot for you in first class, right beside the cockpit. I won't take no for an answer. Paul glances back and forth between Will and Steve, searching for any excuse to back out of the situation. PAUL (forcing a smile) Sounds like a plan. WILL Yes! I knew you wouldn't let me down! Stevie, go find a spot for Paul. STEVE It's all booked up, boss, there's no way -- WILL Stevie, you useless s**t, go and find a spot for Paul before I start to get upset! Steve mutters to himself and walks away. WILL (CONT'D) Nice guy, but a bit of a whiner. Paul smiles awkwardly. INT. LAX - TERMINAL - LATER A busy airport terminal. Commuters have their faces buried in a vast array of devices. Paul, in stark contrast, is sitting on the edge of his seat, staring straight ahead, looking as though he's about to throw up. He glances out the window of the terminal. The CloudSurf aircraft is docked and attached to the loading bridge. An IRATE WOMAN in her late 50s is yelling at a stewardess near the gate. IRATE WOMAN I paid for that seat almost a year ago, what do you mean my ticket is invalid?! Will and Steve appear from around the corner, accompanied by BUSTY STEWARDESS #1 and BUSTY STEWARDESS #2. Both women are in their 20s and could easily pass as sisters. Will spots Paul from across the terminal. He points to the irate woman and winks at Paul. He then squeezes the asses of both stewardesses and winks again. Paul looks disturbed by the gesture. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small bottle. CLOSE ON XANAX BOTTLE BACK TO SCENE He pops one into his mouth and closes his eyes. STEWARDESS (over the PA) Now boarding flight 113 to New York City. All passengers in first class are asked to please board the plane now. Paul is sweating bullets. His eyes are bulging out of his head as he tries to stay calm. DISSOLVE TO: DREAM SEQUENCE - INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - DAY MAN (O.S.) We're not gonna make it! Pull up you stupid son of a b***h! The ground rushes forward at breakneck speed. END DREAM SEQUENCE. INT. LAX - TERMINAL - DAY Paul opens his eyes wide. PAUL OK, that's enough excitement for one day. He calmly grabs his suitcase and begins to walk away from the departure lounge. As he turns the corner, Allison literally runs into him, falling to the ground from the impact. ALLISON Jesus, a*****e, watch where you're going! PAUL Al? What are you doing here? Paul extends a hand to Allison and helps her to her feet. ALLISON Paul? Sorry man, I was coming to say goodbye. I just heard from Cliff that you're flying out. What gives? PAUL It's a bit of a long story. I kind of know the pilot and he invited me along. Allison gives Paul a confused stare. PAUL (CONT'D) Just an old friend. From school. ALLISON Wow, I'm surprised you know someone from school that made anything of themselves. At my last high school reunion, I actually had the best job out of anyone there. Unless you count the meth dealer. Son of a b***h was driving a BMW. PAUL I didn't mean high school. See, the thing is, I used to be a -- STEWARDESS (over the PA) Last call for flight 113 to New York City. ALLISON Hey, isn't that you? PAUL Yeah. Yeah that's me, I better go. Paul glances back nervously. ALLISON Well, get going stupid! I'll be here when you get back. Paul hesitantly smiles and begins to walk back to the departure lounge. As the ticket collector checks his passport, he glances back one last time at Allison, who is smiling back and waving. He waves back, and slowly and very dubiously, makes his way onto the loading bridge. PAUL (to a stewardess on the bridge) Can you do me a favor? Just punch me as hard as you can. Knock me right out, just until we've landed. The stewardess looks confused. INT. AIRPLANE - MOMENTS LATER Paul is sitting stiff as a board next to a large, OVERWEIGHT MAN. With two shaky hands, he buckles his seat belt. The overweight man notices. OVERWEIGHT MAN Let me guess. First time flyin'? Paul smiles nervously at the man. PAUL No, just... a bit jittery, that's all. OVERWEIGHT MAN You want my advice? Eat lots of food, drink lots of coffee and then settle in to the bathroom for a nice relaxin' deuce. Ain't nothin' as nice as pinchin' one off mid flight. An awkward beat. PAUL Thank you for keeping me employed. The overweight man gives Paul a strange look. WILL (over the PA) This is your captain speaking. I'd like to welcome you all to the maiden flight of the 797 CloudSurf, and we hope you enjoy the flight. Once we've levelled off, the seat belt signs will be turned off. For now, though, you better buckle those things up, because s**t's about to get real! Suddenly, the plane lurches forward and begins thundering down the runway. Paul's fingers dig into the arm rest. He closes his eyes and begins to murmur to himself. EXT. LAX - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS The massive plane leaves the ground and begins to ascend into the sky. INT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS As the plane leaves the ground, Paul grabs the barf bag, which he uses to its full potential. OVERWEIGHT MAN Damn. That's nasty. DISSOLVE TO: INT. AIRPLANE - LATER CLOSE ON SEAT BELT SIGN which DINGS and turns off. BACK TO SCENE Paul is leaning forward with his face in a barf bag. Several other bags litter the floor around him. A young STEWARDESS approaches with the snack tray. She looks concerned for the dying man in front of her. STEWARDESS Is everything OK, sir? Can I get you something to eat? Paul shakes his head, while breathing heavily. OVERWEIGHT MAN Uh, he's gonna need some booze. Can I have the hero sub and a large coffee please? Oh, and where is the nearest restroom located? STEWARDESS Just down the aisle to your right, sir. The overweight man winks at the stewardess. As the stewardess gives the man his food and beverage, the intercom buzzes to life again. WILL (over the PA) This is your captain speaking. I'd like to request the company of the two loveliest stewardesses on board this aircraft. You know who you are. The two busty stewardesses that Will was groping in the terminal both look at each other playfully and make their way to the cockpit. Paul gives them a puzzled look as they disappear from view. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - MOMENTS LATER Will and Steve are each making out with a stewardess. WILL Are you ready to give daddy some sugar? Are you a bad girl? BUSTY STEWARDESS #1 I'm all yours, captain. STEVE What about you sweetheart? Are you ready to put me on autopilot and play with the instruments? BUSTY STEWARDESS #2 Sir, yes sir. Will and Steve fist-bump while continuing to make out with the stewardesses. Will's stewardess begins to climb on Will's lap. Steve notices and glances over. STEVE Hey, be careful there sweetheart. You don't want to touch any of those buttons by accident. WILL Chill out man! These planes pretty much fly themselves. If something's wrong, the thing will beep at me. The stewardess begins to grind on Will's lap. Suddenly, the plane dips due to turbulence and she slips off, banging her head against the instrument panel. She falls to the floor, unconscious. Everyone is dead silent for a beat. Will and Steve begin laughing hysterically. WILL (CONT'D) Wow! Now that was close. I don't normally admit it, but we very nearly killed everyone on board this aircraft. I mean, wow. STEVE That was intense. Maybe we should - The plane suddenly lurches forward. The other stewardess loses her balance and falls to the floor, hitting her head and falling unconscious as well. STEVE (CONT'D) What's happening, captain?! Will frantically flicks several switches. Nothing happens. WILL Something's not right! We're losing altitude quickly! Oh God, I'm not good with stressful situations! STEVE What the hell do you mean you're not good in stressful situations? You're a pilot, you're supposed to be able to handle this! WILL Oh boy... I just need to lie down... just for a bit... sweet dreams. Will loses consciousness and lurches forward to the floor. CABIN Everyone is screaming as the plane begins its unexpected descent. Paul is looking around frantically, his worst fears realized. RESTROOM The overweight man is sitting on the toilet, trying desperately to maintain his balance and pull his pants up. OVERWEIGHT MAN What the hell's going on?! CABIN A stewardess passes Paul as she runs to the cockpit. Paul grabs her by the arm as she passes. PAUL What's going on?! STEWARDESS I don't know sir, please buckle up and hang on to something! STEVE (over the PA) Are there any pilots on board this plane? We need assistance in the cockpit right now! Please hurry! Paul goes wide-eyed and looks around. No one is responding to the co-pilot's request. STEVE (CONT'D) (over the PA) Oh God, I'm just a co-pilot! It's not as cool as it sounds! All I know how to do is talk to ground control and make coffee! HELP ME! Paul unbuckles his seat belt and moves forward to the cockpit door. STEWARDESS Sir, please sit down! PAUL Let me in there, I used to be in flight school! I almost graduated but there was a small incident, so I didn't really get my license, but I was really close to -- STEWARDESS What?! What are you saying?! PAUL I said I'm a pilot! I'm a pilot, now let me in! The stewardess unlocks the cockpit door and lets Paul inside. COCKPIT STEVE Parrish! Can you land this thing?! PAUL Yeah, I've taken some lessons, but I -- STEVE I don't care, help me out here! Paul makes his way to the pilot's seat, navigating around Will's unconscious body. PAUL OK... OK... we need to stabilize the plane! STEVE Thanks professor, I'm so glad you came! PAUL All right... all right, just... give me a second here. Paul scans the dials and gadgets on the instrument panel. His eye catches the view from the cockpit window as the plane breaks through the cloud barrier and the ground appears below. Paul's eyes go wide as he stares at his impending death. His face is white as a ghost. PAUL (CONT'D) The auto-pilot... it's set to... the wrong... altitude... Paul blacks out and falls to the floor beside Will. CUT TO BLACK. INT. UCLA MEDICAL CENTER - DAY PAUL'S POV The room is one giant blur. The vague shape of a DOCTOR with grey hair and white scrubs is waving a flashlight across Paul's eyes. ALLISON (O.S.) Is he gonna be all right? DOCTOR Not to worry, he just has a bump on the head. He should be back on his feet in no time. SYD (O.S.) Dude, you're a goddamn hero! Do you hear me buddy? (beat) Does he need mouth to mouth or something? I'm his best friend, Doc, I'll do whatever it takes. DOCTOR Sir, please! (beat) Sir! Everything slowly comes into focus. Syd's chubby, stubbly face is hovering over Paul's. As Syd opens his mouth to save his friend's life, Paul screams in terror. BACK TO SCENE SYD All right, that's a bit hurtful. PAUL Am I dead? I'm dead aren't I? Allison rushes over and gives Paul a huge hug. ALLISON I'm so glad you're OK. Jesus, we were so worried. PAUL What the hell's going on here you guys? SYD What's going on is you're a hero, buddy! You saved the day! ALLISON Don't you remember? PAUL I thought it was just a dream. The plane... it landed? Everyone's OK? DOCTOR A few folks are a bit banged up, but nothing too serious. I'll leave you folks alone, don't get him too excited, though. He needs some rest. The doctor strides out of the room. PAUL What about the pilot? Did he make it? ALLISON Yeah, I think so. Nobody was hurt is what they keep saying, all thanks to you! Paul Parrish, a man of many talents. When were you gonna tell us about this whole pilot business? PAUL It's not really a big deal, you guys. It was a long time ago... (a beat as Allison and Syd stare at him, looking confused) All right, I took some flying lessons when I was younger, OK? Seriously, it's no big deal. SYD Bullshit, it's not. You're telling me you used to be able to fly? Like a goddamn bird? What the hell happened to you? Did you rape someone? You did, didn't you? You raped someone and now you're doing community service. I always knew there was something off about you! ALLISON Syd, shut the hell up. What happened, Paul? A beat. PAUL It's not something I'm proud of. It was a long time ago... DISSOLVE TO: FLASHBACK - EXT. AIRFIELD - TARMAC - DAY SUPER: "FIFTEEN YEARS EARLIER." PAUL (V.O.) It was fifteen years ago. I'd been training to be a pilot for the past twelve months. It's all I'd ever wanted to do, ever since I was a little boy. A small prop plane is buzzing through the bright summer sky. It begins to descend, its landing gear deploying as it reaches the ground. A much younger Paul is sitting amongst a crowd of men and women on a grassy hill next to the tarmac. The TIRES SCREECH as the plane touches down on the runway. It comes to a complete stop and Will steps out of the plane along with his teacher, DONALD COOPER (60s), a tall thin man with a friendly face. PAUL (V.O.) That's where I first met Will. The crowd breaks out in applause. Will takes a bow and blows kisses at the crowd. DONALD Excellent work, Mankiewicz. Will begins doing a seductive dance, grinding against an invisible pole. He leans down to the ground and begins grinding the pavement. The crowd goes wild, even Paul is laughing. DONALD (CONT'D) For God's sake, man. Will doesn't seem phased, so the teacher kicks Will as he grinds on the pavement. Will takes the hint and walks off the tarmac toward the group of students. DONALD (CONT'D) And now it's time for our MVP. Paul Parrish, get over here son. Paul runs over to Donald excitedly, high-fiving Will on the way. DONALD (CONT'D) In my thirty years teaching this course, I've never seen anyone as gifted as this young man right here. You can all learn a lot from him. Paul, it's gonna break my heart to see you leave this academy, but it's been my pleasure watching you at work. PAUL Thank you, sir. It's been an honor working with you... with all of you. DONALD It's basically a formality at this point, but let's go pass this test and get you that diploma. Paul and Donald board the aircraft. The crowd goes wild. The plane taxis down the runway and takes flight. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - MOMENTS LATER PAUL Now climbing at seventy to eighty knots. Paul fiddles with the instrument panel. PAUL (CONT'D) Power's coming down to 2200 RPM. EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS The plane veers to the left. PAUL (V.O.) Everything was fine... until it was time to land. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - LATER PAUL Pushing forward on the controls and trimming down a bit. Paul is brimming with confidence. He's in his element. Paul fiddles with the controls, checking the various gauges and screens. DONALD Excellent work, now let's turn around and begin our descent. PAUL Starting the descent now, below two thousand feet. EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS The plane veers to the right, turning slowly around back toward the runway. EXT. AIRFIELD - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS The crowd is cheering Paul on. Will is the only one not looking into the sky. He's too preoccupied by the cleavage of the busty girl sitting beside him. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS PAUL Trimming off now so I don't have to hold any pressure. The plane begins to descend, the ground slowly getting closer and closer. DONALD Excellent work, son. A proud smile washes over Paul's face. PAUL Coming down at sixty. Gradual descent. Lowering the landing gear now. Paul presses a button. PAUL (CONT'D) Landing gear deployed, preparing for landing. A GRINDING NOISE. DONALD Something's not right. Pull the landing gear again. Paul pushes the same button again. Another GRINDING NOISE. PAUL I don't know what's happening, it's not deploying! DONALD (speaking into his headset) We appear to have a malfunction on board aircraft 242, landing gear is failing to deploy, please stand by. Paul is frantically mashing the button. The GRINDING NOISE continues. PAUL This can't be happening! Why isn't it deploying?! DONALD Now, don't panic, I'm sure there's a good explanation for this. Just be calm and we'll -- PAUL How can I be calm?! How can I land this plane without the landing gear? DONALD Son, an important part of this job is keeping your cool under pressure, now pull up and we'll attempt the descent again. Control, please come in, we have a malfunction on board this plane. The ground rushes forward at a steady pace. Paul stares forward as the ground rushes up to meet them. DONALD (CONT'D) Parrish, I said pull this plane up! Pull up now and -- aww s**t, brace for landing! EXT. AIRFIELD - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS The plane makes contact with the ground and skids across the runway. Sparks fly. People are screaming. Smoke billows into the sky behind the plane. CUT TO BLACK. END FLASHBACK. INT. UCLA MEDICAL CENTER - DAY Syd and Allison both look horrified. PAUL We were both fine, just a bit banged up. After we landed, it was determined the landing gear was defective. It wasn't my fault. Still... I could never get up the courage to fly again. An awkward beat. PAUL (CONT'D) What? ALLISON Nothing, I just... I don't know if I can look at you the same way after that story. I mean... it's incredible. PAUL Look, it's not something I'm proud of and, honestly, I'd prefer if we could just put all of this business behind us and get back to work. Who's with me? EXT. UCLA MEDICAL CENTER - LATER TOM BROWN (50s), a reporter for the local news, is standing on the front steps of the hospital. A crowd can be seen gathered around to either side of him. He fastens a microphone to his jacket as a voice in the background counts down from three. TOM BROWN This is Tom Brown with Action News 24, reporting live from the UCLA Medical Center, where local hero, Paul Parrish, is recovering after saving the lives of hundreds of people on board American Airlines flight 113. I have a feeling he won't be putting this business behind him for a very long time to come. He's expected to be released any moment -- oh, there he is now! Paul is wheeled out of the front door in a wheelchair by Syd, with Allison at his side. A loud cheer goes out from the crowd. TOM BROWN (CONT'D) Mr. Parrish, Tom Brown of Action News 24, how are you feeling? Paul looks nervous as he glances back and forth between the reporter, the camera, and the crowd of onlookers. TOM BROWN (CONT'D) A man of few words, that's OK. Tell me, what's it like knowing that you saved the lives of all those people? Paul continues scanning back and forth between the crowd and the cameras with a look of fright. SYD Uh, Mr. Parrish has no comment at this time. TOM BROWN And I take it you're his... attorney? Can I get your name? Syd looks surprised at the accusation. He smiles proudly. SYD Yes, that's correct. My name is Syd Peterson, Attorney at Law. That's S-Y-D, P-E -- Allison grabs Syd by the ear with one hand and wheels Paul away with the other. SYD (CONT'D) Owww! Lemme go, you're gonna rip it off! Tom Brown turns back to the camera and shrugs. TOM BROWN Uh, that was local hero, Paul Parrish. Man of few words. Now back to Rachel in the newsroom for her special report on vaginal collagen injections. Is it healthy, and will your man really notice the difference? INT. UCLA MEDICAL CENTER - PARKING GARAGE - MOMENTS LATER Paul is being wheeled through the parking garage. PAUL You guys know I'm OK to walk, right? ALLISON I feel like I don't know anything about you anymore. Paul rolls his eyes. PAUL You guys... I was going to tell you eventually, it's just -- A seemingly endless black limo pulls up in front of the three friends and stops to block their path. SYD Hey psycho, we're walking here! A tall man with a full head of dark, wavy hair and a tan so perfect it has to be fake steps out of the limo. His tailored suit screams, "I'm better than you". He is ALBERT WESTON (40s), president and CEO of American Airlines. SYD (CONT'D) Are you deaf or just stupid, man? Move it! Albert smiles at Syd. Paul, recognizing the man instantly, rises quickly from his chair. PAUL Mr. Weston. It is an absolute honor, sir. ALBERT Please, the pleasure is all mine, Mr. Parrish. May I call you Paul? PAUL (nervously) Please, yes, call me that. That's my name, my first one. SYD (O.S.) Fine, you asked for it! Paul's WHEELCHAIR comes flying INTO FRAME and SMASHES against the side of the limo. PAUL Syd! Jesus Christ, do you have any idea who this is? SYD Some suit dummy who's about to get his a*s kicked if he doesn't move his big, black, dick of a car! Albert steps forward toward Syd. Syd takes a defensive pose, fists firmly in front of his face. Albert extends his hand. ALBERT I'm Albert Weston, President and CEO of American Airlines. Your friend here is quite the hero. SYD Albert... WESTON. Right! I thought you were... someone else who... Syd takes off like a bolt of lightning, nearly trips, but recovers and continues running awkwardly into the distance. Paul runs his hands over his face in embarrassment. PAUL I'm sorry, he's... a special guy. ALBERT Don't be. You have loyal friends, Paul. It's good to know you can trust the people around you. PAUL (motioning to the limo) I'm pretty sure that'll come out with a little Turtle Wax... ALBERT Don't worry about that, I have ten of these things. This one's my least favorite. Paul, I'm glad I caught up to you before you left, I just wanted to personally congratulate you and thank you for what you've done today. It was truly remarkable how you sprang into action. PAUL Anyone would have done the same thing, it's really not that big of a deal. ALBERT (to Allison) And humble, too! My goodness, he's quite the catch. You're a very lucky girl. ALLISON (awkwardly) Oh, I'm not his girlfriend. Just a work buddy. Juuuuust buddies. Allison shrugs awkwardly, blushing. WILL (O.S.) There he is! Paul turns to look as Will hobbles toward him, cane in hand and bandage on head. WILL (CONT'D) Wasted talent. That's what I said to you this morning and goddamn, did I ever mean it! You saved my life, brother. Will leans forward and gives Paul a bear hug. PAUL Hey, I'm just glad you're OK. How are you feeling? WILL Better now that I'm back on the ground. That Titanic with wings nearly killed us all. It clearly wasn't ready for public use. You'll back me on that, right? Will glances past Paul and notices Albert. WILL (CONT'D) Mr. Weston. Sir, it's nice to see you again. Will and Albert shake hands. ALBERT Likewise. I'm sorry to hear about your troubles today, Captain. Rest assured, we will be conducting a full investigation of what happened on board that flight. WILL Oh, that's good. Really, though, I think it was just the cabin pressure or something. I'd start there. No need to look any further than that. ALBERT Yes, well... in the meantime, I think it would be in the best interest of us all to celebrate the man of the hour. I'd like to hold a press conference today, if possible, and I'd like you both there. What do you say? PAUL Oh, I'm not really sure -- ALLISON He'll do it! Paul turns around. Allison smiles brightly, giving him two thumbs up. Paul smiles nervously at Albert. PAUL I guess that's a yes. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - LATER A maintenance hangar, unusually devoid of employees. Lavatory vehicles sit unattended. Cliff walks into the hangar, looking more stressed than usual. CLIFF (echoing) HEY! He looks around the empty hangar, confused. CLIFF (CONT'D) Where the hell is everyone? Ted walks in from outside, wearing his orange vest and jumpsuit, his phone out in front of his face. CLIFF (CONT'D) What the hell's going on here? I have four planes out there that need to be drained, where is everyone? TED Out saving lives, Captain. (points to his phone) Parrish is on TV, you wanna watch? CLIFF Good for him, where's everyone else? Ted shrugs. CLIFF (CONT'D) Well, you're here, what the hell are you doing? TED On my break, Chief. Still got thirteen minutes left. Legally, I don't even have to be having this conversation with you right now. However, I will humor you because... I like you. There, I said it. Cliff looks as though he's about to blow a gasket. He suddenly clutches at his side in pain. CLIFF Ted, I swear to God... I'm naming this ulcer after you. Cliff limps away angrily. Ted shrugs nonchalantly and focuses his attention back to his phone. CLOSE ON PHONE Paul is seen on the screen, smiling nervously. EXT. UCLA MEDICAL CENTER - CONTINUOUS Paul and Will are standing to either side of Albert Weston on the front steps of the hospital. ALBERT If it wasn't for the actions of this man, this brave and selfless man... well, I can't bear to even think of what might have happened. (beat) History is full of inspiring underdog stories. Joan of Arc at the Siege of Orleans. Goliath, defeated at the hands of David. That movie with Sandra Bullock and the black kid. I forget what it was called, but it was good. Albert turns to Paul. ALBERT (CONT'D) But not as good as what this young man accomplished today. This sanitation worker, with seemingly nothing going for him... Paul looks slightly offended. PAUL (quietly) Come on... ALBERT ... saved the lives of hundreds of American Airlines passengers. And for that, we salute him. Albert and Will both salute Paul. WILL We love you, Paul! ALBERT Yes, we do. We do love you. Which is why I want to officially extend my hand to you in thanks, as well as offer you something. Albert turns to the news camera in front of him. ALBERT (CONT'D) It's come to my attention that this young man once dreamed of being a pilot. I want to make that dream a reality. Albert turns to Paul. ALBERT (CONT'D) That's why American Airlines has offered to put you through flight school. Three months of rigorous flight training, to prepare you for a life in the sky. What do you say, Paul? Paul looks stunned. He looks away from Albert and scans the crowd of onlookers. Cheers and admiration practically ooze from the crowd. Allison and Syd are smiling and clapping. Albert extends a hand. Paul reluctantly shakes it. The crowd goes wild. CUT TO BLACK. INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - CLASSROOM - DAY TOM BRADLEY (30s), a man of average height with a doughy physique and a full head of curly black hair is standing at the front of a classroom full of students. On a whiteboard is drawn a crude image of a plane with various lines and angles through it. TOM BRADLEY Now, your angle of attack is the angle between your wing core line and your relative wing. Tom draws yet another line through the plane. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Now I can NOT stress enough how important it is to know the difference between your angle of attack and your angle of incidence. Tom draws the angle of incidence. The image of the plane is now just a confusing mess of lines, more resembling a pin cushion than an airplane. FRANKLIN (30s), a very confused student with a thin build, stares forward, his mouth ajar. TOM BRADLEY (O.S.) (CONT'D) Does everyone see how I got that? CHASE COOPER (20s), a smug looking man with a very punchable face raises his hand. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) What is it, Chase? CHASE (pointing) What's that line there mean? TOM BRADLEY (pointing to a line) Which line? This line? CHASE No, no, the other one. TOM BRADLEY (pointing to a different line) This one? CHASE No, the smaller one. Tom studies the board carefully, looking confused. TOM BRADLEY (facing the whiteboard) You're f*****g with me again, aren't you? Chase snickers to himself and nudges the person sitting next to him. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) I really don't need this s**t. I used to fly reconnaissance during Iraqi Freedom for God's sake! I was an important person! Chase makes a fart noise with his hand. CLOSE ON TOM'S FACE A single tear. The CREAK of a DOOR. BACK TO SCENE The entire class turns around at once as if all of their heads were being pulled by a single piece of string. Paul is standing at the back of the room, backpack slung over one shoulder. One student begins applauding, followed by the others in a slow rhythm until nearly the entire class is applauding with jubilation. Chase rolls his eyes and gives a single sarcastic clap. MICHELLE GARCIA (30s), an attractive girl with dark curly hair and devilishly good looks gives Paul an approving glance. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Mr. Parrish! Please, come in, have a seat. Tom rushes over and shakes Paul's hand as he's finding his seat at the back of the class. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) As you all know, Paul here was the one responsible for preventing the crash of flight 113. Paul, you're quite the hero around these parts. And a good looking hero, too, oh my. How much do you bench, bro? One eighty? Two hundred? PAUL Uhh... I don't really -- TOM BRADLEY Never mind, we can talk about that later. Are you sure you don't want to sit closer to the front? I can make one of them move, they don't understand what I'm talking about anyway. Franklin nods in agreement. PAUL No, no, that's OK. I'll just sit back here, that's fine. Paul studies the whiteboard carefully. PAUL (CONT'D) Hey, are we doing the angle of attack? Have you talked about the angle of incidence yet? Tom beams with pride in his new student. TOM BRADLEY (voice cracking) Yes, we just -- Tom clears his throat. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Yes, that's exactly what we're talking about. Class, I want you pay attention to Mr. Parrish during his time here. I have the feeling great things are destined for him. Show him the same respect you'd show me. A FART NOISE from O.S. DISSOLVE TO: INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - CLASSROOM - LATER The whiteboard is now filled with drawings of planes, angles and mathematical equations. Not a shred of white space remains. TOM BRADLEY And so the Longitudinal Axis is calculated as such. And that concludes today's lesson. I need a drink. See you tomorrow. Tom is the first out of the room as the students begin filing out after him. Michelle walks up to Paul as he's packing up his things. MICHELLE Hey, fly boy. Sounds like you really know your stuff. PAUL Hey, thanks. I'm afraid I can't take too much credit, though. I've gone through this course before. MICHELLE Sounds like you have a story to tell. (beat) I'm Michelle Garcia (Michelle extends her hand and Paul shakes it) Nice to meet you. PAUL Paul Parrish. MICHELLE A few of us are headed out for drinks, you wanna tag along? PAUL Yeah, sure, that sounds great. MICHELLE All right, cool. Flannigan's over on Ramona. See you there. As Michelle walks away, Paul glances at her a*s. CHASE (O.S.) Enjoying the view? PAUL (distracted by the view) What's that? Paul looks to his right to find Chase looming over him. CHASE Just watch yourself, "hero". It takes more than a little bit of luck to make a pilot. I have the feeling you'll be figuring that out pretty soon. Chase walks away, leaving Paul as the last student in the room. Paul walks up to the whiteboard and stares at the equations, smiling. His smile turns to a nervous frown as his glance moves to the drawing of a plane. CLOSE ON DRAWING OF PLANE Its nose is pointed down, landing gear extended. EXT. FLANNIGAN'S BAR - ESTABLISHING SHOT - LATER Your typical Irish bar with a four-leaf clover logo. Not very original, but they rarely are. INT. FLANNIGAN'S BAR - CONTINUOUS DOORWAY Paul enters the bar, surveying the territory. What a dive. It looked better on the outside. A paper airplane flies into the side of Paul's head. He flinches. MICHELLE (O.S.) Over here, ace. Michelle has a smirk on her face. A bunch of people from class are gathered around her at the table, talking noisily. INT. FLANNIGAN'S BAR - MOMENTS LATER Paul is seated at the table across from Michelle. Seven others from class are there as well, leaning in to listen to Paul's story. Chase is seated at the end of the table. He nudges the guy next to him and points to Paul, snickering. PAUL So, everyone around me is just screaming, I can't even hear myself think, and the co-pilot, he's asking if anyone on board knows how to fly a plane. MICHELLE Holy s**t, man, that's insane. And you just sprung into action, huh? PAUL Well, you know. It's in my blood I guess, I don't know. MICHELLE You've got balls man, I'll give you that. Paul shrugs. PAUL It's nothing anyone else wouldn't do if they were about to smash into the ground at five hundred miles an hour. Franklin looks absolutely amazed by the story. FRANKLIN So you know how to fly a plane. What are you doing here, man? Shouldn't you be out there gettin' it done? PAUL Well, it's kind of complicated, I'm -- CHASE (O.S.) Full of s**t? The room becomes dead silent. Everyone turns to look at Chase. Chase stands up and walks over to Paul. CHASE (CONT'D) What, were you gonna say something? You know what this guy does for a living? He empties toilets. Yeah, that's right. And you know why? MICHELLE Chase, don't be such an a*****e. CHASE Because he's not a pilot and he never will be. Let me ask you something, does the name Donald Cooper mean anything to you? Paul's face is now as red as a fire truck. He stares solemnly at the table in front of him. CHASE (CONT'D) He was your flight instructor fifteen years ago, wasn't he? He also happens to be my uncle. You nearly killed him back then, did you forget to include that part in your little story? The poor guy's been terrified of flying ever since. I went on a trip to Italy with him last year and we had to take a boat. Do you have any idea how long that takes? No, of course you don't. Because no one f*****g does that! (beat) Next time you go passing yourself off as a hero, you might wanna think about where you come from. Come on guys, let's leave the hero to his little story time. Chase and three of his friends walk away from the table. One of them, JAKE (30s), a severely overweight man who seems one Twinkie away from bursting, pauses for a moment. JAKE Next time I fly, I'll be sure to get the extra large bean burrito, just for you, toilet man. MICHELLE F**k off, Stay Puft. As if everything you eat isn't extra large. JAKE Hey, this is glandular. I'm a vegetarian. Words hurt. Jake walks away to join his friends as they all leave the bar. FRANKLIN Man, what a dick. Paul's stare is locked on the beer in front of him. His eyes quickly dart up to glance at his two friends. A very awkward beat. EXT. FLANNIGAN'S BAR - EVENING The main door of Flannigan's. An extremely inebriated man is puking his guts out against the wall. Paul, Michelle and Franklin exit through the front of the building, stumbling a bit as they go. FRANKLIN I'm just saying, if I had to get high with anyone, it would be Goldblum. MICHELLE Are you serious right now? FRANKLIN Am I serious? Have you seen Jurassic Park? (doing a Goldblum impression) You two dig up, dig up dinosaurs? Har har har harrrrr ha ha! Paul doubles over in laughter. FRANKLIN (CONT'D) Now, imagine that in real life. And high. PAUL (imitating Goldblum) You do plan to have dinosaurs on your dinosaur tour, right? FRANKLIN Yes! My man knows what I'm talking about. The trio approach two cabs parked at the curb. FRANKLIN (CONT'D) All right you two, peace! Paul, pleasure meeting you, dude. You're a goddamn hero, I don't care what anyone says! Franklin gets in the cab and smiles drunkenly at the cab driver. FRANKLIN (CONT'D) (to the cab driver) Do you know where I live? Michelle leans her head into the cab. MICHELLE (to the cab driver) West Lincoln and Montebello. The driver nods and the cab speeds away. FRANKLIN (O.S.) (imitating Goldblum yet again) Must go faster! Paul and Michelle stumble toward the second cab. MICHELLE Hey, I hope that a*****e didn't ruffle your feathers too bad today. He's that s****y alpha male stereotype. He sees someone like you come along and all of a sudden he's got competition. PAUL Yeah, well, he wasn't totally wrong. It's true, I couldn't hack it as a pilot. Ever since my accident... (beat) Hey, can I tell you something? Michelle nods. PAUL (CONT'D) I don't know what I'm doing here. MICHELLE Getting s**t-faced, what else? PAUL No, no, I mean, here with you guys. I don't belong here. I had my shot and I blew it. MICHELLE Maybe so. But you're gonna give it another shot. You know why? Paul shakes his head. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Because I think this is the only thing you've ever wanted to do. And there's nothing more important than that. Get some rest, fly boy. I'll see you in class tomorrow. Paul nods and smiles, a look of renewed energy in his eyes. Paul gets into the nearest cab. He glances back at Michelle, who's hailing another cab. He smiles as the cab pulls away. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - TARMAC - MORNING The tarmac is illuminated by the morning sun. Two dozens students are standing around their instructor at the edge of the tarmac. TOM BRADLEY All right, listen up, folks. Today we're gonna be flying at four thousand feet. I will have full control over the aircraft for our first time out. Paul has a concerned look on his face. PAUL'S POV The small puddle jumper on the runway behind Tom is all Paul can focus on. A LOUD RINGING in Paul's own mind drowns out the words of the instructor. The plane has become Paul's entire universe. Those twin propellers look as ominous as a vacuum does to a dog. BACK TO SCENE Michelle, who is standing beside Paul, notices his pained expression and gives him a slight nudge with her elbow. The ringing noise stops. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Mr. Parrish? Are you still with us? PAUL Uh... yeah! Sorry. Several students erupt in laughter. CHASE Guy can't even look at the plane without shitting himself. At least he knows how to clean it up after. TOM BRADLEY Shut your face hole, Cooper! You'll be lucky if you're not scrubbing urinals a year from now. Parrish, come with me. You're up first. Michelle puts a hand on Paul's shoulder as he takes one step forward. MICHELLE Live the dream, man. Paul nods and walks toward the small plane. TOM BRADLEY You'll probably be teaching me a thing or two up there, am I right? Hey, I like that shirt. Abercrombie? PAUL Uh... yeah, I think so. TOM BRADLEY It's a good look on you. (awkward beat) Anyway. Let's go spank some clouds, what do you say, bro? Paul gives Tom an uncomfortable glance as they load into the aircraft. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - MOMENTS LATER Paul and Tom are seated side by side in the aircraft, Paul in the pilot's seat and Tom in the co-pilot's. TOM BRADLEY OK, we're gonna turn left and taxi down nice and slow. Tom turns the wheel and the plane moves to the left. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) No ring? PAUL Pardon me? TOM BRADLEY I just noticed you're not married. Surprising, I guess... PAUL No, what does that have to do with - TOM BRADLEY I'm not gay. If that's what you're thinking. I'm just making conversation. This is just friendly conversation between two grown men. Don't make it into something it's not. PAUL I didn't say you were, I just -- can we just focus on what we're doing here? TOM BRADLEY All right, I want you to watch your speed, once we get to fifty-five knots, you're gonna pull up and we'll be in the air. Remember what I said back there about how I'd have full control? The plane accelerates quickly. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) That was just for those sissies. Let's see you take us up. Tom lets go of the controls. PAUL What?! I can't do this myself! CLOSE ON ACCELEROMETER The speed moves past fifty, approaching fifty-five. BACK TO SCENE TOM BRADLEY Don't be so modest. All right, you're at fifty-five, let's do it. The end of the runway rushes toward them. Paul closes his eyes tight and pulls down slowly on the control column. The nose of the plane begins to point up. EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS The wheels of the plane leave the pavement. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS Paul opens his eyes. His look of fright slowly turns into a huge smile. TOM BRADLEY And we're airborne. Congratulations, Mr. Parrish. We're gonna make a pilot out of you yet. I'll take over from here, don't want you getting too full of yourself. PAUL (giddy) I can't believe I just did that! I didn't even hesitate, I mean... it all just came back to me! (beat) I'm never emptying another goddamn toilet ever again! TOM BRADLEY You're goddamn right, you sexy son of a b***h. EXT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - ESTABLISHING SHOT - MORNING Maintenance vehicles whiz across the tarmac. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - CONTINUOUS A maintenance vehicle comes speeding into the hangar. Paul's replacement, JEAN (50s), a large, overweight man with a terrible comb-over, walks in front of the truck, carrying a large hose. The driver of the vehicle lays on the HORN, producing a screeching HONK. He slams on the brakes, inches away from the fat man's face. Syd hops out of the vehicle. SYD Jean, what the hell's going on? Watch where you're walking! JEAN Geez, I'm sorry, I didn't think anyone would be driving through here. I'm still getting the hang of how things work around here. SYD Jean. Listen. You're a good guy. I like having you around, we all do. But I'm gonna give it to you straight. You're so s****y compared to the last guy that worked here, so do yourself a favor and -- Cliff, dressed in his usual wrinkled business attire, walks up to the two men. He looks as stressed out as always, shaking his head and mumbling to himself. SYD (CONT'D) ... Keep up the great work! Were you gonna reattach that hose, or... were you gonna... what are you doing with that? CLIFF Everything OK over here? Is he showing you the ropes? JEAN Yes sir, everyone's been really great, I think I'm really starting to get a hang of -- Jean drops the HOSE he's carrying. It CRASHES down against the cement floor. Cliff rolls his eyes at Syd. CLIFF Hey Jean, why don't you just leave that there. Isn't it time for your coffee break? JEAN Oh, that's all right, I'd rather just work hard and get the hang of things if that's OK with -- CLIFF Go get a coffee or you're fired. Jean looks confused, but scurries away all the same. CLIFF (CONT'D) Listen, I know he's no Paul, but he's the only one that applied for the position. For some reason, no one wants the job. How's your boyfriend doin' anyway? If you see him, tell him to get his a*s back here. SYD Aww, you miss him, don't you? CLIFF No. I don't miss him. I don't even like him. But he's a hell of a lot better than that fat b*****d. (Cliff points to Jean) What the hell's he doing? Jean is clipping his nails. One of the nail clippings goes flying and hits Allison in the eye. ALLISON Oh for f**k's sake! CLIFF You miss him. EXT. LAX - TARMAC/INT. MAINTENANCE VEHICLE - LATER Syd and Allison are sitting in a maintenance vehicle as Syd drives it down the tarmac toward a docked plane. ALLISON It's just not the same around here, you know? It's like something's missing. SYD So has he boned you yet, or what? Allison smacks Syd on the side of the head. ALLISON Boned me? Nice, Syd. He's my friend and I miss him, OK? Don't you miss having him around? SYD Of course I miss the little guy. I'd kill to have him back here, but it's not gonna happen. He's moved on to bigger and better things. ALLISON I was gonna go down and surprise him today at lunch, you wanna come along? SYD You're so horny for him. I can actually SEE the estrogen oozing from your pores. Syd swipes at the air. SYD (CONT'D) Get it away from me! Poison! ALLISON Why are you such a pig? Can you answer that? Besides, I don't think I'm his type. (beat) Has he ever mentioned me? Syd slams on the brakes and the vehicle comes to a sudden stop. SYD All right, that's enough. Out you go. ALLISON (smiling) He did say something, didn't he? SYD Goodbye! Syd leans over to close the door as Allison gets out. ALLISON Are we still on for lunch? The maintenance vehicle zooms away and nearly collides with another vehicle, which is swerving all over the road. Syd lays on the HORN. SYD (O.S.) Goddamnit, Jean! INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - CLASSROOM - LATER TOM BRADLEY So if your aircraft is burning 10.8 gallons per hour and you fly for five hours and ten minutes, how much fuel are you burning? Tom scans the students, looking for an answer. One guy is using his fingers to count. He runs out of fingers and takes off a shoe to count his toes. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Come on, this isn't a trick question. Paul has his hand up. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Anyone besides Mr. Parrish, for once? Franklin reluctantly raises his hand. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Yes? FRANKLIN Are we talkin' metric gallons or imperial gallons? 'Cause that's gonna make a huge difference. Tom rubs his face with his hands. TOM BRADLEY Paul. PAUL That would be 55.7999 gallons, but like you said, with fuel we always round up to be safe. So, fifty-six gallons. TOM BRADLEY Exactly. Fifty-six. Thank you, Paul. Hey, somebody's having a good hair day today. I like the look, bro. Paul gives Tom an uncomfortable look. An awkward beat. Tom coughs and writes "56" on the board. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) I assume none of you see how he got that, so let's take a fifteen minute break while we all contemplate other career opportunities. INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - HALLWAY - LATER Students are filing out of the classroom one by one. Chase heads down the hallway to the restroom. As he enters, a TALL MAN wearing a baseball cap comes INTO FRAME. All we can see of him is the back of his head. INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - RESTROOM - MOMENTS LATER Chase is standing at a urinal doing his business. The tall man, now revealed to also be wearing aviator glasses, walks up next to him, unzips and begins to relieve himself, despite the fact that there are five other urinals currently unoccupied. CHASE Hey dick cheese, do you mind? TALL MAN You don't know who I am, but just listen for a second. Chase looks confused. TALL MAN (CONT'D) What do you think about Paul Parrish? CHASE Parrish? The guy's a prick. He had one lucky moment and now everyone's treating him like he's some sort of hero. TALL MAN Not to mention, he almost killed your uncle. That poor b*****d. A beat. CHASE Who the hell are you? The man turns to Chase and takes off his glasses and we see that the man is actually Will. The SOUND of URINE splashing against fabric. CHASE (CONT'D) What the f**k?! Put a cork in it! WILL (embarrassed) Sorry. Will zips up his pants. CHASE Hey, you're that pilot. The s****y one that almost killed all those people. WILL Well, I don't know about that, there's many angles to it that people don't usually take into account. I mean, the air pressure in that cabin was WAY off the charts, there's no way -- CHASE You've got me confused for someone that gives a s**t. I saw you two on TV. Looked to me like you were best buds. What gives? WILL Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. That's a saying I invented for situations like this. That little s**t has been one upping me all my life, ever since we met. In class, he was always one step ahead of me, always the favorite. And now... look who's the hero of the century. It took me fifteen years to get where I am and he's taken it all away in a matter of days. CHASE What are you saying? WILL I think it's time that Mr. Parrish had an unfortunate accident. One that would ensure he never sets foot in this place ever again. Chase flashes a devilish smile. Will puts his hand on Chase's shoulder and the two men laugh maniacally. One of the students comes into the washroom at just the wrong moment to see the two men, touching each other and laughing, one of them still with his member in his hand. The student, with a horrified look on his face, slowly backs away and exits the restroom. INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - CLASSROOM - LATER Circles are drawn on the whiteboard with arrows flowing around them. TOM BRADLEY So, this right here, when you get this spinning effect where the ball curves away from the principal flight path, this is known as the Magnus effect. Tom turns around to see Jake raising his chubby hand. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Yes! A question. I'm so excited. Again, I encourage you folks to be engaged. What is it, Jake? JAKE I'm hungry. Can we go for lunch now? Tom lets out a heavy sigh. TOM BRADLEY Sure, why not? I suppose slamming down a McRib is just as important as learning how not to crash a plane. JAKE The McRib is seasonal, sir. TOM BRADLEY (under his breath) Just like your metabolism. (loudly) All right, let's meet back in one hour! Paul is packing up his books when Michelle and Franklin walk up to him. MICHELLE Hey, you feel like grabbing a bite? There's a new pilot bar just around the corner I've been dying to try, whaddya say? PAUL Sure, sounds good! There's a TAPPING sound on the GLASS window of the door. Paul turns to find Syd's face pressed up against the window, making a ridiculous face. Paul shakes his head and chuckles to himself. FRANKLIN Who the hell's that idiot? INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - HALLWAY - MOMENTS LATER The students begin filing out of the classroom. Paul exits the classroom and approaches Syd and Allison, who shower him in hugs. ALLISON Surprise! We know you're probably really busy, but we just wanted to come by and see how things are going! SYD We hadn't heard from you in a while, man. Just wanted to make sure you hadn't fallen off the face of the earth. PAUL Sorry, it's been kind of crazy the last little while. I've sort of been lost in my studies, I guess. I'm really trying to do it right this time. ALLISON That's fantastic. You get a lunch break around here? You wanna grab a bite with us? We were thinking about trying that burger joint around the corner. PAUL Uh, yeah, that sounds great but... I sort of already made plans. SYD Oh that's cool, buddy. Where we goin'? PAUL Well, the thing is, it's sort of a... pilot's-only place. SYD Oh, what, like Stripes? Who cares man, they let anyone in. They don't care. Besides, who's more important than me? Paul laughs awkwardly. PAUL Yeah, well... that's a good point. Maybe some other time, though? Chase, Jake and the rest of his posse exit the class. SYD What, are you serious? Do you want us to sit at a different table, or - CHASE What do we have here, Parrish? Don't tell me you called in the pit crew to clean up the place? ALLISON Pit crew? What the hell is that supposed to mean? Is that supposed to be some sort of jab at what we do for a living? CHASE Oh yeah, actually, now that you mention it, I think one of the stalls in the men's room is backed up. Hey sweetheart, would you mind going in there and taking care of it? Make sure you wear heavy gloves though... smells pretty nasty. Chase snickers to his buddies as they walk down the hallway. ALLISON Go to hell, a*****e! Jesus, who is that guy? What the hell's his problem? PAUL I'm sorry about that, you guys... he's got it out for me. It's a bit of a long story... SYD Nobody talks to my friends that way! I'm gonna go kick his a*s! (beat) Actually, he was a pretty big guy... (beat) WE'RE gonna kick his a*s! Come on, Paul! MICHELLE (O.S.) You comin', fly boy? Michelle and Franklin are waiting at the end of the hallway for Paul. PAUL I'm sorry guys. I gotta run. Let's get together, some other time, OK? SYD So, we're just supposed to fend for ourselves now, is that it? You're too cool to hang out with us? PAUL I'm sorry. Paul hesitantly walks down the hallway to join his new friends. SYD Well, enjoy your fancy pilot food, you traitor! I hope you choke on it! Paul glances quickly over his shoulder before disappearing from view. INT. PILOT BAR - LATER Paul, Michelle and Franklin are all seated at a booth. Michelle and Franklin are eating hungrily. Paul is on another planet, lost in thought. MICHELLE You OK, sport? You haven't even touched your Chicken Fried Chicken Fried Chicken. FRANKLIN The extra "Chicken Fried" makes all the difference, man. That's four thousand calories you won't soon forget. PAUL Yeah, no, I'm fine. Paul takes a bite. His eyes open wide in chicken euphoria. PAUL (CONT'D) Wow. That's amazing. MICHELLE Told you. Paul stares into space again. He's in his own little world. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Seriously, what's eating you? PAUL You ever feel like you don't know where you belong? Like you're just... out of place? FRANKLIN You mean like when your girl takes you into the lingerie section at Macy's? Because that s**t makes me super uncomfortable. PAUL Not exactly. MICHELLE Listen, you've made mistakes in your life, we all have. Doesn't mean you don't deserve a second chance. I mean, do you really wanna be emptying toilets for the rest of your life? You're a pilot, same as us. We were born to do this, it's in our blood. PAUL I know you think so, but I'm not so sure. MICHELLE Well, there's the door. (Michelle points) No one's holding a gun to your head. Paul looks taken aback by Michelle's honesty. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Listen. The past is the past. Leave it where it belongs. Stop moping and get on with your life. Be a man. PAUL You're right. Yeah, you're absolutely right. I need to just... move on! I was way too comfortable with just being a nothing my whole life. No more! Paul slams his fists down on the table, causing everything to rattle. FRANKLIN Yeah, man! I like the attitude. Always look forward, the past is the past... all that s**t. I gotta go take a leak. MICHELLE (to Franklin) That was so beautiful. You're a poet. Paul laughs and takes a swig of his beer. Paul and Michelle share an awkward moment of silence. MICHELLE (CONT'D) So, what's your situation? Paul looks confused by the question. PAUL My situation? What do you mean? MICHELLE What do you think I mean? Are you single? Married? Five times divorced with sixteen kids? PAUL Yeah, totally, I have a whole house full of kids. There's so many I can't even keep track of them all. MICHELLE That's funny and all, but I can't tell if you're joking. PAUL Oh... no, I'm single. MICHELLE Really? What about that girl that came to see you today? I sort of though that maybe you two... PAUL Her? I used to work with her. I think she's always had a thing for me, but... MICHELLE But? PAUL Well, I mean... she's a great girl. Smart, funny, kind of cute... but she's not very ambitious. I don't think I could ever be with someone that does... MICHELLE What you used to do? Paul shrugs. PAUL The past is the past, right? MICHELLE So why don't you ask me out, then? PAUL Are you serious? Michelle shrugs. PAUL (CONT'D) Sorry, I just... yeah, sure. Why not? MICHELLE Pick me up tonight around eight? PAUL I'll be there. Paul takes a long, nervous sip of beer. Some of it spills onto his shirt. Michelle tosses some napkins at him. MICHELLE Yeah, hard to believe you're single. EXT. MICHELLE'S HOUSE - ESTABLISHING SHOT - EVENING A pleasant, two-story duplex. The DING DONG of a DOORBELL. FRONT PORCH Paul is standing at the front door, awkwardly rocking back and forth. The door opens to reveal Michelle, looking absolutely stunning in a red shoulder-less dress. PAUL Wow... you look... different. Sorry, that sounds bad. I mean you look great. But different than usual. MICHELLE Oh man, shut up. I get dressed up like this once or twice a year and it's never fun. Consider yourself lucky. Michelle locks the front door and the two of them walk toward Paul's s****y '92 Ford Taurus. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Nice car. It's... different. EXT. LE ORANGERIE RESTAURANT - ESTABLISHING SHOT - LATER A very modern-looking building situated on a busy Los Angeles street. INT. LE ORANGERIE RESTAURANT - CONTINUOUS The classiest restaurant in the city. Every surface shines like a diamond and if there's a spot of dirt in the building, it's doing a good job of hiding. Paul and Michelle are seated across from one another. A WAITER (30s) arrives to the table and smiles at the couple. WAITER (French accent) Good evening and welcome to Le Orangerie. My name is Pierre and I will be your waiter for the evening. Can I start you out with something off of our wine list, a Bordeaux, perhaps? It is our most popular. Paul and Michelle both glance at one another and nod. PAUL Sure, that sounds great. We'll take a bottle. WAITER Très bien. The waiter walks away with his snooty nose held high. MICHELLE (imitating the waiter) A Bordeaux perhaps? Hoh-hoh-hoh! Voulez-vous couchez avec moi ce soir ? Paul laughs. PAUL You know, you just asked him if he wants to sleep with you. MICHELLE How do you know I was talking to him? Paul clears his throat and opens his menu to avoid the awkward moment. MICHELLE (CONT'D) What are you gonna get? CLOSE ON PRICE OF RIB EYE STEAK $73 CLOSE ON PAUL'S WIDE EYES CLOSE ON PRICE OF SEAFOOD FETTUCCINE $49 CLOSE ON PRICE OF CAESAR SALAD $35 BACK TO SCENE Paul suddenly chokes and begins coughing incessantly. MICHELLE (CONT'D) You OK? PAUL (coughing) Yeah, I'm fine. I've just got... something in my... Paul takes a long gulp of water and closes his menu. MICHELLE Did you figure out what you're getting? PAUL You know, I'm not really hungry, I thought I was but just suddenly I remember I had a big lunch. Yeah, so... maybe soup. A nice bowl of soup. What about you? MICHELLE You had no idea how expensive this place was, did you? PAUL Not a goddamn clue. They both laugh. MICHELLE I could tell, you just ordered a $300 bottle of wine without even flinching. PAUL Holy s**t, did I seriously? MICHELLE You wanna dine and dash? PAUL We haven't dined yet. MICHELLE Fine, then let's just DASH! Michelle grabs Paul by the wrist and runs with him through the restaurant. They run by the snooty waiter, who spills the wine all over himself. PAUL (to waiter) I'm so sorry, I don't normally do this! MICHELLE Au revoir, garçon! INT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - LATER A large pizza box lies half-consumed, discarded on the kitchen counter, surrounded by empty beer bottles. BEDROOM Paul and Michelle are making out on the bed. Michelle is on top of him, her legs wrapped around him. PAUL This was a really good idea. MICHELLE Pizza beats fancy French cuisine any day of the week. PAUL Totally. Paul flings the covers up over top of Michelle and they giggle as they roll around underneath them. EXT. PAUL'S APARTMENT/INT. ALLISON'S CAR - MOMENTS LATER Allison is sitting in her car, staring out the window at Paul's apartment building. Suddenly, without warning, her CELL PHONE RINGS. Allison jumps. She answers it. ALLISON Hello? INT. SYD'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS SYD Please tell me you're not where I think you are! INTERCUT telephone conversation. ALLISON I just want to talk to him, I really think this whole thing is just a big misunderstanding. He's not a bad guy, Syd, and... SYD Yeah, yeah. I know. You wanna jump his bones, even though he'd sooner forget we even exist. ALLISON I know him better than that. He deserves a second chance. A beat. SYD You've got flowers with you, don't you? ALLISON What? Flowers? Come on, how lame do you think I am? A woman giving a guy flowers? SYD Just don't let him off too easy, that's all I'm saying. He totally snubbed us today. Allison hangs up the phone. She leans over to the passenger seat and picks up the bouquet of flowers. She throws them behind her and they land on the floor of the car. INT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Paul and Michelle are still going at it. Paul is working at getting her bra off. MICHELLE You can fly a plane, but you can't take off a bra? There's a KNOCK at the DOOR. Both of them suddenly stop and listen. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Who could that be? PAUL Probably just someone selling something. Just ignore it. They begin to kiss again, and again there's another KNOCK at the DOOR. PAUL (CONT'D) Goddamnit. Paul gets up from the bed, throws on his jeans and a t-shirt and makes his way to the front door. FRONT DOOR Another KNOCK. PAUL (CONT'D) Jesus, I'm coming! Whatever you're selling, I can tell you right now that I don't want it! Paul opens the door to find Allison standing in front of him. PAUL (CONT'D) Al. (beat) Hey. What are you doing here? ALLISON I'm sorry for popping in like this, I know it's kind of late... I just sort of felt like I needed to speak with you. In person. PAUL Oh, yeah... sure. Paul looks behind him nervously. ALLISON It's just... the way we left things off earlier was kind of s****y and I felt like we owe it to each other to talk about it. (beat) Because I like you. Paul glances nervously over his shoulder again. PAUL Hey, that's great, Al, do you think we could talk some other time? ALLISON Did you even hear what I said? What's so important that we can't talk about this now? MICHELLE (O.S.) Come on, fly boy! Hurry back, I'm waiting! An awkward beat as Paul and Allison stare at each other. ALLISON Never mind. This was a really terrible idea. Allison turns and walks quickly down the hallway. PAUL Hey, Allison, no, come back! Paul runs after her, but she picks up her pace and runs down the stairwell. STAIRWELL Allison scurries down the stairs as fast as she can. Paul is hot on her heels, taking them two at a time. PAUL (CONT'D) Come on, don't do this! I didn't know you were coming over! EXT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - MOMENTS LATER Allison runs to her car and gets inside. Paul is right behind her. She starts the engine as Paul reaches the car. PAUL I'm so sorry! Can we please talk? Allison rolls down the window. ALLISON Why don't you just come out and say it? You're ashamed to have me as a friend. I'm right, aren't I? PAUL No, that's not it at all, Al. You've got it wrong, I'm -- ALLISON You know, when that a*****e was saying all those s****y things to me before, I was waiting for the Paul I used to know to speak up and defend me. To say something in my defense, anything. (beat) A part of me wants to know exactly what you think of me, but I'm pretty sure I already know the answer. (beat) Good luck with school, I'm sure you'll do great. Allison reaches down to the floor behind her seat and picks up the bouquet. She tosses it onto the road, WHEELS SCREECHING as she takes off. ANGLE ON BOUQUET OF FLOWERS Paul stares down at them solemnly. CUT TO BLACK. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - PARKING LOT - MOMENTS LATER A lone car sits in a shadowed area of the parking lot. INT. CHASE'S CAR - CONTINUOUS Chase is sitting in the car, a look of complete boredom on his face. His CELL PHONE RINGS. He quickly answers it. CHASE Hello? Yeah, I'm here. He should be out any minute, he usually locks up around this time. (beat) Don't worry, like I told you, he's always the first in the air. Teacher's pet. Here he comes, I gotta go. Chase hangs up his phone. The door to the building in front of him opens and Tom Bradley exits. He locks the door and then proceeds to scratch his crotch through his jeans. Not satisfied, he sticks his hands down his pants and goes to town. Chase looks horrified. CHASE (CONT'D) Son of a b***h must have crabs. Tom finishes his scratch and walks toward the small prop plane positioned on the runway outside the hangar. Chase quickly and quietly opens his door and closes it behind himself, scurrying quickly over to the building. Chase peers around the corner of the building. Tom is opening the door to the small plane. Chase takes a quick look around and runs across the tarmac. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS Tom brings the plane to life and turns on the lights to illuminate the interior of the empty hangar in front of him. The blurry figure of Chase flits behind the plane in the background. Tom, sensing something, briefly looks over his shoulder. He looks forward again and shrugs, beginning to taxi the plane slowly forward toward the hangar. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - HANGAR - CONTINUOUS Chase follows slowly behind the tail fin of the plane as it taxis into the hangar for the night. INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - HANGAR - CONTINUOUS As the plane comes to a stop, Chase lowers himself to the floor and shimmies directly underneath the small fuselage. The GROAN of a DOOR opening. TOM BRADLEY (O.S.) Stop what you're doing right now! CHASE Chase closes his eyes tight, realizing he's busted. A boot comes INTO FRAME right next to Chase's head. TOM BRADLEY (O.S.) Who do you think you are? Chase and Tom speak at the same time: CHASE Listen, I'm sorry, I -- TOM BRADLEY (O.S.) If you invite your mother over for the weekend, you can forget about getting any sex from me. No sexual intercourse for wife. Tom is listening to his wife yell at him on the other end of the phone call. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) How long? How's two weeks sound? A good old fashioned fortnight. Yeah. That's right, I reserve the right to withhold the penis. (beat) Hey, no, no, no! If I come home and see her car in the driveway, I am going to lose my s**t! (beat) Fine, we'll talk about it later. Love you, baby. Tom hangs up the phone. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Won that one. Chase lets out a sigh of relief. The lights in the hangar suddenly turn off and the DOOR to the hangar GRINDS to a close. Chase positions himself next to the landing gear and produces a torque wrench from his jacket pocket. He proceeds to loosen several of the bolts on each wheel. CHASE No, too many, he'll never make it off the ground. He tightens a few back up for good measure. CHASE (CONT'D) Good luck on your test, a*****e. It's gonna be a bumpy landing. Chase sneezes and his head slams into the fuselage. CHASE (CONT'D) F**k! INT. PAUL'S APARTMENT - BEDROOM - LATER (MOS) Paul is lying in bed, wide awake beside a very naked and very asleep Michelle. He gets out of bed and wanders over to his dresser. He shoves a few papers aside to reveal a framed photo beneath. CLOSE ON PHOTO of Paul, Allison and Syd sitting around a table at The Four Stripes, smiling, beers in hand. BACK TO SCENE Paul stares with sad eyes at the photo for a moment before opening a drawer and placing the framed photo inside. DISSOLVE TO: INT. ALLISON'S APARTMENT - LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS (MOS) Allison is passed out on the couch, dried mascara streaking her cheeks. The glow of the TV that she left on illuminates the large tub of half-eaten ice cream in front of her. DISSOLVE TO: INT. SYD'S HOUSE - BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS (MOS) Syd is lying in bed beside a sleeping, busty blonde woman. He's wearing a pilot's cap. The room is suddenly illuminated by Syd's cell phone, which is sitting on the bedside table. Syd leans over and looks at his phone. "PAUL PARRISH" He taps a button and the room goes dark once again. He rolls back over and spoons the woman lying beside him. He takes off his hat and puts it on her head. DISSOLVE TO: INT. WILL'S HOUSE - DEN - CONTINUOUS (MOS) A richly decorated room. Beautiful mahogany wood, velvet fabrics and rich tapestries abound. A wealthy person lives here. Will is sitting beside a roaring fireplace, holding a tumbler of whisky in one hand. He receives a phone call and answers it. He nods for a moment as the person on the other end talks and then hangs up. Will swirls the whisky around with a look of contemplation in his eyes. He swallows it in one gulp. He grimaces and begins to cough incessantly, realizing that whisky doesn't agree with him. DISSOLVE TO: INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - PARKING LOT/INT. CHASE'S CAR - CONTINUOUS Chase hangs up his phone and gets into his car. He tosses the torque wrench on the seat beside him. He inspects the slight bump on his head in the rear-view mirror and touches it lightly, cringing as he does so. FADE TO BLACK. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - TARMAC - MORNING A large group of students are standing around at the edge of the runway. Tom Bradley is standing in front, giving a speech. TOM BRADLEY Today's a big one, folks. I'm going to be testing the skills we've learned to date, and introducing a new one: the mechanics of a safe landing. Paul is staring forward with a solemn look on his face. Michelle, who is standing beside him, gives him a slight nudge. He turns to her and smiles. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) Mr. Parrish, you're up first. Michelle gives him a pat on the back as he steps forward. MICHELLE Good luck! FRANKLIN You got this, man! Chase says nothing, but instead just smirks. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - MOMENTS LATER Paul, now with a headset on, brings the ENGINE to life with a loud WHIR. He checks various instruments and panels before beginning to taxi down the runway. TOM BRADLEY Good job, don't forget to check your fuel gauge. Just like we talked about. PAUL Fuel looks good. Ready for take off. TOM BRADLEY All right, you're the boss. Let's take 'er up. Paul accelerates quickly and the plane begins to hurtle down the runway at full speed. He pulls back slightly on the control column. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - TARMAC - AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON WHEEL A bolt rattles loose. BACK TO SCENE The plane lifts off the ground into the morning sky. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS Michelle is staring up at the plane as it takes off into the sky. Chase approaches her with a s**t-eating grin on his face. CHASE Your boy toy there is quite the prodigy. Perfect take-off, I have to say. Though, he never did have a problem with that. It was always the landing that gave him trouble. MICHELLE You ever been punched by a girl before? It'd probably be really humiliating with all of these people watching, so do yourself a favor and stop talking. CHASE What's he like in bed, anyway? Does he bring his toilet plunger with him to entice you? Quick as lightning, Michelle clocks him square in the face. Chase falls to the ground as people around him point and laugh. EXT. AIRPLANE - MOMENTS LATER The plane veers to the left in the bright blue sky. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS Tom has a clipboard in front of him. He checks something off. TOM BRADLEY All good so far. Let's take 'er in for a landing. Paul takes a deep breath as he begins to slowly descend toward the runway. He pushes a button on the console. PAUL Landing gear deployed... EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON LANDING GEAR as it deploys from within the fuselage. One of the wheels begins to rattle. Another bolt breaks free and flies away from the wheel. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS The ground is slowly rising up to meet the plane. TOM BRADLEY Excellent work. Ease it in there. Don't rush it. Paul is sweating as he moves the control arm into position. PAUL Are you sure everything's OK? Something feels off. Tom checks the controls on the console. TOM BRADLEY You're fine, don't be nervous. You can do this. Bring 'er in nice and slow. I'll take over if I see anything's not right. Paul nods as he narrows his eyes in a look of determination. The ground rises up closer and closer until finally, the plane makes contact with the ground. EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON WHEEL which SNAPS off under the pressure of the plane. BACK TO SCENE Sparks fly wildly behind the plane. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS TOM BRADLEY Jesus, hold on! Paul's entire body is shaking as he holds on to the violently shaking steering column for dear life. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS Everyone stops talking at once as the plane starts skidding out of control. MICHELLE Holy s**t, Paul! Oh my God! Michelle begins running toward the out of control plane, followed closely by Franklin and a few other students. Chase is lying on the grass, holding his bloody nose. He smiles and spits blood on the ground. The plane skids wildly across the tarmac, leaving a trail of smoke and sparks behind it as it goes. After several seconds, it begins to slow down and eventually comes to a complete stop. Michelle runs over to the airplane as Paul and Tom both open their doors and roll out onto the pavement. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Oh my God, are you OK? What the hell happened? Paul, speak to me! Paul looks around and observes the wreckage of the plane. Tom is getting to his feet with the help of Franklin. FRANKLIN Damn man, you OK? TOM BRADLEY (sotto) Can I trust you? FRANKLIN What do you mean? Of course, what's -- TOM BRADLEY (sotto) I s**t my pants. Can you get me out of here before the others notice? Franklin looks stunned. TOM BRADLEY (CONT'D) A+ on your next flight test. (beat; Franklin shrugs) Next two tests. FRANKLIN Now you're talking. Come, on, let's go. Just act natural. Tom puts an arm around Franklin as he's led away from the crash site, waddling around exactly like someone who just s**t their pants. Paul is staggering forward toward Michelle, clutching his neck. PAUL I can't believe... I ever thought... I'd be able... to do this... MICHELLE It was a mistake, something must have been wrong with the -- PAUL No. Nothing was wrong. (beat) I'M what's wrong. It's me. I'm no pilot. MICHELLE No, this wasn't your fault! I promise you, you're better than this, you're -- PAUL Stop it, just STOP IT! Stop defending me. You just don't get it. You never will. Who do you think I am? Do you seriously think I'm cut out for this? You must be an even bigger idiot than I am. MICHELLE Don't you dare talk to me like that! Do you seriously want to be a janitor for the rest of your life? Do you? There's a word for that, Paul. Loser. You give up now, and that's exactly what you'll be. Just another goddamn loser that didn't have the balls to make something out of his life. Paul, tears in his eyes, shakes his head, turns and slowly walks away from the wreckage of the plane. He takes his headset off from around his neck and throws it to the ground, where it smashes to pieces. CUT TO BLACK. EXT. LAX - TARMAC - DAY SUPER: "TWO WEEKS LATER." CLOSE ON PAUL'S EYES The eyes of a broken man. Defeated and tired. BACK TO SCENE As the CAMERA PULLS BACK, we see that Paul is once again emptying the lavatory of an airplane, hoisted up high underneath the belly of the great plane. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - LATER A maintenance vehicle is driven into the hangar and comes to a stop next to another one of its kind. Paul steps out and begins unravelling the hose on the back of the truck. Jean approaches, looking absolutely frazzled. JEAN Aw nuts. Paul, I know you told me there was something you wanted me to do after I got back from break, I just plain forget what it was. PAUL (quiet; monotone) It's OK. I'll do it. Jean smiles, knowing he just got out of doing work. JEAN Hey, you know what? It's true what they said about you. You really are the best! I'm glad you came back. Jean gives Paul a light smack on the back before waddling off. Paul begins emptying the contents of the truck into the waste disposal unit. It makes a loud GRINDING noise as it churns away. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - LATER Syd, Allison, Paul, Ted and Jean are all standing in front of Cliff in the middle of the hangar. CLIFF ... So please, when you're out there driving around, doing whatever it is you do, just watch out. Keep your eyes open. We're lucky no one's pressing charges. JEAN He just came out of nowhere! I mean, who expects someone to just walk in front of your vehicle out there? CLIFF I'm not pointing any fingers, we're all a team here... I mean, you did it, yeah. But as a team, we're gonna learn from it. TED (to Jean) So how loud did he scream when you ran over his foot, anyway? Was it like a shrill, girly shriek or... CLIFF All right, all right knock it off! Bunch of hyenas. (best) Now, as you all know, we're very happy to have Paul back on the team. Jean claps excitedly. Ted gives him a slow clap. Syd and Allison stare coldly. CLIFF (CONT'D) Things didn't quite work out for him. Let's be supportive and, you know... whatever. Get to work. Jean, where are your shoes? CLOSE ON JEAN'S BARE FEET BACK TO SCENE JEAN Oh darn it, I must have left them in the bathroom again. Cliff looks completely baffled. CLIFF Yeah, sure. The bathroom. Cliff shakes his head as he walks away looking like he's about to scream. Syd and Paul make eye contact for a brief moment. Syd turns and walks away. Paul hesitantly walks toward Syd. PAUL Hey, Syd. (beat) Syd, can we talk? (beat) Look, I'm sorry about what happened between us. I'm not perfect, I -- Syd pretends to sniff the air. He turns to Allison. SYD That's funny, something smells like bullshit. (beat) Is that you, Al? Are you the one that smells like bullshit? Allison frowns and rolls her eyes. SYD (CONT'D) Nope, can't be. Your bullshit never smells so foul. It seems to be coming from... that direction. Syd gestures over his shoulder. PAUL Syd, cut it out, this is ridiculous. We're grown men, let's just talk about this. SYD Hey, who wants to grab a drink after work? Anyone? Allison nods. Ted looks up from the truck he's emptying. TED Only if I can bring the shoeless wonder over there. JEAN Really? I'd love to, thanks so much for asking, what should I wear? Maybe I should go home first and change... SYD (talking over Jean) So, to recap, that's me and Al, and Ted and Lean Jean over here. Anyone else? Syd scans the hangar, looking right past Paul. SYD (CONT'D) Nope, that's everyone. All right, four for drinks. Just like old times. Paul gives Syd a cold stare before turning and walking away. Allison stares after him with a hint of compassion on her face. TED So just to be clear, we're not inviting Paul, right? INT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - CLASSROOM - DAY Tom Bradley stands at the front of the class by the white board, his arm in a sling. TOM BRADLEY So, as we've seen... landing in a crosswind is a bit different. Clearly, it involves a lot more skill than just your normal every day landing. CHASE Must have been a hell of a crosswind for Parrish to f**k up that landing so badly. TOM BRADLEY Hey! Do NOT speak ill of that young man! He's a prodigy, a talented, handsome gift from God and I won't tolerate that kind of attitude toward him! (beat) I don't know what happened that day, but I'll tell you this - it was no crosswind. Something sinister was afoot. Michelle glares at Chase from the back of the room. Chase takes his pencil and pretends it's a plane crashing into the ground. He snaps the pencil in half and flings the pieces into the air. Michelle furrows her brow, gets up and leaves the room. EXT. FLIGHT SCHOOL - PARKING LOT - ESTABLISHING SHOT - LATER The parking lot is cast in an orange glow from the setting sun. INT. MICHELLE'S CAR - CONTINUOUS Michelle is sitting in her car, staring out at the front door of the flight school. The front door opens and students begin filing out. Michelle is scanning the crowd for one a*****e in particular. Chase gives one of his idiot friends a high-five before getting into his car. Michelle turns the key. Her CAR ROARS to life. Chase backs out of his parking space and speeds out onto the road, cutting off an oncoming vehicle, which is forced to slam on its brakes. Michelle backs out of her own space and pulls out of the parking lot as well, going in the same direction as Chase. EXT. DOWNTOWN L.A./INT. MICHELLE'S CAR - LATER MICHELLE'S POV Chase's car is directly in front of Michelle's on a busy downtown L.A. street. He makes a turn and Michelle follows closely behind. EXT. DOWNTOWN L.A./INT. MICHELLE'S CAR - LATER Chase turns into the parking lot of a strip club. The lights of the club bounce off of Michelle's windshield as she pulls to the side of the road and scans the club's parking lot. Chase suddenly appears from the darkened lot and makes his way into the club. Michelle gets out of her car and follows after him. INT. STRIP CLUB - CONTINUOUS FRONT ENTRANCE The MUSIC THUMPS loudly inside the club, shaking the walls and drowning out any other hint of noise. MAN (O.S.) Hey sugar tits, you either pay the cover or work for it on stage! Michelle turns around to find the BOUNCER, the largest, sleaziest-looking dirt-bag she's ever seen, leering at her. Michelle cups her ear and smiles at him, pretending she didn't hear him. BOUNCER (MAN) Cover charge, b***h! Pay it or get out! Michelle smiles and nods before whipping out a can of mace from her purse and giving his eyes a good cleansing. The massive creature drops to the floor, yelping and clawing at his eyes. Michelle takes a five dollar bill from her purse and tosses it at him. PERV ROW Chase is seated right up front, throwing dollar bills at a modestly attractive blonde stripper with tassels on her n*****s. CHASE Yeah! Shake it! Michelle walks up behind Chase. She leans over and whispers into the ear of the guy sitting next to him. He nods and gets up. Michelle takes his seat. The stripper grinds up against the pole, licking it on her way down to the floor. A middle-aged man sitting on the other side of Chase grimaces at the sight. MICHELLE Pretty sweet moves. How many years of daddy neglect you think it took before she perfected them? Chase looks over his shoulder in surprise, to find Michelle sitting next to him. CHASE Jesus, what the hell are you doing here? I didn't take you for a bean flicker. MICHELLE What did you do to the plane? Chase throws another dollar bill onto the stage and makes cat calls at the stripper. CHASE The hell are you talking about? MICHELLE I know it was you, just tell me how you did it. CHASE Hey, listen b***h, I don't know what you're getting at, but -- Michelle suddenly grabs Chase's junk as hard as she can. Chase looks as though he's about to throw up. His eyes bulge from his head. Michelle takes a few dollar bills from his open wallet and tosses them on stage. MICHELLE I really think he likes you! The stripper winks at Michelle and flashes her the gnarliest set of teeth she's ever seen. The middle-aged man throws up. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Now, I'm not gonna let go of your little tiny pecker until you tell me exactly what you did to make that plane crash. Tears are welling up in Chase's eyes. Michelle squeezes harder. Chase screams. CHASE I tampered... the wheels... Will's idea, not mine! MICHELLE Will... Will who? Who's Will? CHASE The pilot... Paul's buddy... Michelle releases her kung-fu grip. Chase doubles over in pain and falls to the floor. The stripper leans over the stage, curious as to what just happened. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - DAY Paul is hosing down a maintenance truck. He sets down the hose, walks over to the truck and starts scrubbing a stubborn stain. Cliff walks by in a huff. CLIFF Parrish, hurry up with those trucks! PAUL Yes, sir. (quietly) You lazy son of a b***h, why don't you help out for a change? Cliff stops in his tracks. CLIFF (O.S.) What's that? PAUL I said I'll get right to it. You go take a break, you do too much around here, no one truly appreciates it. Cliff nods silently in agreement and then begins to walk away. PAUL (CONT'D) (quietly) Prick. CLIFF Huh?! PAUL Nothing, I'll be done soon! CLIFF Stop saying s**t as I'm walking away. It's really annoying. Clean the goddamn trucks. Paul continues scrubbing away at the truck. MICHELLE (O.S.) Way to stick to it the man. Paul turns to find Michelle standing at the entrance to the hangar. The two stare at one another for a moment. INT. LAX - MAINTENANCE HANGAR - HALLWAY - MOMENTS LATER PAUL What are you doing here? I haven't heard from you in weeks and you just suddenly show up where I work? MICHELLE Hey, it takes two to tango, pal, I haven't heard from you either. Paul shrugs. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Look, I'm not here to argue. There's something you should know. PAUL Oh Jesus. You're not... Michelle looks confused until she notices Paul is looking at her stomach. MICHELLE Are you serious? We had sex one time and you wore a condom. You think you've got a ballistic missile down there? It's about the plane. A short beat. PAUL What about the plane? MICHELLE It wasn't your fault. Your landing was perfect. PAUL What the hell are you talking about? The goddamn wheels broke off! MICHELLE Because Chase tampered with them! Paul looks shocked as he runs through it in his mind. MICHELLE (CONT'D) He let it slip in one of his weaker moments. But there's something else... have you spoken to the pilot of the plane that you saved recently? PAUL Will? Not in a while, why? MICHELLE He put Chase up to it. PAUL That doesn't make any sense. Why the hell would he do that? MICHELLE Listen man, I don't know. All I know is, he wasn't in any position to lie about it. I believed him. Paul shakes his head in disbelief. MICHELLE (CONT'D) So now what? PAUL I have no idea. What do you think I should do? MICHELLE Hey, if it was me in your position, I'd rip the b*****d's head off. But that's just me. PAUL Michelle. Listen, I'm sorry about before. I totally blew up on you back there at the airfield and said some pretty s****y things to you, none of which were true. MICHELLE Don't be sorry. I said some pretty s****y things myself. Paul goes in for a kiss but Michelle backs off. MICHELLE (CONT'D) I don't think that's such a great idea. Paul looks confused. MICHELLE (CONT'D) Paul, you're a great guy. And a great pilot. But I'm not the one for you. Michelle flicks her head to motion to something behind Paul. Paul turns to find Allison watching from the end of the hall. When their eyes meet, she quickly pretends to be checking her phone. MICHELLE (CONT'D) When she came to your place the night I was over, I could tell there was something special there. Don't screw it up, OK? Michelle leans in and kisses Paul on the cheek. MICHELLE (CONT'D) But feel free to call me up if I'm wrong. Michelle walks away and out of Paul's life. He looks behind at Allison as she stares back at him. Paul jerks back to reality and takes out his cell phone. He scrolls through his contacts and dials a number. A beat. PAUL Hey man! Yeah, it's me, how you doin'? Listen, I don't have much time to talk right now, but I was wondering if you wanted to get together for a drink? Yeah sure, your place is fine. Text me the address. How's later on this afternoon sound? Great, looking forward to it! All right, ciao! Paul hangs up the call and his expression instantly turns from a smile to a scowl. DISSOLVE TO: EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - ESTABLISHING SHOT - AFTERNOON A massive mansion big enough to house a small army. Behind it lies a private hangar with a runway extending away from it. INT. PAUL'S CAR - CONTINUOUS Paul approaches the massive house, driving slowly and taking in the sights. PAUL And now I hate you even more, you son of a b***h... EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - CONTINUOUS Paul pulls up to the house in his crappy little Ford Taurus and parks between a red Ferrari and a yellow Lamborghini. He opens the driver's door carefully so as to not hit the Ferrari. A beat. PAUL What the hell, why not? Paul SLAMS his DOOR into the side of the Ferrari as hard as he can, producing a nice dent in the side of the overpriced vehicle. PAUL (CONT'D) Ah geez. Dinged it. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - FRONT DOOR - MOMENTS LATER Paul is standing at the front door with a six pack of beer as Will opens the door in front of him. He's wearing a smoking jacket with satin pyjama pants and looking quite relaxed. WILL There he is! I was wondering if I'd ever see you again. Come on in, make yourself at home. Paul steps over the threshold. PAUL Sorry, I didn't wake you, did I? WILL Oh, no, no, no. These pyjamas were unbelievably expensive. I wear them every chance I get. Plus, it feels like I'm wearing nothing at all. You wanna feel the fabric? PAUL No, I'm good. WILL Shoes, shoes, shoes! Just had the marble polished. Thanks, pal. Paul takes his shoes off and tosses them to the floor haphazardly as Will closes the door behind him. INT. WILL'S HOUSE - DEN - MOMENTS LATER Will and Paul are seated in Will's den, each with a beer in hand. PAUL This place is... crazy. I mean, wow. You've really done well for yourself. WILL Go big or go home. It's a common expression that I sometimes like to say. I guess in my case, I sort of do both at the same time, though, huh? Will laughs obnoxiously. Paul pretends to find the joke funny. He's obviously holding back his anger, waiting for the right moment to strike. PAUL And those cars... the Ferrari is a 'beaut, always wanted one. WILL You wouldn't believe the kind of tail that I get when I drive that thing around town. Women literally disrobe in public and present themselves to me. It's actually disturbing to be quite honest. You wanna take it for a spin some time? PAUL Oh no, that's OK, I'd be too afraid I'd put a dent in it or something. Paul flashes a cocky smile. WILL So, Jesus, how've you been, man? How's school going, you must be almost done by now, huh? PAUL Yeah, I actually didn't quite finish. WILL No s**t, they gave you your license early? I knew they would, you're an ace pilot, always have been. A beat. Paul laughs and scratches his head. PAUL I am, huh? Is that what you think? WILL Of course, you were always great. I mean, you had that accident a long time ago, but... you know, that was just a fluke. PAUL Why'd you do it, you a*****e? Will looks taken aback by the comment. WILL Whoa, hey, put the gloves away, Rocky, no more beer for you! Geez, you get one in you and you're like a twelve year old girl on her first period -- Will's head flies to the side as Paul nearly puts his fist through it. Will drops to the floor. Paul shakes his hand in pain. PAUL Jesus! Ahhh! Why does punching hurt so much? WILL You a*****e! You got me right in the tooth! I think I lost a filling. Do you see it anywhere? PAUL Shut the hell up! Why did you tell Chase to tamper with the plane? Are you insane? What did I ever do to you? Will glares at Paul for a moment. He spits out blood on the carpet. WILL You've been showing me up ever since we met! Ever since day one you just had to be the best at everything. Always the teacher's pet, always the best pilot. And now you swoop in and steal my thunder all over again! PAUL Steal your thunder? I saved your life, you idiot! WILL Well, you should have just let me die, then! You know, I'm under investigation by every branch of the FAA that exists? My license is suspended, I can't work. How long do you think before they take this house? And those two gorgeous cars in the driveway? And my pool, which you haven't seen yet, but it's awesome. And my -- PAUL Shut the hell up! I don't want to hear another word from you. You disgust me. If I ever hear from you again, I WILL call the cops. (beat) I'll show myself out. Paul begins to walk away. WILL Go ahead, run away! That's all you're good at. That's why you've never amounted to anything your whole life! Go back to your s****y job with your s****y friends. Who needs you?! Paul stops in his tracks for a moment before continuing on. INT. WILL'S HOUSE - FRONT DOOR - CONTINUOUS Paul finds a key ring on the hall console by the front door. He pauses a moment before grabbing it. Paul heads back into the house, past the den where Will is still lying on the floor, and through the kitchen to the rear of the house. PAUL You don't think I could have passed that test?! You don't think I'm just as good as you? Paul flings open the back door of the house and runs toward the hangar. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - HANGAR - CONTINUOUS Paul runs up to the hangar door and begins trying each key on the key ring one by one. CLOSE ON KEY RING None of the keys that he tries work. BACK TO SCENE PAUL Come on. COME ON! Finally, the satisfying CLICK of the DOOR being unlocked as he finds the right key. Will is running frantically toward Paul. WILL Hey! What are you doing?! Get back here! Paul disregards Will's incoherent screaming and instead rushes inside the hangar. INT. WILL'S HANGAR - CONTINUOUS Paul smacks a large red button to his left, which begins the process of lifting the main hangar bay doors. He runs to the small prop plane in front of him and takes out the key ring yet again. WILL Stop, f****r! I can't believe you think this is a good idea! Turn around and fight me like a man! Paul looks back to find Will running full steam ahead, arms flailing, toward the hangar door. Paul tries two keys, neither of which work to open the plane door. PAUL Screw this. Paul smashes the window of the plane with his elbow and crawls inside. INT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS Paul flips a few switches and brings the plane to life. INT. WILL'S HANGAR - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON PROPELLER which WHIRS to life. BACK TO SCENE Will rushes through the hangar doors and barrels toward the plane, as it starts to slowly move forward. WILL What the hell do you think you're doing?! Don't even think about it! I'm a very powerful man! You'll be cleaning toilets in Peru when I'm done with you! Ignoring Will entirely, Paul picks up speed. Will grabs onto the door of the plane and tries to grab Paul. The plane continues down the runway, going faster and faster. Will struggles to hold on. INT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS Paul tries to punch Will, as Will desperately tries to grab onto Paul. Paul takes his left hand and pushes on Will's face. Will tries to bite him like a dog would attack a milk bone, but Paul's palm is covering Will's mouth. PAUL Get off my plane! With a powerful shove, Will goes flying away from the window. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS Will falls to the runway below and rolls several feet before coming to a stop. He raises his head just in time to see the plane leave the ground. WILL You stole that line from Air Force One! Harrison Ford turned in a riveting performance! (beat) You're nothing compared to him! EXT. AIRPLANE - MOMENTS LATER The plane ascends into the sky at a steady pace. The landing gear is retracted, as the plane continues to rise. DISSOLVE TO: INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - LATER Paul is now far above the ground, levelling the plane off. He closes his eyes as the wind blows through his hair. He's become one with the plane, completely at peace. A smile creeps onto his lips and he just enjoys the ride. Paul's CELL PHONE RINGS. He searches his pockets, finds the phone and answers it. PAUL Hello? EXT. HIGHWAY/INT. ALLISON'S CAR - CONTINUOUS INTERCUT telephone conversation. ALLISON Paul, what the hell is going on? I just got a call from Will, he said I better get over to his house right away so I can watch him "s**t down your neck". I can't even imagine what that means. PAUL Don't worry. Everything's just fine. I'm just proving a point. ALLISON What point is that? PAUL That I'm not a complete failure! That this isn't all my life is ever going to be! I'm gonna land this plane, and I'm gonna prove that I can do it. ALLISON You keep saying your life is so s****y. What about my life, Paul? What about me? Do you think I'm a complete failure? Do you think this is all I ever wanted to do? I've never told you this, and maybe that's because you've never asked, but I didn't want this for myself either. I wanted to be a stewardess all my life. But you know what? Things don't always work out the way you want them to. PAUL Hey, Al, listen, I didn't mean... ALLISON No, you listen! No one has a perfect life, Paul. We all have jobs that we hate, and people that we hate working with, but you know what? As long as you have someone in your life that makes you happy, none of that other s**t matters. A beat. PAUL Allison, I have to do this. You don't understand... it's been my dream for so long... ALLISON It doesn't have to be just a dream, you can do anything you set your mind to, Paul. But this isn't the way to do it. Why don't you just come down, land the plane and we'll talk about it, OK? I love you, I don't want you to get hurt. PAUL What did you say? ALLISON I said I don't want you to get hurt. PAUL No, the other thing. ALLISON I said I love you, you idiot. You're really gonna make me repeat it? Never mind, I take it back. Just land the stupid plane, OK? Syd and I left as soon as we got the call, we should be there in a few minutes. Please, please be careful. PAUL OK. OK, you're right. I'm coming back down. Don't worry. I know what I'm doing. Paul hangs up the phone. EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS The plane makes a sharp right and begins to descend toward the runway. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS Two police cruisers enter the property and drive up alongside the runway. Will points to the plane in the sky. WILL I want you to shoot him out of the sky, do you hear me?! The plane is expendable, I can buy another! Fire at will! INT. POLICE CRUISER - CONTINUOUS OFFICER #1 and OFFICER #2, both middle-aged men of the law, raise their eyebrows at Will. OFFICER #1 Is he tellin' us to shoot down the plane? OFFICER #2 F****n' whack job. What the hell's he wearing? Will is jumping up and down in his smoking jacket. His satin pyjama pants begin to fall down and he hikes them back up with one hand, but not before exposing himself to the officers. OFFICER #1 Pilots... EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - TARMAC - MOMENTS LATER The plane begins its descent, slowly lowering itself toward the runway. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS PAUL Pushing forward on the controls and trimming down. Paul pushes down on the steering column. He checks the dials and displays in front of him carefully. PAUL (CONT'D) A thousand feet and closing in. Plenty of room left to navigate. The runway looms ahead, growing larger with every passing second. Paul takes a deep breath. PAUL (CONT'D) Deploying the landing gear. EXT. AIRPLANE - CONTINUOUS CLOSE ON LANDING GEAR The LANDING GEAR appears from within the fuselage and is locked into place with a THUNK. INT. AIRPLANE - COCKPIT - CONTINUOUS PAUL Trimming down a bit more. Preparing for landing. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS The plane touches down on the runway in what can only be described as a textbook landing. The plane passes the two police cruisers on the runway as it rushes toward the hangar. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE/INT. ALLISON'S CAR - CONTINUOUS Allison is at the wheel, with Syd in the passenger seat. She is scanning the very large house to her left. ALLISON I think this is the place. Is this it? What number is it? Two police cruisers race past Allison's car and turn left onto the property. SYD Probably not it... Allison frowns, turns the wheel, and floors the gas pedal, sending the car racing onto Will's property. SYD (CONT'D) Remind me again why we're doing this? ALLISON Because he's our friend and he's about to get his a*s arrested. Paul in jail would NOT go over well, Syd. He's precious. Like a doll. A cute little porcelain doll. Syd stares at Allison in disgust. SYD You're way more disturbed than I ever suspected. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - TARMAC - MOMENTS LATER The plane comes to a stop a few yards away from the hangar. Four police cruisers converge on the plane and come to a stop. Two cops get out of each car and raise their weapons toward the plane. OFFICER #1 Step out of the plane with your hands on your head! The door to the airplane opens and Paul hops out, beaming with pride, hands on his head. PAUL I did it! I passed the test! Allison's car suddenly appears from behind the hangar and comes to a stop. She gets out of the car and runs full speed toward Paul. ALLISON Paul! Are you OK?! OFFICER #2 Hey! You! Stop! Allison suddenly notices the army of officers pointing their weapons. ALLISON Oh, s**t! She raises her hands and stops moving. PAUL Al, I did it! I landed it! With no help! ALLISON I see that! Good job, man. Have you given any thought as to what your next move might be? WILL There he is, officer! Shoot him! He's dangerous! He punched me right in the face before, when we were in there making friendly chit chat. He's a brute! Officer #2 turns around. OFFICER #2 Shut up. Two officers converge on Paul and handcuff him. Another officer handcuffs Allison. OFFICER #1 Mr. Parrish, you're under arrest for theft and trespassing. Anything you say, can and will be used against you in the court of law. PAUL Allison! I love you! I'm sorry I never said it before, but I've known it all along! I'm sorry for everything! OFFICER #1 OK, well that probably won't be used against you, but anything else you say... Allison breaks free of the officer that's holding her and runs over to Paul, kissing him on the lips, each of them with their hands tied behind their backs. Two of the officers look at one another and say "aww" in unison. Will's scowl slowly melts away. The officer that was holding Allison runs over and yanks her away. INT. ALLISON'S CAR - CONTINUOUS Syd is sitting in the car, arms crossed, doing his best to look annoyed. A smile creeps onto his lips as he watches his friends. He shakes his head. EXT. WILL'S HOUSE - TARMAC - CONTINUOUS ALLISON I'll wait for you. Be strong. Avoid the showers. Paul and Allison are led away to different squad cars. A tear rolls down Will's cheek. WILL Wait! The officers stop in their tracks. WILL (CONT'D) I made a mistake. OFFICER #1 Excuse me? WILL It's not his fault. I made a mistake. He had permission to fly the plane. I'm not pressing charges. OFFICER #1 You mean to tell me you just wasted the time of eight L.A.P.D officers? WILL Wasted is a harsh word. Misused, maybe? Officer #1 looks as though he's about to tear Will apart, limb from limb. OFFICER #1 Let 'em go! OFFICER #2 What? OFFICER #1 You heard me. This was just one big c**k tease. The officers shrug and take the handcuffs off of Allison and Paul. Each officer walks by Will and glares at him on the way back to their squad car. Will speaks to each one in turn as they pass. WILL Sorry. Terribly sorry. Made a mistake. Only human. Won't happen again. You look mad. Paul turns to Will. PAUL What the hell was that? WILL What you two kids have... it's so beautiful. It may shock you to hear this, but... I'm so lonely. All I have is my mansion, my sports cars, my pool, my airplane, my -- ALLISON We get it! WILL Anyway... I've never really found someone that loved me just for who I was. Sure I have countless women in my life, many of whom would give anything to do unspeakable things to me... but you two have something so special. You deserve each other. Don't ever squander what you have. Paul. I'm sorry, brother. I guess I've been a bit of a jerk, huh? PAUL A jerk? You almost killed me! WILL Well, that's a bit dramatic. I wouldn't say that's entirely true, I mean... Syd is now standing next to Allison's car. SYD What the hell's going on here? What do you mean he almost killed you? Syd sprints across the pavement and tackles Will to the ground. SYD (CONT'D) Nobody tries to kill my best friend and gets away with it! Paul and Allison smile as the sounds of punching and screaming can be heard O.S. PAUL I guess he's forgiven me? ALLISON In his own way, I guess he has. Paul and Allison embrace and share a long kiss. WILL (O.S.) Oh God! You're so strong! Why are you so powerful? My doctor thinks I may have early onset osteoporosis, please be gentle! Ahhh! Paul and Allison finish their kiss, laughing and smiling brightly at one another. FADE TO BLACK. INT. HAWAIIN HOTEL - LOBBY - EVENING SUPER: "TWO YEARS LATER." Paul and Allison are standing at the reception desk of the well-decorated hotel. A HOTEL DESK CLERK (20s), a cute, bubbly girl with a lei around her neck is standing on the other side of the counter, smiling brightly. HOTEL DESK CLERK You'll be in room 206. Enjoy your honeymoon, Mr. and Mrs. Parrish. PAUL Thanks! Allison puts her arm around Paul as they make their way to the elevator. ALLISON That was such a long flight. I'm ready to just pass out. PAUL Don't fall asleep yet, we still have to consummate the marriage. It's not legally binding until we do it in Hawaii. I think I read that on one of the forms. The two newlyweds approach the elevator. Paul pushes the button. ALLISON Oh my God... Allison taps Paul on the shoulder. PAUL What? ALLISON (staring past Paul) Isn't that... ? Paul turns his head to find Chase Cooper mopping the floor at the end of the hallway. PAUL Holy s**t. Chase dips his mop into the bucket and brings it back out, spilling water all over the floor. CHASE Goddamnit... The ELEVATOR DINGS and Paul and Allison get in. INT. HAWAIIN HOTEL - HOTEL ROOM - MOMENTS LATER Paul and Allison are on the hotel bed, making out. ALLISON Did you bring it? PAUL Of course I did. ALLISON Put it on. Paul reaches over to his luggage and pulls out a pilot's hat. He puts it on his head and grins. ALLISON (CONT'D) Captain Parrish. Permission to climb aboard? Allison pulls him in for a kiss. ALLISON (CONT'D) One second, I just want to go freshen up. Stay right there. Allison gets up and heads to the bathroom. ALLISON (O.S.) (CONT'D) Oh my god! PAUL What's wrong?! ALLISON The toilet is backed up in here! That's DISGUSTING! PAUL You're right, that's awful. One second, I'll call down for help. Paul picks up the phone and dials zero. PAUL (CONT'D) Hi there, our toilet is backed up, can you send someone up right away? (beat) Thanks. Oh, actually, there was a guy in the lobby mopping the floor, really friendly. He offered to take care of any problems we had. Could you make sure you send him up? (beat) Thanks, we appreciate it. Paul hangs up the phone, looks at THE CAMERA and smiles. FADE OUT. THE END
© 2014 ScottTheScreenwriterAuthor's Note
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ScottTheScreenwriterWaterdown, Ontario, CanadaAboutI'm a screenwriter based out of Toronto, ON. I began writing in 2013 and have quickly developed a love for the craft. It's something that I take very seriously, while at the same time enjoying every m.. more..Writing
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