Hang Your Head In Shame

It was with chills that I checked behind that door

Remembering everything she ever told me about her life

All the struggles and all of the grief she endured

Everything flashed before my eyes as the hinges groaned

Inch by inch the light leaked inside that blackened room

Revealing in front of me a sihlouette against the curtains

Swaying as if a gentle breeze had swept through

I fell to the floor in instant disbelief

Filled with confusion and hurt my throat got tight

Was this really happening to me?

To us? 

To her? 

Streams of pain trickled down my face

My hands holding my spinning head

In that moment she took me with her

And I died on that cold floor of a broken heart 

 

 

 

Reviews

[DrumMajorPod]

Two words come immediately to my mind after reading this: hauntingly beautiful.

Your word choice is.. truly astounding in every detail; your use of uncommonly used words was one of the many reasons I adore this poem. One line in particular stands out. It is the final line, and it reads "I died on that cold floor of a broken heart."

It is a universal feeling.. that of absolute heartbreak. Heartache unlike any other.. and if you have not yet felt it, then you are lucky. But if you have, and obviously you have.. then you know there is no other such feeling in all the world.

That one feeling.. makes every single aspect of your life diminish in worth. That one feeling can break your spirit and heart down to nothing.

I need to stop rambling. Anyway, great poem! I enjoyed reading it, even though it was heart-wrenchingly sad.

[closed account]

wow, I can so see the vision you painted, very sad and Eerie at the same time,, this was great!!

[Deborah Shepard]

beautifully done haunting you are a good writer loved it

love and light

[Vanessa P]

Tragic love story...very sad. I do like its darkness. I was able to picture a very haunting and gory image. Well done my dear.

[Anna]

nicely done... i like this piece a lot