Lesbian Lunch

Over lunch, Maddie interviews the only openly gay kid at school and learns something about herself and friendship along the way.

Maddie walked quietly down the hall, occasionally looking over her shoulder. She was heading to the front door and she kind of hoped none of her classmates saw her.

“Hey, Maddie,” Angie said, sneaking up behind her as Maddie reached for the door. “What are you doing here? Everybody's in the cafeteria waiting for you.”

Maddie removed her hand from the door handle. “Can't,” she said, her eyes to the floor. “I've got an interview for the paper.” This interview was the first time she had regretted working for the school paper. She knew she was going to get teased for this one for quite a while, possibly weeks.

“Skip,” Angie said trying to drag Maddie by the arm back into the building. “Whoever it is couldn't be more important or interesting than Zeke Hillman. He's wearing that muscle shirt again and we all plan on counting those muscles.”

Maddie half-laughed as she turned towards Angie. “Wish I could skip, but I've got obligations.”

“Come on, be serious. It's not even a class. It's just an extra curricular activity. It's not like you're being graded or anything,” Angie reminded her.

“I know,” Maddie said. “I just can't.” She struggled to think of a good reason to not back out of the interview. “I need the newspaper for college applications. I need Miss Brooks to give me a recommendation.”

“That sucks,” Angie said, turning around to head back into the school. “Catch ya later.”

Maddie put her hand back on the door handle as Angie turned around and brushed past her. She opened the door and stepped out. “Who is it anyway?”

Maddie quietly followed as Angie surveyed the front lawn.

“There's nobody out here,” Angie commented. “I think you're off the hook.”

Maddie looked up quickly. “Nobody's there?” She stepped forward.

“Well, just Jessica Gardner,” Angie said. “Nobody worth talking to.” She turned to Maddie with a huge smile. “You're saved then. Whoever it is didn't show, you can join us.”

“I'm interviewing Jessica,” Maddie whispered.

“Jessica Gardner?”

“Yeah.”

“Miss B. sure gives you some odd assignments,” Angie said. “I'm out of here. Have fun trying to make anything she says interesting enough to read.”

As Angie retreated into the school, Maddie made her way over to the tree Jessica was sitting under.

“Hey,” Jessica said as Maddie walked under the shade of the tree. “I totally expected you to not show.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Being seen with me has a certain stigma.”

“A what?”

“People will talk.”

“People will talk anyway.” Maddie sat down and pulled out her Blackberry. “I'm going to record this, if that's all right with you. It keeps me from having to take notes and it lets me eat my lunch.”

Jessica smiled. “Tuna fish on Wonderbread, one Velasic kosher dill and a blueberry Yoplait?”

Maddie looked into her lunch bag, a sad expression on her face. She closed the bag and set it aside. “I'm not really hungry.”

“Too bad,” Jessica said. “My mom made roast beef on rye,” she added as she rummaged through a small reusable shopping bag that had a large rainbow emblazoned on the side. “She even made an extra one.”

Maddie's eyes opened wide in a newly found hunger. “With Swiss?” she asked.

“Hold the mustard,” Jessica added. “Just the way you like.”

Maddie grabbed it, quickly unwrapped the saran wrap and took a bite. “I miss this,” she said with her eyes closed as she savored the flavor. “My mom could never make anything this good.” Her eyes flew open as she realized what she said. She looked around in a panic.

“Don't worry,” Jessica told her. “I understand that we're not friends anymore. It was just a gesture of peace.”

Maddie took another bite and chewed slowly. She finally put the sandwich on her lap and pressed a few buttons on her Blackberry. “Let's get this interview started.

“Today is May 10, 2011. Interview with Jessica Gardner. Maddison Reeves interviewer.”

“So professional,” Jessica commented.

“Jessica,” Maddie began, ignoring Jessica's joke. “Tell me what it's like to be the only gay kid at Carter High?”

“I'm not the only gay kid, I'm the only openly gay kid,” Jessica pointed out. “I assure you, there is a difference. And I'm sure the closeted kids have it a lot worse than I do. And no, before you ask, I will not speculate on who those kids may or may not be,” Jessica replied.

“Okay, then,” Maddie said, a little disappointed. “Do you know who they are?”

“Some,” Jessica said. “I'm someone safe to talk to, but it's not my secret to share, so that's all you'll get out of me on that subject.”

“Okay, then,” Maddie said. “Back to the original question. What's it like being the only openly gay kid at Carter?”

Jessica smiled in amusement. “It can be awkward,” Jessica replied. “It's a small school in a small town. I get teased in the halls, I get open threats and I've lost a few friends to it.”

Maddie lowered her head in shame. “Let's start with the teasing,” she said. “What kind of things do they say?”

“Well, they're teenaged boys, so they're not overly clever,” Jessica replied. “Just mostly catcalls and getting called a dyke. Occasionally one of them will ask if I'll kiss their girlfriends. Like I want to be something to jack off to.”

“That's disgusting.”

“Which part?”

“Mostly the visual at the end,” Maddie admitted. “I'd like to think they don't do that.”

Jessica laughed. “It's best you don't.”

“What do you do when the guys tease you?”

“Normally I just ignore them,” Jessica said. “At first I spent hours coming up with witty retorts just waiting for them to say something, but I soon realized that it just encouraged them. So now I ignore them or nod and agree. They really hate it when I agree with them that I'm a dyke.”

Maddie thought for a moment and then continued. “The threats,” she began. “What kinds? Has anybody ever acted on them or are you afraid that they will? I would be.”

“Well, I'm made of stronger stuff,” Jessica said with a smile.

“I'm totally strong,” Maddie replied with a whisper and a childish pout. She barely finished when they both started laughing.

“You can't even get the tab open on a can of soda.”

“Can too.”

“Does this mystery method involve passing it over to your boyfriend?”

“A little.” They both laughed again and Maddie asked, “So the question?”

“The threats I get are mostly harmless. My mom's had my cell phone number changed three times and the house phone disconnected entirely since I came out two years ago. Most threats are pretty idle. I'm not really worried.”

“What kind of threats do you get?”

“Mostly calls that say God hates me,” Jessica said. “There have been a few death threats. One rape threat in my voicemail had my mom make me take it to the police. I thought it was funny that somebody thought that if he raped me it would make me like men.”

Maddie just stared, her face ashen.

“Mads,” Jessica said. “It's okay.” She touched Maddie's shoulder, waking her from her shocked stupor. “I can take the talk. It doesn't hurt.”

“But nobody should have to go through that,” Maddie said through her daze. “Why did you come out? You could have just stayed silent, waited until you could leave town.”

“Someone had to be the one,” Jessica told her. “And I'm strong enough to be it.”

“What do you mean?”

“If nobody came out, everybody suspected would be singled out and targeted. I put myself out there to protect those who aren't strong enough to take the abuse.”

“When you say it like that it sounds so noble.”

“Thanks.” Jessica blushed. “I'm just doing what any friend would.”

“I don't know how you do it,” Maddie admitted. “I think I'd kill myself if I was in your place.”

“I know,” Jessica said. “But you don't have to be in my place.”

“How were your parents with the coming out thing?” Maddie reached into her bag and grabbed her yogurt.

“My dad and I don't speak anymore,” Jessica admitted.

“I'm sorry,” Maddie said, resting a hand on Jessica's arm. “I know you two weren't very close, but that's harsh.”

Jessica picked at the grass for a moment and then said, “Yeah, well, the not talking is my choice. He tried to send me to one of those Pray Out the Gay things. When I refused, he made my visitations hell with his constant, 'You're going to Hell if you insist on this path,' speeches. His wife started treating me like I have something contagious.”

“He always was a little cruel,” Maddie said.

“Mom was cool though,” Jessica said with a smile. “She took me to the judge and we had a talk and decided I didn't have to see my dad anymore. She even takes me down to the city once a month to parties and get-togethers for gay teens put on by her PFLAG group. She's very active in the community and wants me to have as normal of a life as I can.”

“She always was awesome. I never knew what she saw in your dad.”

Jessica laughed. “I know, right? They're so different. She told me once when I asked that she saw me in my dad.”

“Corny”

“Very.”

They laughed loudly, the missing years of their friendship forgotten.

“Jessie,” a male voice said. Both girls went silent and turned towards the sound. “You've got a date today.”

Maddie's expression was one of panic and terror.

“Geez, Trent, I wish,” Jessica said. “She's just interviewing me for the school paper. I'll still have to keep seeing your mom.”

“Aww, come on,” he said. He turned to Maddie, “I bet Derek's jealous.”

“Of what?” Maddie asked.

“You,” he said, “with another guy.”

“Another guy?”

“He means me,” Jessica explained. “I date girls, so I must be a guy.”

“Oh,” Maddie said.

“See ya, guys,” Trent said as he headed for the school door.

They watched him leave and Maddie turned back to Jessica. Her mouth dropped as she realized something. “Holy crap,” she said, making Jessica look at her. “You're still watching him.”

“A lot of girls watch him.” Jessica replied.

“Straight girls,” Maddie replied. “Girls with crushes.” Her eyes bulged. “You like him. You're not a lesbian.”

Jessica quickly jumped forward and put a hand over Maddie's mouth. “Don't ever say that,” she said, her voice very stern. “Don't ever even think that.”

Maddie's eyes were huge and when Jessica removed her hand she said, “This story's huge. I'll get front page.”

“You can't do that,” Jessica seemed very scared.

Maddie beamed. “You don't have to be teased anymore. We could be friends again.”

“Maddie, stop.”

“What?”

“I'm doing this for...” She looked down at the Blackberry diligently recording their conversation. “Mads, I can't...”

“What's going on?” Maddie asked, confusion in her voice. “Why would you pretend to be a lesbian for two years?”

“I was planning on finishing out high school.”

“Why?”

“Not everybody is as strong as me.”

“You keep saying that,” Maddie said, agitation evident in her voice. “What does that even mean?”

Jessica repeatedly opened and closed her mouth, as if she wanted to say something, but didn't know what to say. “How long have you been dating Derek?” she finally asked.

“I don't know, a few months, maybe. Why?” Maddie asked. “Are you trying to change the subject?”

“No, I'm just curious about how serious you two are?”

Maddie looked uncomfortable. “You know,” she finally said, shrugging. “He's fun and all, but I'd rather keep things casual, I guess.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why casual?”

“I,” Maddie started. “He,” she tried again. “There's just no spark between us. Why is this so important?”

“Well, I also noticed that you weren't watching Trent.”

“So? He's not my type.”

“I know,” Jessica said quietly. “I've always known. Before you even knew.”

“Knew what?”

Jessica lifted an eyebrow in question. Maddie's face turned white once again.

“I can deal with the teasing and the abuse,” Jessica said. “Not everybody could.”

Maddie reached down and turned the Blackberry's recorder off.

Reviews

[Shardbearer99]

That was really a great read. It looked really professionally written; it was fluent, inspirational, and gave a good insight into how some gay people must feel, not having the ability to be truthful or open about their sexuality, in fear of what others might think. I wish you the best of luck with this project. Your characters are really good, well written and belieavable. This has very good potential to become something that many young people will be able to relate too. Congratulations on a great story

[Jenna]

Omg I never saw that coming

[~Anita Sandlin~]

This is really good...never would have guessed the ending, which makes it even better.

[compositionc]

That was just an amazing story. Like, well done.

[Tasha]

I agree with Hunter, this was a very surprising ending. i really liked it.

[Mary]

This is REALLY good.
REALLY REALLY good. And well handled.
Your writing is getting better with everything you write.
My only note would be - I think I would end it with:
Maddie reached down and turned the Blackberry's recorder off.
Also, I think I would change the "4 years" to "through high school" 4 years is a LONG time for a kid. and if she has already done 2 that leaves 2 Long time. When you say "end of high school" I think they are pretty close to there.
Once again, Excellent.
M
M

[Hunter Jaine McCarthy]

I did not see that ending coming. I like it was good.