ALONE IN A CELL

for my brother

my baby brother as a child

used to hold ur face in his hands

eye to eye

while

he told u what he had 2 say 

ive seen his heart shine throught those eyes

on many a day

being his big sister i understand the way

torment and pain grew

i understand how it effects us 2

me and my brother

not our siblings not the others

were what they call sensitive

but we call it resentfull

YOU DONT HURT THE ONES YOU LOVE

that is our law

and through it all

that one thing stands

my baby

my brother 

grew into a man

angry  confused and hurt by life

he still took a woman as his wife

and when he had a son

he finally found the sun

the warmth of a love to be enveloped in

the promise of a future to develop and

he still couldnt see through the pain

to plan his own tommorrow

hurt again by his love who only wanted to borrow

his emotion

left to drown in his ocean

my brother shot a man

thank the lord he didnt die

but i still cry

as i drive down the same road that he stalked his prey

i hug my baby

who as a toddler climbed onto my bed

and as a teen i braided his head

i gave him over to the law man for his justice

holding the question in my heart wher is our justice

i know that he was wrong but what about the things that drove im to the point of jail

his f*****g father and b***h of a wife should be sitting in that cell

right along with my brother

this fucked up hood

should be doing time 

but instead im left alone on the 1-9

19 street without my first son

13 years between he and i 

i was the one who taught im how toclean his plate 

to walk and talk 

hell

to pee straight

so i guess

heres the twist

im just as guilty in all of this

because as a young bull when he jumped at me 

i sent him back to mommy

i should have kept him in my home

now he wouldnt be alone

in a cell

living in his own private hell