Suspended somewhere

Suspended somewhere

A Poem by Floating on the feathers of a dandelion

 

I belong to nowhere, no-one,

Suspended somewhere is my existence in dark,

Feel no gravity of destiny.

 


© 2008 Floating on the feathers of a dandelion



Author's Note

Floating on the feathers of a dandelion
Well i had tried to write a haiku...but perhaps no-one liked it since it hardly had a structure similar to haiku so i am changing it genre to poetry.

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Featured Review

I'm never the sort who enjoys rating or grading poems. I'm more a reader than a critic. Your poem is fascinating, almost like watching a suspended animation: the tone is sombre and forlone with no sense of equivocation, the imagery is dark and sure is enticing ... enchanting.

Posted 9 Years Ago


7 of 7 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I love this poem! Makes me feel like I'm having an out of body experience! It makes me feel like I'm in touch with my soul.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I still love this! Bravo!

Posted 9 Years Ago


We've all felt like this I'm sure. Non existent to societies reality. When we speak and no one hears our words, when we are at out most beautiful and no one sees us; and even when people hurt us and do not realise. Like ghosts of sunlight.

I found this most pleasant to read for you have penned this well. I shan't say that you have captured so much in so few words because you know you have, you wrote it, but this haiku is, in my eyes a masterpiece and I adored the words you use. But one thing I really enjoyed was the last line, "Feel no gravity of destiny". It made me thing about the depth of these words. If no one sees, hears or acknowledges you then does your destiny of dreams still hold or is it forfeited into a destiny of darkness, as you so rightly painted. Or may be it is a liberty and blessing mixed with a curse, to "feel no gravity of destiny", to have no weight of responsibility. If no one sees you they do not expect things from you, therefore your time is yours and you are free from the chores of life. After all this is what every individual worker wants after the trails of their weekly hardships-the weekend. The chance to be able to do nothing, to "feel no gravity of destiny".

I warned you your haiku made me think :-) I found it very enlightening and thought it beautifully penned. I comment you for this, and thank you, I really loved reading it. And I also like the picture; it ties in well with the subject of your creativity. Magnificent!


Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This made me sad, the imagary was very good and a sense of lonliness came over me.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

A wonderful write and great take on a Haiku. I loved the picture..:)


Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I am not much for writing structured poetry myself - I don't follow rules very well lol. For three simple lines I think this says a lot - I can feel the sense of not belonging anywhere - adrift in the world all alone, left to fend for oneself. nicely done.

laura

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

the first line is a fantastic choice of words. it really caught me. and the play with words, making their meaning slightly different to the reader, is great :)



Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i like how short this is.
its intresting to say the least

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

This is a lovely meditation. I am not one for structure. I read for content. I liked this a lot. Delicately expressed.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Does it really matter what style it is being called?........ a Haiku, a U2, a Me 2......... ignoring rules and boxes this piece is quiet stunning, every reader can feel the desolation behind your words,this piece should be left as it is. What style shall we call it?

Mx

Posted 9 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


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Added on February 22, 2008
Last Updated on February 25, 2008

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Floating on the feathers of a dandelion
Floating on the feathers of a dandelion

Underneath blueeeeeeeeee sky, India



About
Hmmm.... About me ?!?!? I am what i would have wanted myself to be, i am a butterfly when i want to tickle the flowers, i am a bird when i want to compete with the flecks of cotton, i am the river whe.. more..

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