The Silent Sentence

There it is again.

That thing you didn't say.

I hear it more and more

dropped in conversation

each disappointing day.

I'm painting holes in the air

right there for you to fill,

but you don't see them;

just walk through them;

don't have the stuff to fill them.

It's true some words

can cut and burn,

but none to me so much

as the most amazing words

left undelivered.

Unrequited.

Not even known.

Beautiful words

I long to hear,

dancing like fairy lights

along your musical breath,

painting my whitespace

in kaleidoscope wonder,

filling the universe

with possibilities.

Instead, the words lie still, unopened.

in some deathly, quantum nonexistence

asphyxiated in the vacuum

crushed in the deafening emptiness.

Reviews

[ANTO]

If you took my blood right now and examined in under a poeti-tron microscope you would see these words flowing through me in frustrated platelets and arteries filled with consternation.
You didnt write me here - you wrote this a long time ago, but you might as well had done.
Now take that damn cuff off me - Im getting outta here lol
Brilliant CR

[C.R.Turner]

Hope it wasn't too painful! Interesting poem in your blood analogy there somewhere.. Go! :)

[LJW]

This is a rare find. Uncontrived. Real.
There is nothing more loudly terryifying as the vacuum of deafening emptiness. It fills us all.

[April Blue]

Nicely done.. The words came together nicely...

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"It's true some words
can cut and burn,
but none to me so much
as the most amazing words
left undelivered.
Unrequited.
Not even known."
Woaah! Some truth here.. I liked how you weaved words around! Nice reading this :)

[Cindy Marietta]

I loved this poem! So descriptive and relevant. Especially loved the lines
"That thing you didn't say.
I hear it more and more
dropped in conversation
each disappointing day."
Fantastic write!

[Lexi I.]

I could really relate to the beginning of the piece. It seems like that signals the start of the "unraveling" of the relationship. It reminds of those strange, awkward silences that are created when people have started (or have been) growing apart.

LOVED your use of words and images, like "the words lie still, unopened"! I'll be reading more of what you have!

[C.R.Turner]

Thanks NoJane! :D

[Michael Kevin Spencer]

The more I read this, the more it grew on me, until it was one of my favorites of the contest.

[Meliss@k]

It made me feel sad reading this... that maybe these two people were in a relationship that was beginning to fade away. I feel like when relationships start to dwindle they become so "one-sided" and so much more silence begins to appear.

I enjoyed reading your poem.

[C.R.Turner]

Thanks for the read and review!!! :)

Yes I guess without failed relationships, us poets would go out of business! The happier we are, the more we see our profits plummet! Haha!!

[Meliss@k]

You're so very welcome! As much as I appreciate others who read my own poetry, I love reviewing theirs too. :)
It's so true! Good thing relationships (friendships, etc..) are almost impossible to avoid. :)

[C.R.Turner]

OK OK I get the hint.. I'll go read a few of yours... ;)

[Meliss@k]

haha, oooh shucks. :) thanks

[LA Lorena]

I loved this! the imagery, the feeling, the tone, all was spot on. If I could offer one criticism, (well it's just my opinion,) but in your last line, if you changed the final word to silence, rather than emptiness: it just has a greater impact, and ties it all together much more neatly.

[C.R.Turner]

Hey Lorena (?) Thanks for that. Much appreciated. For me, and the intent of the poem, 'emptiness' fits the bill much better. (unfortunately! Ha!)

Thanks for the great comments!!!

[LA Lorena]

It's all good! It's your vision after all! ;)

[Circe]

the things we never get to say, that's what haunts us most, really crushing poetic stuff.. makes us fools for not taking those precious chances.