Fate

This started out as a poem about metal, but it slowly evolved into Fate as my muse whispered in my ear...

Fate...

 

Destiny...

 

All of time and space collide

in a swirling maelstrom

of coincidence, luck, and prophecy.

Like a flowing current,

half-visible lines connect us

in the chaotic sea of endless lives.

 

Like a road through the forest

on a misty Autumn night,

Fate takes us through

unimaginable pathways

that we barely expect.

However, sometimes we come across

a fork in the celestial rode

where we must make choices

that control our Destiny.

 

Like veins of freshly-mined bronze

we have the potential to become

anything we can possibly imagine,

from the blade of a deathless warrior

to a glittering beautiful ring.

And so, we must all choose:

Who and what will be become,

and what is it that we truly want?

 

It is often believed that all we can be

are puppets to that unstoppable Fate.

But I believe that he is not our master.

I believe he is simply a wise, old man,

strolling down the path of our lives,

gently, kindly guiding us along

to the ultimate prize at the end:

 

Destiny...

 

 

Fate...

Author's Note

As always, feel free to critiqe

Reviews

[Constance]

The last stanza is reminiscent of my favorite poem, Invictus, by William Ernest Hensley... you know, the one that goes, "It matters not how strait the gait, how charged with punishments the scroll/ I am the master of my fate? I am the captain of my soul". That poem has inspired me since I first read it at about 14. It was the first poem I read and thought... "Damn, I wish I'd written that. It says just what I wanted to say!"
This is a solid write. Good work. I think I would remove the word and from the second to last line of the last stanza, simply for purpose of flow. It isn't really a needed word. I also see it could be removed in the last line of the stanza just before the last. Those are the only changes I would make. Wonderfully insightful and vivid poem here, Justin.

[Ebb and Flow]

Fate. What a word. A word which means more to me then any other word. This is an awesome poem and portrayed beautifully. The personification of Fate was wonderfully done. Thank you for writing this.

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

Very thoughtful write...quite compelling. I like how the story unfolds before you like a beautiful Truth. Thank you.
Light,
Siddartha

[Dani California]

Justin, this is fabulous!

Very insightful....
I too believe we control our own destiny...
Our fate.
We are guided...yes,
but have free will to choose.
Some choose well....
Some do not.

This flows really really well too!! :)

Excellent my friend! As always.... !

[Wildfleour]

A very different write for you, Justin. You and I do seem to ponder the same things. So much of my writing is about Fate/Destiny.

Maybe you want to end the same way you began: Fate.....

Destiny....

[Fran Marie]

believe he is simply a wise, old man,

strolling down the path of our lives,

gently, kindly guiding us along

to the ultimate prize at the end:



Destiny...

Very deep thoughts expressed about the fates~ we are predestined by destiny's design ~ the end
stanza so nicely wraps this poem up~ Very nicely penned piece my friend~Fran Marie

[darkgurl]

I like your write, it is very well written, especially your last stanza, like them lines the best. like the whole write very well written.