A Mournful Song

Losing, finding

the first story

lost and found

love left and came back around

searching, crying

the second story

lost and is still

love left

life goes downhill

Loving, clinging

pushing, pulling

the birds stop singing

and the fireworks cease winging

Hoping, realizing

crying, falling

crumpling,

slowing

stopping the

beating

closing

shutting down

dying

and one last bird

picks up a mournful song

and I slip to nothing

goodbye, I'm gone.

Author's Note

reviews please! :D I like this one!

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the use of words in this poem. The flow of thoughts led the reader to a good ending. I wish I could write poetry using limited words. Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Courtney Taylor]

love it message me

[rosemary keogh]

loved it

[Archia]

"goodbye, I'm gone." Since this has a such a fast flow this last line ends it suddenly, but with an almost peaceful tone to it. It was really good. I liked that last part about the bird, it was really nicely done.

[S. Michael Long]

zen, is all i have to say (: nice. -s

[dontwakeme]

I like this one, too! I love the rhythm of the words! Keep up the good work...I especially like, " the birds stop singing, and the fireworks cease winging."

[SuicidePact.]

I like this one too!

especially the last paragraph/stanza..

you used great describing words..I forget their technical term (eek!)

I don't know what else to say but i really liked this!!