You're the Reason

This poem was written when I was sort of starting a new relationship with this guy named Bryce, but then I realized too many things about him reminded me of my ex so this poem is a result!

 

 

Nothing Last's Forever,

That's what they say.

Obviously we didn't,

So I guess they were right.

 

Don't you see how messed up I am?

Well I do, everytime I glance in the mirror.

Don't you see what you've done to me?

You're the reason I can't love him.

 

He's worse than you,

how can that be?

A little lie I tell myself

to push him farther away from my gray heart you helped cement.

 

And even if you read this,

it probably wouldn't make a difference to you,

because you don't love me anymore.

Then, how come I'm still waiting for you?

Tell me

 

Poor Bryce, he'll have to pay

for the wounds you inflicted.

 

Author's Note

Well, what do you think??

Reviews

[AutumnRose]

this is absolutely stunning, it exploded with true feelings, and the flow doesnt seem forced, simply awesome!

[Pikkakard]

I disagree with your comment on my poem. This is far better than mine. It's incredibly sad and feelings I also had at one point. Just know that the only person who can change how you feel is you.

Great poem though.

P

[Emily Rose]

Aww. That's sad. I can feel the emotion in this, although honestly I think it could use a little more concrete imagery make it more memorable and get your point across better. As it is now, it's just a collection of scattered thoughts with a weak common denominator, so you might want to throw in a metaphor and some specific imagery to spice it up a little :-) There are a couple spelling and grammar things too: "don't you see what you've dont to me" should be "done to me" (I think...) and there shouldn't be a comma comma after "pay" in the second to last line.

Good job with this - don't mind my nitpicking - I'm a tough critic :-)

[Rachel Hays]

Nice. I feel bad for this guy. You might kill him, hehe. My favorite part, just so you know: "A little lie I tell myself to push him farther away from my gray heart you helped cement." Brilliant! It's so descriptive and it really kind of hits you in the face. I really enjoyed this. Thank you!

[Chrity]

I like it! Lol have you noticed my writings are advertised? its pretty funny lol

[Face In A Crowd]

It's wonderful. Your just an amazing writer.