Lush, Sultry Night

Pantoum

Cool breeze, soft touch, lush sultry night,  

rest memories 'neath moon-kissed lips. 

Hot, growing passions take to flight; 

desires embraced whilst warm dew ~ drips.  

 

Rest memories 'neath moon-kissed lips, 

sweet essence lingers -- restless sighs. 

Desires embraced, whilst warm dew ~ drips. 

eternal love bears no disguise.  

 

Sweet essence lingers -- restless sighs … 

gentle fingertips trace my spine. 

Eternal love bears no disguise; 

slight shivers quicken ~ so divine! 

 

Gentle fingertips trace my spine, 

shall not resist such boyish charms. 

Slight shivers quicken ~ so divine, 

wrapped tightly in my lover's arms.  

 

Then, joining bodies, hearts ’n souls … 

hot, growing passions take to flight. 

Held breath exhaled, pure bliss extols … 

cool breeze, soft touch, lush sultry night.

Reviews

[M P Ramesh]

susan,


Experience irrigates the imagination and the flowers are as above..

great attempt indeed.................


carry on

mp

[Ghost]

I remember some moments like this.. Very passionate write

[Susan 🦋]

:-) thank you very much! I appreciate you taking the time to read and review.

[Chris]

Was a soft sweet read. AND you followed the form well.

[Susan 🦋]

:-) I have a GREAT teacher...he won't let me budge from proper form. Thanks for the review!! I appreciate it! :-)

[Richard McLin]

great piece, beautifully written. Great job.
-Richard

[Susan 🦋]

Thank you Richard! I appreciate you taking the time to read and review. :-)

[Tate Morgan]

Put me
In mind of younger days when I set directly beneath the fireworks in my town with a beautiful girl in my arms

[Susan 🦋]

Sweet Nate...loving that thought

[Tate Morgan]

Nice to he’s from you kiddo life is good for now though the news of late us so discouraging I’m glad My son is graduating college in may I am glad I don’t need the worry of kids in school

[Tate Morgan]

Sorry bout the typos using my phone not good lol Tate

[Susan 🦋]

Oh I know.. scary world.

[barleygirl]

One of the best I've seen of these kinds of poetic styles that use regularly repeated lines (I'm not a fan of repetition, but yours is not distracting). I like the way your loving interactions can be visualized in the reader's mind, which looks & feels very graceful. Well-crafted rhyming & use of word sounds to get that smoothly flowing effect (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Susan 🦋]

Thank you Margie for another wonderful review! I'll head over to your page just as soon as I can :-)

[barleygirl]

Never a "quid pro quo" with me . . . I can't remember well enuf to keep score, so just stop by any time you think of it! *smile*

[mattavelli]

Hello, Susan! :)
This is a lovely pantoum. Sections three and four were my favorites, sensual. And well done on the form. It can take some mental gymnastics to get these written. Haha

[Susan 🦋]

LOL agreed! First one I've wriiten...Thanks for the kind review :-)

[Nicholas Shea]

Your poetry is so wonderful on multi dimensional levels. Another brilliant piece, masterfully written.

[Susan 🦋]

Aw Sweet Nicholas! Thanks for the kind review!..