An Apology to My Angel

You love me to death

With every last breath

I love you so much

But, there is no proof of such

 

Because I fear losing you

Because I fear the loneliness of lost love

I do all the stupid things I’ve done.

But, still I am the one you love

Why, oh why?

Why do you love me?

Why do you constantly kneel before me,

Handing me your heart of gold?

 

Why do you hand me your heart?

I break it as though it were delicate art

I love you; I love you, my angel

But, with me your heart is in danger

 

How can you love me, my angel?

You do nothing to bring me agony,

Nothing to break my injured heart

How can you not find another?

 

I never mean to cause you such pain

I swear it on every drop of rain

If only I could spend each day by your side

You never would have cried

 

Dear angel, I beg you

Keep your sweet heart of gold

Your beautiful love too

You deserve more than a heart so cold

 

I do not deserve such love

I could never deserve a heart of gold

You should never love…

You should never love a heart so cold

 

Fly free my angel

Fly free of my danger

Find a better love

Find a true love

I’m so very sorry

I could never be strong

I know I’m wrong…

For a heart of such pure shining gold

 

I will always love you my sweet angel.  I swear it on everything I have.

Author's Note

I've done some very stupid things lately and this just poured out from it all. Please review guys. Thanks.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I used to sing this song, in my younger days . . . I didn't realize it back then, but looking back now, I see it's like Elmarie is saying in her review: we free spirits push others away, saying all the things you're saying in your poem, becuz on some level we know this heavy committed love style is suffocating to us . . . pure devotion sounds like a good thing (how can we dare to push it away?), but it feels horrible to someone who needs breathing space & mutual independence. I understand your being so hard on yourself, but I wish you the perspective to claim the kind of love that makes you thrive, even if it isn't the predictable devotion that other's crave.

There are some nicely-crafted phrases, such as: "I swear it on every drop of rain" . . .

[Elmarie]

Sometimes we get stuck in a relationship that is far too deep for our young minds and we still need to be free. I dare ponder on your reaction to his love and I feel even though you can see this gentle, genuine love, I feel a suffocation and a suppression of your free spirit. Sometimes people love us more than what we love them and as hard as it is, we hurt them to remove the hold they are implying through their devotion. And inflicting hurt is often the normal way to do this. Not necessarily the truth but a perception only.

Hope your heart is healing and the guilt is fading. Beautiful day to you my friend.

Well written poem and it got me rambling.

Blessings

EL

[Inject Positivity]

I can feel your words Tessa, but I want to tell you that if someone loves you like that then you do deserve the love... Don't question your value my frnd, just like she loves you I believe you love her too, because your words show how much you care about her, I am sure your angel will agree with me too... We all make mistakes but we don't hurt our loved ones willingly, our situation causes us to do such things, and our loved ones understand that too... Don't worry my frnd, you do deserve love... God bless you...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[Tessa Melendez]

I didn't explain the situations in the poem, friend. And it's something I don't want to explain. It was not my Angel that I hurt but someone else. It really was a horrible situation and I can't explain why I did what I did. But, I can say that I really did not and still do not deserve him.

[Teddybearlee]

This one is very powerful to me in such a personal way, but powerful no matter how you look at it. Well written, really gets the emotions across. There's a story here, and it leaves one wondering so much, which is a great thing, because it does affect the reader in such a way. I will say this, being "the other person", my love has messed up tremendously, absolutely beyond words, very few would find it in their hearts to forgive, but I would, and I believe the person you are speaking too would forgive anything as well, love can conquer all, I believe in my heart. Really enjoyed this piece, thank you for sharing it.

[Tessa Melendez]

Thank you for your review. I'm glad to know that I've managed to write such a powerful piece.

[alifeacoustic]

Love has stupidity already built into it. We all, each and every one of us, have done something stupid in the name of love, or under its spell at least. Even the saying "we live and learn" doesn't quite cover it, because we don't always learn to not make the same mistakes again and again.
A beautifully heartfelt and poignant plea, wonderfully written Tessa.

[Tessa Melendez]

Thank you for your review. :)

[alifeacoustic]

You're welcome.