Mask

For the "What A Word!" Contest.

Masks

 

behind such covert smile...

he is only a man

made of love and life...

he promised to love her while he can!

the dance is on closing chapters...

when soon shall end their plan!

 

behind it awaits a person...

now, now...

he's a human not a man...

the lights fading away...

as only their eyes see each other's...

they sway away the day...

the moments come and gone...

the truths we knew all along!

the glamour withers...

as the veils come aside...

the stage is also empty now...

there's no one, behind to hide...

he is only human...

but he falls... along his broken pride!

 

the laughters are gone...

tears drop on his cheek...

what is that he feels?

he stood against the mirror...

afraid of the fate he seals...

and slowly he takes a look...

he turns out the light...

tomorrow...

will take us away...

far from home...

tomorrow...

will take it away...

the fear of today!

the echoes of his laughter fade....

and the faces shatter as if of glass...

and the hearts splendor their perade...

the flowers of doom...

upon his masks they shade...

the sins of his beloved...

and the fragments of his blade!

 

 

Reviews

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

This is sad.. you have a way with images and descriptions .. I enjoyed the poem though it is sad.. like life sometimes..

Chloe
xoxo

[Steffi]

Your usage of imagery is very well done.
"behind such covert smile...
he is only a man
made of love and life...
he promised to love her while he can!
the dance is on closing chapters...
when soon shall end their plan!"

[justjenn_2u]

he turns out the light...
tomorrow...
will take us away...
far from home...
tomorrow...

Even though there is much sadness in the poem, I enjoyed the above line. I feel like you are saying time will heal. This poem has tremendous imagery!!!!!! I always love your work.

[K.Rena]

Nicely written it flowed well and i felt the story

[Brenda Sue]

Love the imagery in this piece. Wonderfully penned. Great job.

[Cece]

:)

[Y.F.]

Very nice.
My favorite line - "he's a human not a man".
Really shows the darker sides of us all, the darker side of our relationships.
Great imagery on this one as well.
Good job overall.

[JC Fox]

I actually enjoyed this piece I wasn't sure if I would but I did, I loved the dark feel and the imagery. Great job

[Ahmad Alhour]

Very nice poem...
Enchanting somehow... but i guess that there is some broken rhymes that can be fixed so that your poem become deeper and nicer...

Fro other side, i love this kink of your writings when you talk about your experience in life specially with the people you've loved...
Nice similies you use when you talk about the theaterical events of life like chapters of written book...

"the dance is on closing chapters...
when soon shall end their plan!"

And i guess that you just can't forget about your love with Natali...
"the laughters are gone...
tears drop on his cheek...
what is that he feels?"
I know it's hard, actually overwelming....
But that is such nobel to be faithful to the people you've loved...

And i also liked:
"tomorrow...
will take it away...
the fear of today!"
Like you don't like to suffer away from her and away from the passed people in your life...
You are looking forward to another tomorrow that will erase all your fears and melancholy keeping the happiness ov thee...
But i guess my friend, it's a dreamside dimenstion that it will never come true in the time being of this journey...


Great job...
I love it...
Keep up the good stuff...

[Burr the Story Sorceres..]

I really love it. It reminds me of Evanescence's song "Everybody's Fool." It really is lovely.