Gravity

about the tearing apart of the mind

My armor is dark silver            and slowly falling,

can you see the cracks, the       marred flesh

underneath this shell          no, my soul

cannot bear this pressure      anymore

It is raining tonight      is it?

The pavement is black and      cold, wet

The sky is gray      must be why there are no

strangers out tonight            to see me,

no strangers to watch me        fall apart

my skin cells are crystals        rapidly dissolving

swimming in this maze           this - mind

rapidly dissolving, maybe       gravity wears

death’s cloak, can I fight          gravity?    

Behind the cracked pavement     are apartments,

broken down, graffiti on the walls      and blood

on the streets, did you hear          that gunshot echoing

loudly, the men in black masks       never mind,

perhaps it isn’t real, just something       I heard,

can you smell the rain, how           pungent it is?

I can smell death in the rain       strange isn’t it?

Reviews

[Breezie Kae]

I love the way this poem is set up, it's so intriguing.

[George Love]

With this form, you can almost read too distinct works in a point-counterpoint fashion. Nicely done

[Tina Kline]

Wow! Very impressive indeed. It works well the format you chose to write it in. I think this is great, really great work!