trestle

metal will never rust under thick creosote 

white scratched initials marring snapshot love

and pangs of teenage angst chiseled clearly

while rumblings never disrupted circle geological marker

old twin rails witnessed transition from steam to diesel

two secluding pre-pubescent feet dangle over edge

smoking Kool Menthols and cursing under breath

tobacco smoke trailing from nostrils like a pent up dragon

and a bottle of five and dime wine burning throat holes

and that glass will bust like an angry fist thoroughly

on train tracks below swearing the whole world can just 

kiss 

off 

Reviews

[s y e]

Xavier, you write with such a passion and put so much information into your poems that I feel I learn something either knew or in more depth when I read you.

This is no different, I adored it as always.

[lee von cleef]

Black and white
Scotch,
Boys arm and arm,
No color to erase their smiles,
Pure,
Fun,
Lost, but in a memory,
Pissin over the fence Perfect.

[Linda alexander]

while rumblings never disrupted circle geological marker
old twin rails witnessed transition from steam to diesel
the typical teen boy's snap shot love is ever living, as iron never rust under trestle, chiseled clearly, without getting any damage from the rumblings of trains passing from steam engine to diesel engine, means a very long time, typical teenager used menthol, tobacco,wine and acted as typical teenager by throwing wine glass or bottle in to the tracks, I will say lucky that teenager in that decade compared to today's, look at some teens of today, pressurized like inside the pressure cooker, uses maijuana, molley, coccaine, heroine, ectasy, vodka,kills brain cells, won't limit to wine products of five and dime,becoming unproductive to society for long time, poor teenager of this decade, he probably will not even go to trestle
well written, splendid imagination supported by facts from the past, enjoyed it fully

[m.s.early]

(: thank you for your usual delving review. you remind me to be thankful for the problems i have because they could certainly be worse :)

[Linda alexander]

You most welcome, my pleasure, as per me none of us have problems, problem is our perspective, take care

[Claire in VA]

If only we knew what all those trestles know! Kind of like, "if walls could talk." Train trestles must be a part of every teen's life that grew up in rural America. This piece sure does bring back fond memories. I can smell that creosote as I type. You are very talented. This is a gift from God. I'm glad that you are not wasting it.
~Claire in VA

[m.s.early]

(: thank you so much for the review and recognizing the source of the talent. :)

[DaughterNature]

This has some good parts to it. I sense that you really like thickly-worded description, and that is more than ok! However, I again challenge you to limit the number of different images you use in any one piece, as the ultimate message tends to get muddled with too many things to compare. I do love the power of the last stanza, though, and you should keep that one just the way it is!

[m.s.early]

(: thank you for your challenging reviews. i seriously take every comment into consideration. :)

[DaughterNature]

Love to hear it! Mutual!

[Mollie Fitzner]

Not exactly an activity I participated in, but have a few with my own brand on it. Thus it reminds me of carefree teenage temptations, friendships, harmless pranks, fun without getting caught...so many times I wish I were 17 again...good age for me and great friends.

[m.s.early]

(: thank you for appreciating the nostalgia :)

[Mockingbird]

descriptive coming-of-age piece that captures a moment of youth's invincibility. it reminds me of 'stand by me', pre-pubescent is key in this poem.

[m.s.early]

(: thank you mockingbird. yes pre-pubescent is indeed a key. always appreciate you stopping by :)

[Sami Khalil]

Powerfully written, geologically ingrained, rebelliosly inclined...A splendid poem...:)....................

[m.s.early]

(: thank you sami :)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)...................

[SkinlessFrank]

i grew up in maryland, where we had trestles just like the one you describe, would sit out on the edge and watch the fireflies rise at dusk and breathe in the sweet honeysuckle....later we'd go there to make out, be bad boys, and just generally .... start rebellion.

oh how your words bring all that back.

[m.s.early]

(: how coincidental is it that a friend and i were just talking about honeysuckle? not to mention all of the similar activities taking place. thank you for stopping by skinless :)

[Lyn Anderson]

A solid write again with great imagery -- the throughout throws me, but I can't think of an adequate replacement.

[m.s.early]

how 'bout now?

[Lyn Anderson]

better I think.:)