Legend's Brilliant Glow

To 'ee' and his dear little mouse... with thanks to Emma, the muse.

a curious story to me was told
t'was whispered in my ear
by whiskered spirit thin
i listened close to hear

it murmured that in those final days
before he passed away
the tiny mouse became quite hungry
eating soap now took sway

the old man, weeping of compassion
before the mouse did place
fine cheese, nuts, apples won
by swift atalantia in that race

so the tiny little mouse recovered
a measured degree of health
such that neither suffered
for wont of company or for wealth

and through great friendship ever growing
they made a solemn pact
ere time of last knowing
when a feeble body with pain is rack'd

in that special time, when death is found
known by those who must know
ee and mouse, spirit-bound
passed into the legend's brilliant glow

Reviews

[Emily Burns]

I went back past cummings to Mr. Burns, I thought of his ode to Mr. Mouse:

But Mousie, thou art no thy lane,
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley,
An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
For promis'd joy!

Still thou are blest, compared wi' me!
The present only toucheth thee:
But och! I backward cast my e'e,
On prospects drear!
An' forward, tho' I canna see,
I guess an' fear!

[UfoAuthor]

I have always loved Robert Burns' work although I found it somewhat difficult to read, not being accustomed to hearing/reading the dialect. This piece in particular I have revisited on numerous occasions just for joy of reading it and the message. Thank you for reminding me! :)

[Emily Burns]

my favorite is The Banks and Braes O' Bonny Doon

[UfoAuthor]

Hmm, I seem to have forgotten that one but I'll put it on my reading list for today. Thank you, Emily! :)

[Rhianne Ney]

I loove the way it was expressed and ee cummings to...

[UfoAuthor]

You're a fan of cummings or the mouse? This is a far stretch from the morbidity of the ee's original. However, I believe that most people (myself included) think the mouse probably had the better personality and I don't think ee would disagree too much. :)

[Rhianne Ney]

Yeah... ee cummings just used that kind of style to be more comfortable in writing ;D

[Bell-lala]

This is such a a beautiful poem. :)

[UfoAuthor]

I weep... You are so kind, mia bella! `^_^ May good fortune follow you, always. Ufi

[marlayesterday]

This is so lovely, I can feel the hearts of these companions. Beautiful. :)

[UfoAuthor]

Thank you, very much! So the story (I just made it up) goes... ee was so guilt-ridden by the death of the first mouse (who happened to be the brother of the mouse in this poem) that... well, you see he dried to make amends. BTW, I think they were Parisian mice. :)

[marlayesterday]

There is just so much in your words, that one can keep coming back to them, and their is something else to be gained by it. I truly enjoy your style.

[UfoAuthor]

I can tell you are a very kind-hearted person. I'll bet you have been known to take in stray dogs and cats too! :) Seriously, thank you very much for your review. I _do_ appreciate your thoughts.

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

Indeed they did. This one ends so much lighter than e.e's ...I don't feel so heavy about it, now.

[UfoAuthor]

Thank you, Claire! The mouse was a dear friend. Perhaps a relative in another life. :)

[Emma Lee-Riviera]

I love it. :) It's so breezy and the tone is sort of flippantly blunt. Very ee. ;) *applause* Wonderful piece well written, my friend.

[UfoAuthor]

Thank you, Emma! BTW, if you'll search for up-coming contests you should see: "Chinese Take-out Poetry Contest #1." I do hope you'll consider participating and feel free to invite your friends to do so as well. It's all in good fun, of course. :o)

[Emma Lee-Riviera]

I'll keep an eye out for it. Good thing I have two. ^_^

[UfoAuthor]

Ha! :oD

[Emma Lee-Riviera]

I'm super excited for your contest!! ^_^ I'm working on something I hope shall be worthy of being entered. :D Otherwise, I'll just post it and leave it. ;)

[UfoAuthor]

That is sooo cool, Emma! Well, zonk - post it no matter what. You might even get to be the first-born of the court!! How awesome would that be?? Thank you so much for whipping something up! I have no clue what I/we are doing. Be sure to invite anybody else that you think is wacky enough to enjoy a wiggle-dogkitty-doodly-thang!! Spec'n! o-o/

[Emma Lee-Riviera]

Lol your random words are absofruitly won-diddly-tastic. ^-^/ I salute you for making my... Night/ morning. ^_^;

[kublakhan27]

This one chugs along quite nicely with a good mix of contemporary and "olde" language :)

[UfoAuthor]

Yes, it's an odd mix of this and that, light and heavy, sweet and sour. Perhaps we should refer to it Chinese take-out poetry? Thank you for taking a peek! :)

[kublakhan27]

Haha no problem :)