Questionable Mentality

~ i am not crazy, just thinking crazy :D

 

To think or just blink - something click, then link

a pink fluid runs in the sink, it stink of raw ink

I did a sharp clink

And I laugh like a lunatic

The stinging click makes my brain tic

Then someone wink, I panic

Horror runs in terror deep in my fatty exterior

my heart roars its pounding beat as I roam in fast feat

I struggle for self-control calling all my self-patrol

Holding my reality intact in which for now, I lack

Insanity pulls my multiple personality

~ Questionable mentality ~

Shake, shake rapidly

 now I dance stupidly

all attention now is in me, then I ran horridly

someone pinned me, I scream endlessly

something pierce my skin

a sharp quick pain

a fluid sips through my veins

rushing calming every stiff muscles, then once more I leap

then my heart stops its bouncing beat

my craziness slips into a silent sleep!

 

Author's Note

It started as a wordplay for something horrifying that ends up into something crazy ~ I think i needed my psychologist now...lol(kidding)

~ enjoy my friends!

Reviews

[asdarkeyesclose]

i love the way you experiment with words and ideas, this wordplay is a perfect example, you always stretch the horizon slightly and explore the world, take us to new concepts and ideas. this poem is no exception and is another example of why i rate you as one of the most exciting writers here at the cafe, the word play here was brilliant. it is good to see a writer developing and i always get the feeling you are getting slightly better every time you write- a lot of writers never progress in this way and it is wonderful to watch :) fantastic.

[Pax]

wow ~ i am speechless my friend ~ how can i ever thank you for this awesome response ~ i will treasure this very much! ~ people in wc inspires me much ~ like you with your ever beautiful verses ~ a big thank you ~

[Horizon K.]

Very vivid and affecting write here, my friend, with this catchy wordplay, making me feel almost delirious in shared craziness as ink runs in a sink and I dance like a lunatic... I love playful explorative pieces like this that unfearingly express, what needs to be expressed, as crazy and fantastical as such thoughts may be.

[Sugar Plum ♥]

Oh, I`m sure it`s not because you are crazy :) I liked the rhythm and tempo, somehow looks like without breath, great rhymes as well. sometimes the creative persons come to point, when they need to express in very fast and immediate way, so the emotional condition you describe is familiar to me..even in another way...Nice self-ironic too.

-nour-
09.06.013

[Akshat♥]

I totally agree with you here..
You definitely needs a psychologist lol :D
Once I sat on a needle lol..it pained like hell :D
I am really impressed the way you have written this piece..
KEep writing dear :)

[audrie]

I think this is awesome - I really related to this - Shake, shake rapidly
now I dance stupidly
all attention now is in me, then I ran horridly
someone pinned me, I scream endlessly
something pierce my skin
a sharp quick pain
a fluid sips through my veins
rushing calming every stiff muscles, then once more I leap
then my heart stops its bouncing beat
my craziness slips into a silent sleep!


Nice work!

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Amazing rhyme and rhythm. I love it. I Wonderfully penned.

[Pax]

thank you my friend, I'm really glad you enjoyed it :)

[Mehak Mushtaq]

Anytime my dear. :)

[Reuben]

Interesting

[Pax]

thank you :)

[Caradoc]

This is a fun little morsel wrapped up in a certifiable giggle.

I like how even though it seems disjointed, the narrative follows a set path. It's an interesting little semi tale you have here. About an escaped mental patient perhaps? Poor soul had to be tackled to the ground and sedated. And of course I loved the title drop. Those always get me.

Not bad, my friend.

-Caradoc

[Pax]

thank you my friend ~ this is such sad fate to be in his case ~ but indeed i had fun making the playful wordplay here ~ I'm glad you like it :)

[Wondering Mind]

Nah, I'm not worried...Word-play is fun and you play well.

[Pax]

thanks my friend ~ I so appreciate this review ~ i had fun making this :)

[emmajoy]

What a cleverness! Okay, so initially you were juggling words but somehow your thoughts ran away with you and took over; that shows an open mind, not a warped contained one. Such glorious free flow with swathes of literary and imaginative phrases and intentions. Love it! Read a second time and hear the rhythm and dance of your words.. would make a great audio!

[Pax]

coming from a writer such as you ~ i am honored, thank you very much ~ I'm so glad you enjoyed this playful piece :)