Reunited Impracticallity

Reunited Impracticality

On the wisps of a smog he descended towards my frail stature
Reunited after the bitter sting of fates dastardly deceptions
The heart, a fractured and decrepit detail
Comforting to clutch the body and conduct the soul
We danced along the grassy planes of hell’s graveyard of providence
Words whispered in desperation and severity
Breaking the formula, we stand hand in hand among the venom of the alternative

Shrouded in affections mantle, the body absorbs the radiance
Rekindling the amour and ardor within the mentality
What had been shadowed in mystery, now brilliant in the luminosity
Skimming along the human pelt with grasping fingers and strutting lips   
Together exhausting the personage of the crowding horde
Banned to be united despite the inner fervor, we rebel against the mass
Outlawed by kin, we venture the darkness unaided

Trials and tribulations alter the destination
That final absolution of unity
Faltering along the jagged patches of existence you crumble
A victim to the ideals and sentencing of ill-bred monsters
Fading along the back screen of love’s motion feature
Animosity towards the mischievous spirits that pirated you towards the astral resolution
Carried away on the wisps on the fiends shadows

 

Author's Note

Working hard to make my poetry up to par =D Reviews are MORE than appriciated to help me on my writing

Reviews

[Jean]

Good gracious. Do you read the dictionary cover to cover daily? Again wonderful wording.
Thanks for joing my contest. (:

[THE LOST ROSE]

Wow you have a wonderful way of romancing the english language with your poetry. I enjoyed the write and the emotional journey I traveled on while reading. I am so sorry it took me so long to get to this but I can see it was worth my wait. I am about to start my day after reading your poem. If you have any more poems I would love to read them.

[[untitled]]

This reminds me of a poem I wanted to write, but procrastinated on doing so.
I have a personal response to it, the one that inspired it all... though I am uncertain if it ever happened.

"The foggy afternoon, offspring from the (rare) hot July rain covered the the area of my weed-speckled back lawn. Droplets fell in sync as the clock hands struck. My skin shivered from the carress of the premature northern front. I saw a movement in the bushes. A turn in the breeze. My salt-spiced sweaty hands slid in my pockets. You came closer. Closer. Every step was a beat in my heart, sinking deeper into my chest. I felt your breath upon mine, and looked behind me. You were gone... hitckhicked with the wind"

I just came up with that. Seriously. You can borrow from it if you want (though I doubt it's even nealy as good as your writing. I'll finish that poem. You've inspired me with this piece to move on. The guy whom I wrote about is only a blurred image in my imagination, so I'll site it as a response to to this poem :D

I loved the desription incorporated thoughout the piece. I never really read much close to any of this figurative language (makes me think if I actually read much published writing).
This is my favorite writing yet, so much I will add it to my library :D

I can't give you much advice. And I'm really sory for that.
It's a different format. A different style. I see your strength as a writer, and hope seeing more of it in the near future

p.s. - Before I forget, this reminds me of "Univited" by Alanis Morissette. Seriously. Cheesy song, huh? (i LOVE it)

[Amanda]

a very descriptive depiction of impracticalities...the piece is deep and a bit on the thought provoking side. interesting indeed....it gives me the feel of walking an arduous journey through a perilous minefield, but life and love are sometimes like that....nicely done, Steffi

Amanda

[EMOtion]

definetly would say up to "par", yours must be set high. I really enjoyed the visuals you gave, you painted a picture or I should say several, your word play is crazy-throwing words together in ways i wouldnt even think of, some i felt were a little wordy but not many. Nice