Shattered Apart

There must be a way I can make you see
Your stuck in my memory
Your the flaw in my mind
The spark in my eye
The flame that can't get away from me

When darkness surrounds me your all I can see
When my breath stops and my heart skips a beat you'll know you walked by me

There must be a way I can make you see
Your stuck in my memory
You were here now your not
The first time was a loss
The pain is laced into my brain

When the darkness comes near I know you are here
When you say my name it sounds like goodbye
There must be a way I can make you see
The thought of you is slowly killing me

Reviews

[Sapientiam]

I really liked the lyrical feel this poem gave me. The repetition of certain phrases conveys the speaker's inability to move on, as this person being described has made too much of an influence. However, I will say that the parts where you say "your" I think you mean "you are" (you're). Otherwise, this was a powerful write. Well done!