One tear drop

One tear drop of sadness
A tear drop of two
A tear drop of shame
The second was a clue
One tear drop of worry
One which was close to the last
One tear drop of lies
that caught her by surprise
This tear drop was the last
That came out of her water filled eyes
But this tear drop did not hit the floor
before she died.

Reviews

[Chase]

I think that this is a good start. Clearly there is a lot going on with this poem so I feel like it would benefit from punctuation. A lot of beginner writers feel like punctuation takes away from the rawness of the message in a poem, but in reality it adds a great deal to the readers point of view. It helps us read it the way you wrote it rather than having to guess! Hope to see more of your work soon.

[conspicuousleaf]

Great poem, I like how the feelings of depression are expressed through it.

[Eddie M deadwolf]

Man, great write my friend; a tear for each pain, an each pain has claimed its own name, very wonderful man... Dig the sadness, it releases some of the sadness doesn't it... lets you feel something, very well done my friend: deadwolf