Broken-CoWrite with Rick Puetter

Broken....the death of a loved one leaves one completely remorseful!

Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license. Author: Mario Pleitez. Original photo may be found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/alfinaldeesteviaje/451482805/sizes/o/.

Dear Reader,

A poem inspired by “On Another’s Pain”, by William Blake, and co-written by Sheila Kline and Rick Puetter:

http://www.writerscafe.org/writers/wvhillbilly47/

http://www.writerscafe.org/writers/rpuetter/

We hope you enjoy the poem.

 Broken

Horror in my heart abounds

My lips share thy wailing sounds

For your heart is pierced with pain

And with anguish thy soul strains

 

Lifeless son rests in your arms

Newly felled by Reaper’s charms

Death, thy joy robs from your life

Now plays plaintive drum and fife

 

Now the march to funeral pyre

Now the wood piled higher and higher

As the sun sets in the west

And lost soul is called to rest

 

Nevermore his smile you'll see

Nevermore he'll sing with thee

Nevermore you'll touch his hair

Evermore cries your despair

 

How can I remove thy pain?

All my jests now made in vain

For your heart is set on fire

As now burns the funeral pyre

 

Now new morn wakes in the east

Sleep is now thy weak release

Rest, fair one, and cry no more

For new day has more in store

 

This, the fate of mortal Man

Death brings grief to every clan

Seek your friends and family

Solace in love's harmony

 

I will sit with you tonight

I will hold you very tight

Above stars course through unknown plan

Here, my love, come take my hand

 

 

©2009, Sheila Kline and Richard Puetter, each and individually

All rights reserved

 

Author: Randolph Femmer. Rights: Public Domain, life.nbii.gov. Library of Images from the Environment. Original image can be found at http://images.nbii.gov/R%20Femmer/D_high-res/60-Sunrise-3-little-inn-August-26.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

Rick and I co-authored "The Raven", which has been well accepted, so we decided to take another
of William Blakes's poems titled "On Another's Pain" and offer our version. I thank Rick for his poetic talents in helping form this version!

Reviews

[Ellen Hammond]

You have create a beautiful masterpiece out of heartwretching grief. Lovely rhyme, rhythm, and flow. But oh soooo sad. The last verse sums up what is perhaps the most important thing we can do for a grieving friend.

It seems you are both inspired by William Blake and it shows. Very nice collaboration, as it flows together with no apparent seams. * * * * *

[Helena]

Well written Sheila and Rick. I enjoyed this very much. Your blending of ink
is excellent and you have produced one terrific poem! Bravo! ~ Helena

[Tina Kline]

Really really great collaboration with Rick. You two work very well together.
This is an excellent poem but very very sad. The pain from the loss of a loved one, especially
unexpectedly, think, never heals. Life just provides distractions as our lives go on without
the loved one, that's about it. But friends and family can help.

Just an excellent write!

[Lena M. P.]

You both work very well together and compliment each others talents so well. Nicely written.

[R J Askew]

The notion of a son dying to any father is the worst of thoughts. Your poem made me think how absolute death is. No arguments, no doubts, no grey areas, nor second chances, no maybes, no 'only jokings'. Also thinking about the absence of life makes its presence seem absolutely astonishing. So thankyou for putting me in mind of that last notion. It is easy to forget how astonishing, short and fragile life is.

[Tate Morgan]

One of your best works I like the way the words are arranged for effect not proper grammer It sounds beautiful
tate

[Jinx's Heart]

*Speechless*

[Valentine]

This is a wonderful co-write. In ways it seemed like a touch of old time writing and I personally love that kind of poetry..If you do this well together..perhaps you ought to team up a little more often..This was wonderfully done..Congratulations to you both...God bless..Kathie

[emmajoy]

Hard for me to write a review on this .. Blake's poem was read at my sister's funeral by our father. I can only add that daddy could well have chosen to read this wonderful collaboration.

[ABitBrokenPoetry]

absolutely gut-wrenching & heart-breaking. this is a great write. the flow is perfect, the imagery dark & captivating. you've perfectly captured the mourning of a loved one. amazing piece!

[Jenny Nelson]

Heartbreaking words, but well conveyed the feelings. Reads very smoothly through. You two did a great job with this sad, difficult topic.