Love Isn't A Game

Love Isn't A Game

A Chapter by Dr. YumnaKay
"

In collaboration with YanZeros...

"
Tiles cracking, the concrete surface in mild dew,
storms raging, my mind blowing, having no clue!
Your words fit perfectly; astonished ... in awe!
My life was a mess 'til you came, out of the blue.

I feel that I can easily be honest,  
you are the one I love, don't be astonished! 
My lone cracked heart has now started to be healed.
I know, baby, from me nothing is left concealed.

Please accept it you really are beautiful. 
If I do, will you accept, for each other, we are suitable?
But your month's in July while I'm December... 
sigh... that rising passion in dying ember.

I do care for you, why are you not afraid?
Oh cruel, cruel man, it’s my heart you invade!
I surrender with no question; love isn't a game...
'twas, but now it ignited like a flame.

Burn my soul, drive me away closer to you. 
I'm already here, awaiting your touch, beside you.
Been like counting billion night stars waiting for you; 
now I can spend an eternity just looking ... at you.



© 2017 Dr. YumnaKay



Author's Note

Dr. YumnaKay
A poem with lines alternating first by YanZeros and then by me.
Edited slightly...

My Review

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Featured Review

I love this collaboration. There are some basic "love" concepts that can be found in many love poems ("you are really beautiful"), but the combination of all your combined thoughts elevates the message overall. I'm pleasantly surprised at the excellent rhyming despite two differing points of view. I love this intriguing part -- last two lines of 3rd stanza. These are the complexities of the love game that are anything other than (NOT) sophomoric (as one juvenile reviewer suggests). Good job putting that guy's finger where it belongs! *wink! wink!* The best part of this is the dance between the two of you writers -- it's not easy to collaborate like this & end up with a cohesive message! (((HUGS)))

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you so much BG, for appreciating our efforts! You don't know how much I needed these words at .. read more



Reviews

If someone made a song out of this, it would be my ringtone. My daily dose of romance with danger. I love the emotions, you're angry at the guy but also happy that he's not afraid. You're serious about love being a game but yet the whole poem is a playful read. It also shows the beauty and horror of the most wished for thing on earth.
Ah. Love.
Such a mystery. What is love really? What makes it up?
Something in your head.... And if it's in your head... Is it made up or real?

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

2 Weeks Ago

Maybe I'll sing this for you then ;)
You've been reading my newbie pieces and it kinda makes.. read more
Methinks this might have been where honeyed glue melded two beautiful minds. Lovely poetry, poetry of love.. collaboration more than fine.

'.. love isn't a game... ' ( whilst spoken by one person, the entire poem is of Love, by Love; thus, no preference for a single voice selected!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you for your lovely words on this collab, Emma! Glad you like it (:
emmajoy

1 Year Ago

Had a wonderful time reading your collaborations, a a true picnic! Must away.. x
i would have it all one color font...then it is more of a unified piece...two voices as one...i do like it...and especially the line "Burn my soul, drive me away closer to you"

j.

Posted 1 Year Ago


Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Hm I think you're right about that. I'll change it... thank you for liking this collab, Jacob. :)
Beautiful alternation between Yan Zeros and yourself. The last stanza being my favorite. Well done!!!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you so much, Silmara! This piece is very close to my heart! I'm glad you liked it! Thank you f.. read more
So well entwined, the words are a journey of love, the voices also has a lyrical tone that passionately winds through the readers heart! A wondrous poem to ponder!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you, Michael for appreciating our efforts! It means alot 😊
I love this collaboration. There are some basic "love" concepts that can be found in many love poems ("you are really beautiful"), but the combination of all your combined thoughts elevates the message overall. I'm pleasantly surprised at the excellent rhyming despite two differing points of view. I love this intriguing part -- last two lines of 3rd stanza. These are the complexities of the love game that are anything other than (NOT) sophomoric (as one juvenile reviewer suggests). Good job putting that guy's finger where it belongs! *wink! wink!* The best part of this is the dance between the two of you writers -- it's not easy to collaborate like this & end up with a cohesive message! (((HUGS)))

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you so much BG, for appreciating our efforts! You don't know how much I needed these words at .. read more
Well done. Alternating lines as you both did produced a wonderful love story. The collaboration was seamless. Peter Straub and Steven King did the same in The Talisman, it worked as well. :) Good write

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Woah! That's a huge comparison, Ted!! We have a long way to go so as to come at that level.. But tha.. read more
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Lovely, really smooth cohesive flow. Some brilliant lines. Had you not mentioned it I wouldn't have known it was a collab. Great job you two. Starz x

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you for appreciating our efforts, Starzy ☺
...

1 Year Ago

You're very welcome x
YanZeros

1 Year Ago

Thank you Starzy :)
This is not a collab ! No way !! - that's the best compliment I can pay you guys - seamless !
Some partnerships just work.
This one works - I expect to see more of this first class poetry from Yan-Kay.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 1 Year Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Lol.. I appreciate your sense of humour 😂
Tony Jordan

1 Year Ago

ditto YumnaKay :D
YanZeros

1 Year Ago

Thank you Tony Jordan! :)

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Added on December 12, 2016
Last Updated on August 7, 2017


Author

Dr. YumnaKay
Dr. YumnaKay

Pakistan



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Just someone trying to blend in with the writing world and still trying to hold my own. P.S I do not respond to read requests unless they particularly appeal to me in some way, neith.. more..

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