Shield

Shield

A Chapter by Dr. YumnaKay
"

Ramblings of a raging mind...

"
I shield my heart 
in the hopes that when the time comes 
I'll find the true purpose. 
I stray away from people, 
denying myself the simple act 
of being happy for once. 
Walking away from you. 
Because I don't have the courage to tell you 
that I've stopped feeling, caring 
or even thinking about you. 


I shield my mind 
from the raging thoughts that keep creeping up, 
telling me to face my fears. 
Those fears that keep me awake, 
late at night. 
That fear of falling in love with you. 
That fear of being hurt 
if it doesn't work that way. 
Because I don't have the courage to tell you 
that if even for one second, 
I did see our future together.


I shield myself 
away from you in the hopes 
that it's all for the greater good. 
The only courage I have is to tell you, 
that I'm bored. Bored of you. 
And although it makes me cruel 
in your eyes, 
it's better that way 
than to have myself heart broken. 



© 2017 Dr. YumnaKay



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Featured Review

We know every word from one's pen must first reside in the mind, even if it might express pure fiction, but in having read this piece, it is my sense that much of the author is revealed in your prose-laden commentary, Yumna, as I feel it is actually reflective of your own experience … for me, it's just to genuine feeling not to be.
And, for me in perceiving you, this makes it even sadder to dwell on such hurt and fear of affection and commitment; but, it's completely relatable, too, as it could well have flowed from my own pen, albeit not as clearly direct and passionately expressed.
Your grammar, syntax, line breaks, powerfully expressive word choices, and punctuation are pristine in form and ease of read, flowing seamlessly within each verse, connecting reader and poem beautifully.

Though, filled to the brim with pain, doubt, unrequited need, and fear … I thoroughly admire, respect, and enjoyed reading this excellent piece, Yumna … thank you sincerely! ⁓ Richard : )

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard

7 Months Ago

It's all your fault I'm so smitten … LOL!
Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

Hahah I don't feel guilty at all 😂😂😉
Richard

7 Months Ago

Me either! 😜



Reviews

Well I must say u have great way to express your feelings in such beauty . . . . the title is very clearly justified after reading the story :-) I think if these words were framed in a poem. . . then it would have been a great work. . . and I was a bit confused to understand the actual state of mind . . . in some lines you have showered all your love . . . . on the other hand you are saying that you are bored ??? Apart from this it was nicely written . . .

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

Thank you! I'm glad you liked it 😊
I understand where you are coming from. this piece feels very relatable. great job :)

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

Thank you for understanding the emotions here and for your kind words. I appreciate it 😊
This makes me feel sad... a reminder that no relationship is without pain and hurt

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

I'm sorry that it made you feel sad. But yes, some relationships do hurt.

Thank you .. read more
I can relate to it. Because i feel confused at times.
Poem show's a woman who wants to make it work but does not want to do it by lying.
Being honest breaks the fantasy.
But it is for our best.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

Thank you for sharing your thoughts here. I appreciate it 😊
It's a sad mindset to find oneself in and a sad decision too. You're right, that comes off very cruel but I can actually relate. It makes things easier at times, I wish I could shield my heart and mind better sometimes to be honest. And even if I said a hundred times I don't regret the broken layers of my heart, they become destructive, very much so, lately. A good rambling, well expressed.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

Hmm guess I'll have to do the same.. Thanks, V 😊
Closed

7 Months Ago

You're welcome. x
This comment has been deleted by the poster.
Ordinarily the heart rules the head because it regulates all. It only takes it own Heart-mind off the job of regulating when it finds its soul-mate.
The result is turmoil. Arrythmia and love-chaos. A vacuum. A power-struggle. Only the brain can save the day by constructing a plausible scenario/reasons and a producing the ultimate whitewash report to justify turning away from the soul-mate. The head will take the fall. It will be the patsy in the conspiracy.
The result is poetry such as this amazing introspective piece Yumna. Bravo!

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tony Jordan

7 Months Ago

In the final analysis there will be a balance struck for the sake of the whole. Then there will foll.. read more
Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

Hmm and so it continues...
Tony Jordan

7 Months Ago

etc., etc., etc... lol
' .. when the time comes I'll find the true purpose .. '
You've created a rambling of worries here, needing to understand its enormity. The repeated 'I shield'.. ' is, to me, a laying down of necessity. Perhaps? Sad start to finish.. first person intentions weeping.

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 7 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

7 Months Ago

The words reflect what the mind feels at the time. This was written in a state of confusion. So, yes.. read more

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Added on February 25, 2017
Last Updated on August 7, 2017


Author

Dr. YumnaKay
Dr. YumnaKay

Karachi, Sindh, Pakistan



About
My writings reflect what I am, have been, and what I seek to be. Most of it is just ramblings in prose but occasionally I'll come up with poetry (if mood be). ~ We are not the same person we were .. more..

Writing
Stranger Stranger

A Chapter by Dr. YumnaKay



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