The Keeper of My Demise

The Keeper of My Demise

A Chapter by Dr. YumnaKay
"

As always, experimental...

"
~ words fail me ~

as I struggle to keep on with your pace, I gasp for breath but no air comes and you, the keeper of my demise, lunge forward; my lungs ready to collapse in your heady scent...  

the fiery blades of your eyes unleashing what you had held within for so long, piercing the sides of me... your penetrating gaze did what the softness in them could not; a while back

              ~ words fail me ~             



© 2017 Dr. YumnaKay



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Featured Review

I'm often left feeling a little "wanting" when reading poems this brief . . . but in this case, you've packed so much feeling & used so much vivid imagery, it creates an impactful message despite being brief. Your writing is always original-sounding, which is very important to me.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

I've been practicing to create an impression using few words. Glad that impact found it's way toward.. read more



Reviews

I'm often left feeling a little "wanting" when reading poems this brief . . . but in this case, you've packed so much feeling & used so much vivid imagery, it creates an impactful message despite being brief. Your writing is always original-sounding, which is very important to me.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

I've been practicing to create an impression using few words. Glad that impact found it's way toward.. read more
What extravagant language, utterly mesmerising and so much the reflection of your emotions. This is quite something, Yumna - perhaps a peep into your heart?

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

These were indeed words I wrote from the shadowy dark corners of my heart, Emma. But you know me wel.. read more
emmajoy

1 Year Ago

We show selves to those who deserve to see... :)

Off and away now... hope you smile.. read more
Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Of course. And I will 😉😊 hoping the same for you as well 😊
Such words that sparkle our eyes and makes it feel really nice to read...
Well done Yumna
Keep it up :)

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you, Shaan. Glad you like it :)
Oh my Yumna..this is so raw. Well written. It seems when we are hurt our best pieces come out...(but then again all your writing is amazing.) Love you!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Ahh I wouldn't say it's best but yeah certainly from a dark corner of my heart.. Thank you so much f.. read more
Wow another stunning write... great piece! You describe how it feels to be in love with someone that you just can't seem to keep up with.. wonderful!

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

It seems like it yeah.. thank you again. Glad you like it, Kesha :)
Kesha

1 Year Ago

You're very welcome :)
That last line is obviously not true, Yumna. Words do not fail you.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

They do, too often. Thank you for the kind comment, Ken. I appreciate it :)
This is awesome... great job

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Thank you for liking :)
this is a good kind of demise...dying from love...

the penetration of a look...great double meaning.

and i like the "lungs ready to collapse' again the double meaning...as if about to...but also quite prepared.
j.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

I like your thoughts and interpretation more than this piece :)
thank you for appreciating, J.. read more
Reminds me a bit of your verses in our collab'... Great break-ups and pauses... Only you, keeper of my demise, can rewind your penetrating lies... Other than that... Words fail me in reviewing this... Steadily penned...

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Grrr no lol 😶😛
Silente

1 Year Ago

It will not let me reply with "lol"... What a cheap system
Dr. YumnaKay

1 Year Ago

Hahaha yeah the 10 character system sucks 😶😛

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Added on June 4, 2017
Last Updated on August 7, 2017

Experimental Poetry


Author

Dr. YumnaKay
Dr. YumnaKay

Pakistan



About
I would call myself a writer but I don't feel accomplished or learned enough to consider myself anywhere near as one. I write mainly to clear the weird buzzing in my mind and heart (but I suppose that.. more..

Writing

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