Facade

Facade

A Chapter by Dr. YumnaKay
"

Self reflections. Merely a get out, written hastily...

"
I reflect too often on self ... less often on others and seldom on how my -self- affects others; on how my decisions never include anyone else except my -self- ...

I question my existence and the meaning behind every effort I make, every step I take --- seems meaningless as I trudge along the constantly breaking and half mending strings of life.

And everyday, the half moons under my eyes scream silent screams reminding to make yet another futile attempt because in the end it's me who has to make an effort...

Perhaps I am selfish, self indulgent to the point that I've become immune to the presence of those surrounding me...

Sometimes, it's an overwhelming experience to keep up a facade and dissolve your true -self-


© 2019 Dr. YumnaKay


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Featured Review

Introspection is a deeper and a greater phenomenon than we give it credit for.
Humans are lucky for the kind of intelligence they enjoy. But this blessing of being able to study oneself often turns into a curse when one loses oneself in the dark alleys of their own mind.
Profound and evocative.
Great work!

Posted 6 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Years Ago

I so agree about it being a curse - you feel trapped in your mind but I think it's healthy if you kn.. read more
Jyoti_Ablaze

6 Years Ago

You are welcome. I enjoyed it. :)
alan peter kelly

5 Years Ago

I am not trapped
in my mind.
I am trapped
in my body.



Reviews

If every step seems meaningless
then
as projection

every step
IS
meaningless.

Whenever I go
shopping
the non gender
specific
checkout
human
asks
if I want
a bag
for the goods
I’ve just purchased

I usually say
by way of jest
and sad truth

No

the bags
under my eyes
will do.


Nowadays
I reflect
upon my place
and what I can do
to contribute..

selfishness
seems more
the domain
of wasted
youth.

I am not
immune
to people

I generally
genuinely
and usually
with valid
reason

do not like them.

Your articulations
are inspiring.

I will be back
to feed my mind
spirit
creative soul
again.



Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

5 Years Ago

I think the same holds true for myself re not liking people, although I admit I can be sometimes bia.. read more
Introspection is a deeper and a greater phenomenon than we give it credit for.
Humans are lucky for the kind of intelligence they enjoy. But this blessing of being able to study oneself often turns into a curse when one loses oneself in the dark alleys of their own mind.
Profound and evocative.
Great work!

Posted 6 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Years Ago

I so agree about it being a curse - you feel trapped in your mind but I think it's healthy if you kn.. read more
Jyoti_Ablaze

6 Years Ago

You are welcome. I enjoyed it. :)
alan peter kelly

5 Years Ago

I am not trapped
in my mind.
I am trapped
in my body.
A deep look at self is never a bad idea, it's a way of finding one's strengths and weaknesses. and, having found the odd one or few, tis then time to think.

Rarely peep at others' reviews, no point in being here if to copy others. But, interesting that Annette, with whom i usually agree, thinks differently from me!! But, okay, because in the end, Yumna, you're entitled to think your own thoughts and - unless desperate for advice, need work out what's best for you, or, rather, what's likely to work for you. Sometimes being aware of something is a nudge, to look closer, deeper. Perhaps?

Said too much but your fine writing lures. Your thoughts have set me thinking, feeling, wondering .. doing what you seem to be doing, questioning one's existence, whether or not it's used wisely, kindly. A facade is often considered a kindness to the onlooker.. and, at times, even kinder a veil for the person behind the facade..

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Years Ago

The more I ponder over your words here, it actually is what I feel. About what you said about the fa.. read more
emmajoy

6 Years Ago

That's what friends are for, Yumna. Might not be able to cure but at least can be a temporary Linus.. read more
As beings of light we are capable of emitting and absorbing light; and 'bending' light of others
quite accidentally to varying degrees so should we therefore turn away or make ourselves smaller so as not to be as impactful to the light of others.
I say radiate even more and then they will aspire to be a beacon too !!
Just remember there's always an electric bill at the end !
I wouldnt have the 'backbone' to put a write like this in print because it seems so private. You're inspiring Yumna!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Years Ago

I'm probably very sleepy seeing as I only understood your last line :p yes, this is very personal an.. read more
Deeply ntrospective and insightful poem. So true, we all keep up a "facade" in our daily life for many, many layers of reasons. In reading your work dear friend, I know that you are a sensitive, compassionate soul and not "immune" to others. Please don't be so hard on yourself. Perfectionism is a curse and a robber of sleep. We do the best we can, and if not enough, aim for better the next time. Wishing you peace, light and undisturbed sleep! :)xo

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dr. YumnaKay

6 Years Ago

I wish I wasn't but reflecting deep I know I am...but you're so right, perfectionism seems like a te.. read more

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Added on August 31, 2017
Last Updated on February 13, 2019

Ramblings of A Raging Mind


Author

Dr. YumnaKay
Dr. YumnaKay

Glasgow, Scotland, United Kingdom



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