looking for me

the one thats needed, but discarded

" Looking for Me "

You'll always be
looking for me there.
When he doesn't hold you.
When he doesn't always make you smile.
When his arm is not around you.
When your not always first.
When he never notices.
When he doesn't touch you.
When you're just not sure.
When you turn and look at him.
You''ll always be,
looking for me.....

Author's Note

thanks for reading

Reviews

[richy]

Great read. It captures the idea of thinking your past partner will realize what she's missing once it's too late. It helps you get over a break up by saying your the one. It's great but can;t there be a better way to accept a past lover leaving without thinking they've made a mistake; that maybe this is just a life where there are no wrong decisions and maybe she'll be happy and you can be happy for her?

[Greg Agee]

Absolutely, I am very forgiving and in fact am friends with all my exes. While I don't always write my experiences but inspired ones. This has been some of their truth. I'm a really caring person and I want everyone I care about to be happy. They picked a guy who doesn't meet their own standards. Finding them back to comparing me. Not my desire at all. Thank You

[richy]

As long as you are able to have perspective like that you can't go wrong!

[Tiny Drop]

Beautiful! I could feel a whirlwind of emotions forming with your every word. Some words carried a strong longing, some a kind of detachment, some even a scent of love. It was sincere and I felt like the emotions were in reality mine. It was a lovely read. Thank you Greg!

[zunie frost]

Great piece of work !!!
Very nicely written

[Emily]

Very nice poem!
Very well put together!
Well done!

[Ruth]

Brilliant...the flow is tense and the sentiments loud...sometimes the one needed is indeed discarded...something I am not sure we will ever understand the whys of, nevertheless, really enjoyed this piece Greg :)

[barleygirl]

Oh yes . . . good topic . . . the one offering steady friendship as an antidote to love drama! On 6th & 8th lines, "your" should be you're -- contraction of YOU ARE (with apostrophe)! You've described this role well. I can feel a tiny abrasive edge to the tone of the narrator, like come here, you know you want me, dummy! Someday you'll figure it out. It's like the guy on the sidelines feels his position in her life is a more powerful & valuable one . . . but this burst of self-satisfaction is really just a big bluff for the pain he feels at not being #1 to her. All these subtleties come thru, despite the brevity of your poem. Good job!

[Greg Agee]

Thank you for the correction, I appreciate it. I love D.H. Lawrence and Steinbeck. My goal is to write a complete, flowing moment on a few lines. Ir seems that two often, mine specifically, tend to ramble along when choice words could possibly do it better, sweeter! Love your input. Thanks for your time. What are your feelings on the brevity if prose ?

[barleygirl]

I think it's Hemingway quoted often as saying: "I'm sorry this message is so long, I didn't have time to write any shorter." That is, to pack a punch in few words is deceptively work-intensive.

[Greg Agee]

My thoughts exactly. The more I say, the more I take away.As a spiritual Master. I say it all the time. To put it into action, is simply not that easy ;but, in fact is very simple, We make it difficult, I knew you would get me ! Your a very special soil with an awakened spirituality you are still remembering,

[Coyote Poetry]

The poem is true for many things. Some people will touch our life and leave a mark. Thank you Greg for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Greg Agee]

Thank you so much Coyote, elegant as always !

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Greg.

[mou]

when i start to read , every line create a hurry to read the next..very well flow, nice writing..

[Greg Agee]

Thank you so much for your time and attention

[mou]

It is my pleasure

[E G TEN]

Hello Greg, somehow I read this as a chorus to a song. It jas a harmonic flare into it.
Well done on a fine job Sir, thanks EG

[Greg Agee]

Thanks so much, I have a few songs published.With a little work and a great composer, maybe ! Thank you for the kind words

[andrew mitchell]

We always hope we will be remembered, its a pride/esteem sort of thing! Nice write!

[Greg Agee]

of course and hope they choose another thats enough to make them happy, thanks

[andrew mitchell]

we'll never know!

[Greg Agee]

they'll tell you, mine have ! In this scenario. I did not write this as an experience, as I would never say that. Its a common one though. I liked the premise of it. Thank you for the insight,