Jared Coffin

Jared Coffin

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Block Writer Block Writer


About Me

This short piece summarizes one of my main struggles in writing in a fun way.

Razzmatazz. Sure, it has a cool ring when you say it; it sounds all snazzy and bright and fun � but that�s right where the trouble starts. It can be an awful problem when it comes to writing. I still think it�s not as bad as some problems because it usually means you love to use big, 50-dollar words � which, at times, can be more useful than harmful. On the contrary, those gaudy, smarty-pants words have a nasty habit of obscuring meaning. They just get a kick out of muddying the waters. Though they may be redolent of intelligence, they are merely imposters with flashy �knowledge� facades.
Whenever I write, Razzmatazz tends to be my main rival, contending for attention. In fact, I believe he may have snuck into the above paragraph. You can�t really blame him though � it�s just his nature. What I have learned you can do, is correct him. Unfortunately, this involves using a universally dreaded power of the world of writing: the delete key.
For many writers, this can be immensely difficult, because it involves taking criticism. Now, don�t get me wrong � you can add the word �constructive� to it or anything you like, but there is no euphemism for criticism when it involves your work.

So that's one of my - and probably that of many writers - problems. But please do use constructive criticism - trust me I can take it! Thanks.


Comments

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Posted 12 Years Ago


shall I say thanks again? Yes, yes I will. Thanks for the insightful and well rounded critique. I'm glad you found some humanity and tension in an implausible story. It is a fable really in my mind, and as long as the heart isn't false I guess that is what counts. Certainly appreciate it coming from you with your knowledge and passion for the military.

Ah the joys of self editing... I'm glad you caught those spelling hiccups. I went back over and noticed a few others and corrected them. "Then" and "than" and "it's" and "its" are things I lose track of when I am in the moment. I tend to be on of those writers who edits once or twice and then leaves it alone for months.

There is some sound reason in your dislike for the shift to present tense. I tend to do it a lot because I am also a screenwriter. I went back and noticed how I shifted and though I like changing it to the present tense, I did not like the obviousness of that change, so I just made a more subtle shift.

See this is what should be happening on this site more often; a healthy exchange of ideas and critique, knowledge and perspective. Writing can be lonely so who better to understand and show support than other writers?


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Posted 12 Years Ago


Thanks J for the read and review! I appreciate the comments ten fold, it is nice to know you found it to flow decently enough. Yeah the ending is so, so so predictable, perhaps the most predictable ending I have ever written. I struggled with that but I knew to be honest I had to go with it no matter what. That flow was heading that way and I just said, " OK, I'm not gonna struggle ans just try this."

To me the build up is so great and rich that when we come back around it does feel like a cop out of some kind.
NO need to apologize for not seeing more flaws or successes! You enjoyed it and I appreciate that. It is all a learning process... which leads me to the question - what do you do to steer clear of what you feel is a predictable ending vs. an appropriate ending?

[send message]

Posted 12 Years Ago


Jared! I had no idea you were on here... I probably should have checked, but just didn't. Apologies all around. A nice surprise to get a friend request though. I certainly have been curious about your writing, as I've heard mentions of it here and there from Grandma Bleh and such. I'll make some time this week to hunker down and read some goods.
So how is school and life and all that stuff?

I think Erin mentioned to me that you were on facebook. I have a profile on there but it is a under a goofy character/persona, so not sure if you recognized me on her page. I'll send a friend request.

Cheers,

Ben

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Posted 12 Years Ago



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