The fallen : Forum : abuse


[reply] [quote]

abuse

10 Years Ago


heres another discusion, why do you think parents/adults abuse there children?
[reply] [quote]

Re: abuse

10 Years Ago


they're disgusting..
[reply] [quote]

Re: abuse

10 Years Ago


did you know that a murderer killed two child melesters? cause they disgusted him , even in crimanal ranks they are the lowest and hated
[reply] [quote]

Re: abuse

10 Years Ago


Normally they think it's normal because it happened to them as a child or they have bad anger issues. I don't find it right for a parent to beat their children ever!
[reply] [quote]

Re: abuse

10 Years Ago


People who abuse their kids have completely lost what little morals they were born with. I don't care what their problems are or what reasons they give to justify themselves, there's no way to undo the damage that's been done to that child. They'll carry those memories with them the rest of their life, and they may even be so bad that it causes the child to kill themselves trying to find an escape from the mental pain left behind. No one deserves to be treated that way. End of story.
[reply] [quote]

Re: abuse

10 Years Ago


i dont get it. its wrong. and how CAN they? theyre innocent little children hows it possible to even lay a hand on them dont these people have a soul?! besides, arnt all humans (and animals for that matter) born with protecting infants as one of their basic instincts? -_-' people are confusing
[reply] [quote]

Re: abuse

10 Years Ago


"Hurt people oftentimes hurt people, especially if it's in the same way that those people were hurt."

 A parent may abuse their child because they themselves were abused and they don't see anything wrong with how they are treating their kids. Heck, they might not even SEE that they are causing their kids harm.
Some parents that are abusing their kids may have an addiction of sorts, and that is sometimes the source of it.

And quite often, parents that are abusers have some sort of mental illness. And they can't tell that they are hurting their children in any way, shape, or form. It all depends on the type of mental illness the parent has.
I'm not saying it's RIGHT and I'm certainly not trying to play it off. But things aren't always black and white, there are shades of grey. I try to see the reason behind people's actions....because I find that the people who HAVE no extenuating factor (mental illness, having been abused, addictions, etc) are FAR more disturbing than those with an extenuating factor.

I say all this as someone who HAS an abusive parent. My mother is mentally ill, and with that and her actions as such has caused me a lot of pain and sadness. (Keep in mind, she kept trying to live medication free even though time and again it's been proven she can't). I may not have lived with her for most of my life, but she was still a major part.

My dad trusted her to tell him if she was too sick for me to go and visit, in the end that trust had turned into regret. Nobody knew how bad things were until I was 15, and even then it was just the tip of the iceberg.

Last summer, she ended up messaging me over facebook and what she said finally made me snap. I ended up laying out what she put me through over the years. And here's the thing about it all, she didn't even realize she had caused me so much pain and put me through so much. We haven't talked since then, but that's because I wanted to CHANGE our relationship into a healthy one and well.....my mom refused to meet me half-way. There's no point in trying to change if only one person is working for it.

As a "child of bi-polar" and as someone who has been abused, I see the way others in my situation usually go when they become parents, and that's usually one of two ways.
1. They end up acting just like how their parent(s) were....
OR...
2. They end up the most loving parent out there, the complete opposite as to how they were raised.

It's all about breaking the cycle, which is not an easy thing to do. It's not easy rising above all of it and healing, but it's possible. It's all in how you decide to take it. You can let it define you...Or you can grow from it. But it doesn't come without a lot of tears and pain. Healing is painful and uncomfortable and at times, you end up sticking your heels in goin' "I ain't goin' any further." But once you get through those times, you feel better and you realize "Hey, I needed to do that."

"For every hurt you experience, you need to shed just as many tears to release it."