Baby Steps

Breath,
Keep your emotions in check,
Not everyone leaves.
Yet not everyone stays either.
Some people just want to play,
Not everyone wants to belong like you do.

Just breath girl,
Remember how it felt when you loved just for love's sake?
When Love was something to be experenced, with no experation date,
No timeline,
No past?

Watch things play out,
Watch as you drop hints about how hard you could fall,
Are falling,
Maybe even have fallen,
See how he responds.
See if he feeds your ego in turn.
Or does he absorbe it,
Bring it into his heart
Into his head.
Chews on the words and proclaims himself surperrior to the rest.
Allows the bruses of the past to be wrong.
The confidence waxes,
Effections for you wane.

You know how this ends,
Messing around with men
Who are not yet over their ex.
You embrace them,
Heal them,
Change them,
Help them find that footing that will allow them to love again;
But never love you,
Not like that.

At one time you accepted this role,
Never allowed the lonleiness to take its toll,
Walked with head held high,
Always giving more.
And expecting less.
Playing the mysterious Femme Fatal,
With nothing but love to give.

You wanted it though,
Deep in your heart.
But before you had never given your all,
Thrown so completely into a man.
Love was still a sweet innocence then,
Somethig that was out of a fairy tale,
A song,
or a book.
Now it is something so despirate,
Something seemingly outta reach,
Or maybe wrong.

Working through this baggage once again,
Recgonizing that not all men are the same,
And maybe, just maybe, some don't lie.
Maybe what they say is true,
Maybe they are not trying to maniuplate you,
Own you,
Body , Mind, and Soul.

Just breath girl,
Take that first deep breath.
You got this.
It is not easy being aware,
Or fighting this up hill battle with yourself.
It is not easy holding on to your sweetness,
While the world around conspires to make you bitter.
He just might be all those bad things,
Or maybe he is truly sweet;
But to find out you must take that first step.

Reviews

[Jade]

WOW!! Really deep and so right onward as well. nicely presented

[8petallotus]

Thank you. It means a lot to me