Etched In Grey

Etched In Grey

A Poem by Alira

Another poem. Will probably be edited further. Hoping to be put back together again.

Etched In Grey
by Alira Cohen

Her fascination never wavered
In the otherwise pale blue walls
Of a memory that had
Recently come to life.
While she was pulled to her feet,
She watched them struggling,
Reaching for another link
In a cluster of rusted chains
That somehow promised something.
Her eyes were ever-faltering,
Trying to follow his every movement,
Trying to breathe freely the open water
Without catching it deep in her lungs.
She was a robotic face,
Nothing but a semi-mechanical
Fixture stood still and slowly withering,
While he was something stranger,
Something made from flesh and bone,
Something to behold, something to be feared.
And though the joints had been frozen solid,
They seemed to move for her now.
She followed closely behind
Fearing and hoping he
Would make her flesh and bone some day.

© 2022 Alira

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Author's Note

As always, if you want to comment, please be fair and respectful. Thank you.

My Review

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This one identifies itself as a memory, so we are beholding someone reminiscing about the past, maybe with some degree of pain. Apparently the speaker was deeply involved with a man, possibly one she hoped would be the mainstay of her life. That he "somehow promised something" gives the impression she now wonders what exactly it was. But back in the day she apparently regarded him almost as though he was a member of a superior species. The impression is that the frozen joints mentioned represent an emotional remoteness she could not overcome. Now, looking back, she seems to believe she might have reached him and that he would bring her up to his level. That she actually believes this gives the poem an aura of pathos. A sad but vivid portrait here.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 Year Ago

Hello, John! Once again you have left me a thorough, poetic, and well-rounded review of one of my pi.. read more

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2 Reviews
Added on April 18, 2022
Last Updated on April 18, 2022
Tags: cyborg, broken, robotic, poem, love, water



Hello, my name is Alira. I am a young writer who is majoring in creative writing at SUNY Purchase; I write anything from poems, to short stories, to scripts, to novel chapters (I’m currently wor.. more..