Apple Paradise Lost ( song-poem )

The fate of our apples after a nuclear war.

Apple Paradise Lost (song-poem)

 

 

I dream of apples that are sweet and fair

that fall from limbs through the crisp Autumn air.

I see them dropping where the cool brooks play

where children pick ’em as they come my way.

 

Remembering times when I watched them grow,

I see their blossoms in the bright day’s glow.

I dream of apples where I languish here

as I fly over each charred hemisphere.

 

I long for apples with their bright red smile

who blush around me with their low-profile.

I know their sweetness is a joy gone by

since human folly made our fruit trees die.

 

From my space station, sobbing like the rain,

I wail for apples, as I cry in vain.

I long for apples that shall never grow

in lush green valleys where bright rivers flow.

Reviews

[Aleeya R]

I love this poem. The beginning reminded me of my childhood days - apple picking with my family. Also, whether you intended to or not, you made a powerful statement at the end about the destruction of Earth's resources caused by "human folly." If we want to save those apples, we need to correct ourselves!

[Aethereal]

Thanks for our detailed review, Aleeya! We each must do what is necessary to save our Paradise from being paved over with lifeless parking lots. If we must have more parking lots, then perhaps we may place ‘em on the Moon. The life of our planet is so closely connected with our biology that if it dies we all die. If our symbiosis is broken, then we are broken. We are passengers on a living spaceship.

[Patricia Wedel]

dear Ethereal... The bees are decreasing and my
own dwarf apple trees are not producing even
those sweet apple blossoms. Your poem is penned
In dreams of bygone years. If only our present
dreams could be of more apple orchards and clear
mountain streams. Paradise lost is so sad.
truly... Pat

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your beautiful review, Patricia! I've yet to see a honey bee this Spring. All the fruit trees are crying. Paradise has been truly lost. Isn't it us who have cast ourselves from the Garden of Eden? The Earth never needed fixed, for it was just us who needed fixed.

[Patricia Wedel]

Yes... In such a short time we have managed to damage our Eco system.
In August of 2012, I visited my son and family in SLC, Utah. We went fishing in a
lake on top of two mountains on two weekends. The first mountain lake had
Chipmunks running around our feet. We drove our vehicle up each
mountain. The second mountain lake had beautiful
Ducks with their ducklings swimming by where we fished.
This is just a sampling of the beauty that still exists in our country.
But for how long? We did have fish for dinner
after each fishing trip. Truly... Pat

[Clockwork]

I've notice over the years I've lived in central Pennsylvania, that the number of orchards has decreased. While its the result of urbanization, I have the same feeling you describe in the last three lines of the final stanza. Housing developments have replaced some of the farms I loved when I was a child.

Your second stanza reminds me of a few class trips to orchards. I like your tone of longing, your rhymes, and the classic feel of your poetry. Its as if its a living thing that could grown roots of its own accord.

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your detailed review, Clockwork! I love those apples.

[Pryde Foltz]

From my space station, sobbing like the rain,
I wail for apples, as I cry in vain.
I long for apples that shall never grow
in lush green valleys where bright rivers flow.

Great concept and execution, Ethereal.

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your detailed review, Foltz! To get more insight into what inspired this verse, read the last verse of Stephen Foster's song, "I dream of Jeanie with the light brow hair." Stephen Foster was one of the greatest.

[ShahW1]

Oh this is so sweet, has an easy beat and was a joy to read. X

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your review, ShahW1! We'll never know how much we miss those apples 'til we lose 'em all.

[Pure Innocence]

I love the flow and meaning behind this piece. In reference to some reviews you have posted to my pieces, I can now see how you create that sing-song flow. Very well done... I may write a poem like this soon. I really like the flow it creates and the fact that I could just put chords to it later so that it becomes a song.

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your review, Pure Innocence! Read Stephen Fosters song-poem “Jeanie with the light brown hair” and then compare it with my poem and you will get some insight into how I was able to write this poem the way I did. I’ll be looking forward to reading your poem. Try it with rhyming couplets as I did in this poem.

[Rachelle]

Wonderful use of a time-honored metaphor! I wish to say more but I will hold back for the meantime. Thank you for a thought-provoking poem!

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your suspenseful review, Rachelle! More? Now you’ve left me hanging over a flaming abyss on a cliffhanger.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Indeed man dreams of things which he doesn't have. If he already has those kind of apples in his hands, would he still dream for them? LOL.
Nice rhyme scheme and of course, rhythm. This can be interpreted in different ways. Always brilliant!

[Aethereal]

Thanks for your detailed review, Dhaye! Have you noticed that this poem sings somewhat to the tone and theme of Stephen Foster's classic song " I dream of Jeanie with the light brown hair" ? Read his song-poem and then compare it with mine.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

You're welcome.

[Aethereal]

Stephen Foster was always brilliant too. If you must study songs; study that classical Southern gentleman of a bygone era, Stephen Foster.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Listening at his "Beautiful Dreamer" right now. LOL.
BTW, honestly speaking, I love more pop and R&B music...and only few classic.

[Aethereal]

We learn to enjoy each style of music. No style is better or worse than any other. The styles tend to cross breed at times. Stephen Foster's style could easily be rewritten to mimic any other style and vise versa. Rock and Jazz has its ancient African roots. Elvis Presley was a copycat.