I am a Phoenix

I am a Phoenix

A Poem by Lavi
"

If a phoenix can be reborn anew, so can we.

"
I am a warrior, not the casualty of your domain
My mistakes no longer represented as a living bane
And though we may have once seen with the same eyes
You have long since forgotten your blame for your lies

I am your fault, the truth of your disguise
My soul a reflection of your love's demise
And though we may share the same kin
My perseverance has removed your excuse's firing pin

I am the fight, the scars of our memoirs
My life continues outside your close-minded prison bars
And though you may have tried to lock my heart away
You failed to have my resolve decay

I am the pain, the reminder of what you have lost
You learned too late the line you shouldn't have crossed
And now you may fear the unknown you have created
For becoming obsessed with the ego you've cultivated

I am a phoenix, the defender of my soul
No longer the victim of your control

© 2018 Lavi


Author's Note

Lavi
I have rewritten the beginning due to inconsistency with the ending as well as re-titled the poem. Hope you enjoy!

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Featured Review

I feel your strength here.

I am especially moved by the last portion "I am the pain, the reminder of what you have lost
You learned too late the line you shouldn't have crossed
And fear the unknown you have created
Too obsessed by the ego you've cultivated

I am a phoenix, the defender of my soul
No longer the victim of your control"

The rhyming in the first stanza doesn't mimic the structure of the rest of your work. So it kind of messes with the flow a bit

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Lavi

6 Years Ago

Okay, I got it fixed up. The flow is much better now.
Viana T

6 Years Ago

This works, beautiful:)
Lavi

6 Years Ago

Thank you, I'm glad.



Reviews

Are you by any chance Scorpio Sun or Scorpio Rising!?

Posted 6 Years Ago


Mavericks

6 Years Ago

It's okay. The Phoenix and the intensity led me think there must be some Scorpio energy in you. I am.. read more
Lavi

6 Years Ago

Its funny to me how everyone thinks of Capricorn is a mountain goat... not that the totem animal isn.. read more
Mavericks

6 Years Ago

You are funny. But, i know what you men.
Powerful message with an even more powerful delivery, wow! I loved this poem and the vivid imagery you continually use with your language. Keep up the great work!

Posted 6 Years Ago


Lavi

6 Years Ago

Thank you! Sometimes I think the strongest critic to my work is myself so its good to see/know other.. read more
I love how the theme of the phoenix (rebirth) is tied into the message. All of our difficulties and struggles in life make us who we are, and when we overcome those obstacles, we are stronger than ever. The things that used to torment us no longer have power over us.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Lavi

6 Years Ago

Exactly. The phoenix is definitely my totem :) Thanks for reading!
I feel your strength here.

I am especially moved by the last portion "I am the pain, the reminder of what you have lost
You learned too late the line you shouldn't have crossed
And fear the unknown you have created
Too obsessed by the ego you've cultivated

I am a phoenix, the defender of my soul
No longer the victim of your control"

The rhyming in the first stanza doesn't mimic the structure of the rest of your work. So it kind of messes with the flow a bit

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Lavi

6 Years Ago

Okay, I got it fixed up. The flow is much better now.
Viana T

6 Years Ago

This works, beautiful:)
Lavi

6 Years Ago

Thank you, I'm glad.

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4 Reviews
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Added on January 25, 2018
Last Updated on May 25, 2018
Tags: Contest Winner

Author

Lavi
Lavi

Dallas, TX



About
Here, I go by Lavi because even if I weren't a relatively private person, I am not fond of my given name in the first place, and as someone once said, "you don't live up to the name. The name lives up.. more..

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