Empty House

I don’t know where you've gone.

Presses against me a cold silver knife,

Red spills on the small kitchen tile

The windows break with a shattering silence,

As I dream to wake to your smile.

 

Curtains still with a haunting grace

This way won’t suffice any longer,

My limbs break down to faint,

Sitting upon a ghost so somber.

 

Sleepless days fill my life away

Time frozen in a clock that’s broken,

Like my heart it’s numb and lifeless

A pendulum so still and frozen.

 

Looking at my hands I realize

That you have gone and I’ve begun

To miss you through the foggy mornings

You disappeared with the lightless sun.

 

The walls hear out of no reserve,

Echoes a silent storm at dawn,

This empty house I die to serve

I don’t know where you’ve gone.

 

Author's Note

Así que esperar a que te gusta una casa solitaria, hasta que me volverán a ver y vivir en mí. Hasta entonces, mis ventanas dolor.

Reviews

[Murtuza]

Sets quite a tone from beginning to end. I like the perspective that you've shown of the persona. The empty house once filled with happiness and laughter is now only a shell with no soul. There is so much depth to this and just devours the reader into the world of loneliness.
A brilliant job in writing this, well done! :)

[zainul]

You have vividly painted the emptiness.
Felt myself wailing among the walls of the empty house.
Great work,indeed.

[☯]

For some reason, this poem reminded me of a couple of books I've been reading. The depth and sadness is literally echoing everywhere! I especially liked the line:
"Sleepless days fill my life away
Time frozen in a clock that’s broken,
Like my heart it’s numb and lifeless
A pendulum so still and frozen."

Why? Because I can imagine this clear in my imagination. I saw ice coated everywhere. I really really liked this one. Just outstanding! :)

[Holly M. May]

I really enjoyed this poem, lots of great imagry. =3

The only thing I noticed was that the beginning had very strong intent, but almost wilted away at the end. There is a lot going on in this poem story wise, so maybe if this was an introduction to a story it might be really nice, because I want to know more! =3

Overall it was very enjoyable, absolutely love the imagry. =3

[Sir Robert Robbie Lord ..]

SOMETIMES, I WISH IT WAS A GHOST HOUSE
sometimes, emptiness sure does torment
the impatient soul that can't wait to see whom and what will
meet thier eyes today, tonight, penless, penniless with no cap so i chew
on my hat or shoe and wait, textwrite, call, blip, blip, blip on the cellphone
so charming, wondering, am i loved, am i alone i did very well
enjoy your poem and i scream in joy, pain
I WISH IT WAS A GHOST HOUSE

[Sarah E. Pearson]

Yo soy no hablo espanol.
lol.
Very powerful; very amazing. the lines have a steady flow to them. they capture perfectly the anticipation of trying to wait patiently for someone.

[Lily Mae]

Wondering and waiting for someone else to show.. very powerful.. xx

[ivizarx]

It definitely sets up a scene very eerie for someone who's worried and caught within the snare of waiting patiently for someone else... it's an excellent write, well done I must say ;)

[Cheng Yew,Chew]

emptiness of waiting

[joshua deathdealer]

This is simply amazing. I'm impressed..Excellent work.