A Name Without

Mia Cara for MY LOVE

My son,

If you are reading this letter now, I know therefore that I already left you and had gone somewhere where we will meet again but not that soon. Truly you are my son. Your father’s and mine. You are my one great treasure and I will give you everything I have just to know you are safe and well away from harm.

Now, I don’t want you living in lies anymore. I loved your father dearly. As you are reading this, know that both of you are my king and my prince. I loved him but it was a love born out of deceit. Out of betrayal. Out of envy and jealousy that the man I loved would be without a name but a dream for me.

Your father is a kind and caring man, a strong man who could protect those he loves and a man who can be gentle both at the same time. He was the man who loved fully with all his heart. He never asked for anything in return. Smiles are enough for him and I, even I, without him knowing the truth loved me with all his heart as if I was his life. Today I like to tell you how bad I’ve been as a friend, how tricky I’ve been as a wife and how shrewd I’ve been when I was alive.

I told you just how much your father is a good man. Now let me tell you this: your mother too, had a good friend in her lifetime. She’s beautiful. Kind. Caring. Humble. Rich. All of the things that you would find in a woman, you can find in her. She was my best friend. My only trusted friend. A friend who felt like a twin sister to me. And she loved your father. The difference between her and I is that she can’t marry whom she love because she was left without a choice but I do. I can choose who I wish to love and marry and I did what I felt about myself is right at that time. Call that friend of mine Cara. Your aunt Cara.

Your aunt Cara hid her identity and wrote your father love letters. Your father is a so-called bodyguard before. Cara’s father hired him as his daughter’s protector. To avoid her father’s reprimand, she used a fake name/. So your father knew her in her letters as Eliza. Whenever your father receives a letter from Eliza, he smiles together with the day and feels everything is good and fine though the situation is bad. Day by day he fell in love with Eliza not knowing who she is though he knew she’s just around. Watching. Looking through him. Wanting to know what he will do next. As much as he wanted, your father couldn’t write back to Eliza. There was no return address to give the letter and as spontaneous as love comes, so the letter do in your father’s hands.

Because of their growing bond with each other, Eliza decided to reveal herself to your father. But just before she could do that, Cara’s father stopped her and threatened that if she is found together with a man, the latter would be killed without any more delay. She sent me in her stead. Instead of telling the truth of who Eliza really is, I lied to your father. I told him I was your aunt Cara. I told him that I was Eliza writing her the letters. Lying had been easy for me because I know how Cara really felt for your father. I loved him. I loved him so much that I can throw down every bouts of friendship between Cara and I just to have him.

Your father and I got married. I never tried to contact Cara since then. It took us two years before you were conceived and what a great joy it has been for us! Your father loved us dearly. But instead of calling me by my name, he used to call me Eliza thinking that I was really her. Every time I hear that name, I feel guilty of what I’ve done. I sorely miss my friend. My one true friend whom I betrayed. And I believe time has its way of payback. Because when I went to the doctor, they discovered a tumor growing inside my body. They had me choose. Take it out and let you die or let you live and let it infest me. I choose the latter. I so loved you son, I can’t let that joy in your father’s eyes be gone just because I chose to let you die. Please know that I love you. I did what I did because I loved your father and I want to be happy to the point that I forgot someone else is hurting.

Forgive me, my son. I want to make things right with your father. I want you to meet your aunt Cara. I tell you she’s kind. Ask her forgiveness for me. Tell your father how much I love him and please, don’t let him hate me by knowing all these things I said to you.

My son, please keep me always in your heart. Wherever you are, I promise there I will be for you.

Always,

Mother

Author's Note

what do you think and suggest? :)