no room for shame in my wardrobe

no room for shame in my wardrobe

A Chapter by Ana Papaya
"

.

"
 i have no room for shame in my wardrobe
 shame is a neck tie pulled too tight
 i've become too loose to be hung by such things
 i wear dresses made of cuss words  
 and jewels crafted of charms 
 i am a woman beheld 
 with no need for ones arms to hold me caged 
 i have no room for shame
 shame is a silk scarf tied much too tight 
 in dark black 
or some other colour that's bright 
it squeezes when you swallow
 slowing your breath  
 choking you  
so hard you see fireworks
 bursting in your eyes 
and you squeeze your legs together tight 
trapping frozen hands 
that leave you numb between your thighs
 shame makes you want to die
 i've no room for scarves nor ties 
 no arms, no cage 
i've become too loose to be hung by such things 
 no boxes nor chains, no desire for small spaces 
 no collar, no leash to filter the truth with nothing to flay
 it's not a life i wish to live  
 not that way 
 i wear dresses made of cuss words 
with jewels crafted of charms 
 it keeps me safe 
 ~


© 2020 Ana Papaya


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Featured Review


This is one helluva poem Ana.. I think it needed to be writ, and I'm glad that you wrote it, for all the victims out there and would be victims everywhere, and perpetrators too... let these words be a lesson in how to survive, thrive and grow regardless.... N

Posted 2 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Hi Neville, thanks for approving. :)
Neville

2 Years Ago

you are much more than welcome :)



Reviews

I wish I'd written this . . . but even more so, I wish I'd lived it. After a childhood of heart-shaming abuse, it took too many years to shake it all off & become the woman in your poem. I applaud you as a voice among young women standing tall & proud, standing above the fray, declaring that nobody else (outside yourself) can shame you unless you are already harboring shame. Your ongoing string of metaphors bangs loud like a drum, but without dissonance (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 5 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

4 Weeks Ago

Thanks so much Margie (hugs)
You've read a ton of my poems and stories while I was away. Tha.. read more
This a fantastic portrayal of a woman who's making a valiant attempt to live by her own rules and not let her scape be tarnished by the judgement of the world. She has created a sort of armour for herself of things that are her strengths and she goes on being freely herself with minimum fuss.

Posted 1 Year Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

1 Year Ago

Good morning P. Thank you for reaching in to find this one.
AJNJ

1 Year Ago

I enjoy your writing very much. You’re welcome Ms. Ana.
I keep a few pieces of shame in the back of my closet but i covered them with some old work clothes so as not to be seen. I know they are there and that's enough... okay sometimes when no one is looking, i throw them on just to see how they fit and i am always grateful when they are still in need of some tailoring! Once in a while i forget to take them off and put something on over them before leaving the house and a bit of shame sticks out un-tucked for the world to see. and then some wonderful person comes along with a gentle hand and pushes them back into place.
This was fantastic writing Papaya I loved every line


Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

You are lucky to have such wonderful people around you to tuck things back into their place when the.. read more
Robert Trakofler

2 Years Ago

I am indeed Ana I am so grateful for the friends I have :) but it took a long time for me to open my.. read more
Very smooth and enlightening.l love it.

Posted 2 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Thank you so much Simba.
Shame does indeed bind us, and the bindings are difficult to shed. It also prevents us from developing intimate relationships. I suppose intimacy is something we might trade for personal protection and peace. Meaningful, well written poem, Ana.

Posted 2 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Thanks very much R.E., for the thoughtful and insightful comment.

This is one helluva poem Ana.. I think it needed to be writ, and I'm glad that you wrote it, for all the victims out there and would be victims everywhere, and perpetrators too... let these words be a lesson in how to survive, thrive and grow regardless.... N

Posted 2 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Hi Neville, thanks for approving. :)
Neville

2 Years Ago

you are much more than welcome :)
this is really a potent write...and expresses how shame is something that comes from without....not really within...we learn shame from the way others treat us...and if we let them, we become too good at it. The key is to love ourselves, be confident in who we are, and proud...and not let others' opinions of us dictate whether or not we sill suffer that shame...Metaphorically brilliant here...
and a great last line...wraps it up with bang.
j.

Posted 2 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Thank you so much Jacob, I appreciate that very much.
This was quite chilling to read Ana. There were references to abuse and a determination here not to give in to the shame that comes with it. Difficult and brave subject to write about. Love the title, so good.

Chris

Posted 2 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Thanks Chris. Always appreciate your thoughtful comments.
This reminds me of why I think zoo's are mostly just prisons for animals.

Shame is a prison without bars for humans. As a nasty side effect of our general human intellect, shame can be a suffocating cage that keeps us from exploring the natural beauty of the world and expressing the natural beauty within ourselves.

Posted 2 Years Ago


2 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

Yes, that is so very true. Thanks so much, i appreciate the insightful comment.
There is a dogged defiance in this as the protagonist appears in salutary mood, to state their independance and determination not to be abused.

Posted 2 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Ana Papaya

2 Years Ago

That's a fine interpretation. Thanks for popping in to read This one!

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Added on May 19, 2019
Last Updated on May 31, 2020

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