Empty Thoughts

Thinking things over

 

Thoughts are words and images forming in your head,

Continuous throughout the day, into the night till you go to bed.

 

Empty thoughts is your mind wandering,

Put them into action and stop that wasteful pondering.

 

Empty thoughts are a waste of time,

It's your mind keeping active, with no reason or rhyme.

 

Take control of your empty thought addiction,

Put them into action with renewed courage and conviction.

 

Keep the precious ones deep within your mind,

Open and revisit them and you never know what you will find.

 

That way you will have more time for conscious living,

No more day dreams, slacking, taking ideas from others, but just giving.

 

Remember, life is well worth living!

Author's Note

Anyhting constructive as I can only improve.

Reviews

[S. Kimball]

Solid poem.

I liked the simple, short structure used. Ironically, I was writing a poem earlier today following the same guidelines, except the first sentence was always ended with a semicolon.

The fourth stanza's first sentence was very well put. The second sentence has a pronoun agreement error though. It's unclear at first what you're referring to with "them".

Now for some suggestions.


Second stanza:
"Empty thoughts is your mind wandering,
Put them into action and stop that wasteful pondering."

You have a pronoun agreement error in sentence one. Either "Empty thought is your mind wandering" or "Empty thoughts are your mind wandering" would be correct.

Sixth stanza:
"No more day dreams, slacking, taking ideas from others, but just giving."

I'd try rewriting this a bit. It doesn't jive very well with it's partner sentence, and it doesn't flow well overall.

Overall, good work.